Disciplining a 1-Year Old

[McPatrickClan]

Hello Friends- We have two kids in the house right now. Elijah is four and Ella Grace is one year old. Elijah is a wonderful kid. He responds well to discipline, is well-mannered and is respectful. He was also very good-natured as a baby.

Ella Grace, on the other hand, is one stubborn cookie! She will scream for no reason (maybe to get attention?) in various places, cries when she does not get her way and tends to throw a fit at times. It's really stressful because, for example, when she wakes up, if she does not get her cup of milk within about 10 minutes of waking up, she starts whining and crying.

I have used corporal punishment before with her (seemed to work well, she understood not to touch my eyeglasses) and she really hates when I take things away from her. What do you guys think is a productive & Biblical method of discipline for her?

 

[Jimmy the Greek]

My son has girls 6 and 3. They are as different as night and day. The first was easy on them, the second has been a real challenge -- and adversely affects the behavior of the older one.

They have made effective use of the "time out" rule -- with a special "naughty place" to sit. I think it is the same idea promoted on TV's "Super Nanny" series. It seems to work better than spanking, although they get a bit of that too.

All-in-all it is a battle of the wills. And you must win. It can be done without breaking her spirit.

The other big rule (prerequisite) I would mention is that husband and wife should always present a united front to the child regarding discipline. They can tell if you don't agree with each other and will play you like a fiddle -- and that's from 1 year-old and onward. If she gets any relief running to momma, you're doomed.

Just my $0.02.

 

[Backwoods Presbyterian]

Consistency...Consistency...Consistency...(From Both Parents)...

Our 2-yr old is/has been a quite an ornery child and the thing that has seemed to help the most with her is grounding her in her room.

 

[jwithnell]

If it's any encouragement, stubbornness (if properly directed) can result in an older child who won't be budged off her beliefs -- at least that was our experience with our now 23-year-old daughter.

 

[Mushroom]

All-in-all it is a battle of the wills. And you must win. It can be done without breaking her spirit.

Amen, brother, especially the last sentence. Not an easy balance, but one that is absolutely necessary.

If it's any encouragement, stubbornness (if properly directed) can result in an older child who won't be budged off her beliefs -- at least that was our experience with our now 23-year-old daughter.

We're finding that to be true with our most stubborn, our 8yo daughter. She's been a real trial at times, but is now very committed to her studies, her violin (blows her teacher and orchestra judges away), and more importantly, her faith. She asks everyone if they're a christian, and is incredulous if they say they aren't. No fear.

 

[Presbyterian Deacon]

My son tried the "crying to get what he wants" thing when he was about 1. It was met with absolute refusal to give in by both myself and wife. Often we would "remove" him from us by putting him in his crib, or sitting him in a corner in the other room, and saying crying doesn't work. We will come back and get you when you calm down.


As has been said, consistency is important...but in later years they remember, crying has never worked! Start now! because a pre-teen (or worse later -- a teenage) girl will use the "crying" thing if you don't break the habit early in her life!

You have to be firm. "I said NO. I am the parent -- you are the child. I make the rules."

At 11 my son knows who is in charge.

We have friends with an 11 year old daughter who was allowed to "win" when she did the crying thing as a youngster. Trust me-- if not nipped in the bud-- it only gets worse!

 

[McPatrickClan]

Good advice- thank you all. Anyone have a thought on the "spanking" idea of an 1-year old (she's 16 mos.). We do it with my son & he understands completely.

 

[Grace Alone]

Gavin, I really think it depends on the offense. If the baby tries to stick a fork in the electrical outlet (or hand on stove, etc.) and ignores your strong verbal warning (willful disobedience), then a a little spank on her hand or bottom might be appropriate. But in most cases, I think telling her no and then putting her in time out for a minute or two is the best course of action. Ignore her consistently (in time out)and she will learn to stop inappropriate behaviors. I'd have to agree that the Super Nanny's techniques are very good.

 

[Webservant]

Hello Friends- We have two kids in the house right now. Elijah is four and Ella Grace is one year old. Elijah is a wonderful kid. He responds well to discipline, is well-mannered and is respectful. He was also very good-natured as a baby.

Ella Grace, on the other hand, is one stubborn cookie! She will scream for no reason (maybe to get attention?) in various places, cries when she does not get her way and tends to throw a fit at times. It's really stressful because, for example, when she wakes up, if she does not get her cup of milk within about 10 minutes of waking up, she starts whining and crying.

I have used corporal punishment before with her (seemed to work well, she understood not to touch my eyeglasses) and she really hates when I take things away from her. What do you guys think is a productive & Biblical method of discipline for her?

My oldest son was so bad that we thought we had ruined him. Spanking didn't work - in fact, nothing worked. An older, wiser lady at my job told me he's doing it for attention and to stop rewarding him. I followed her advice - when he engaged in his horrid behavior, I simply turned around and walked away. It took maybe a week - but he became a model child after that.