# Dealing with non-Reformed believers



## tcalbrecht (May 1, 2007)

We hang around with a lot of Christians who are not Reformed. In the course of a conversation we may get some remark where a response is sort of expected. E.g., we have friends that are just enamored with folks on the TBN circuit like Joyce Meyer, John Hagee, and TD Jakes. How does one be polite without giving the impression of agreement? I can’t honestly tell them I do not know who these people are, cuz I do and I think they are way off base. 

I’ve thought some time to say, “Do you really want to know what I think?”

Any suggestions?


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## crhoades (May 1, 2007)

tcalbrecht said:


> We hang around with a lot of Christians who are not Reformed. In the course of a conversation we may get some remark where a response is sort of expected. E.g., we have friends that are just enamored with folks on the TBN circuit like Joyce Meyer, John Hagee, and TD Jakes. How does one be polite without giving the impression of agreement? I can’t honestly tell them I do not know who these people are, cuz I do and I think they are way off base.
> 
> I’ve thought some time to say, “Do you really want to know what I think?”
> 
> Any suggestions?


 
Open up the question by asking them what about those guys appeals to them? Then you can zero in on it and if it is common ground, build upon it and recommend a book about it from the reformed perspective or if it is a point of contention socratically ask them a few questions to get them thinking. Leave it alone and bring it up at a later point.


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## tfelice (May 1, 2007)

I have found that it is best when talking with the non-Reformed to ask leading questions that get them to discover that the teachings that they follow are in error. Let them back themselves into an illogical corner and then you can help them out of it by showing the truth from Scripture.

A good one for the health & wealth crowd is to ask them if they believe that there are any poor Christians. Mention something like believers in some third world country and then ask them if they believe if those people's faith isn't strong enough then.


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## A5pointer (May 1, 2007)

Welcome to the evangelical twighlite zone. Many times it doesn't matter how or what you say. The only advice I can give you is to invest the time watching those in question so you can speak specifically about what they do and say.


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## Chris (May 1, 2007)

Welcome to my world. 

I tend to divide them into 2 classes: 

a) little old ladies and really old, hardheaded types. I act gracious but avoid theology. 

b) People under the age of ~45 or so. I engage them with questions whenever possible. Making people think logically - while staying within the bounds of Scripture - is great fun.


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## Herald (May 1, 2007)

Well gee...according to my Presbyterian brethren on the PB we Baptists are not Reformed, so talk to your friends the way to talk to us Baptists!


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## crhoades (May 1, 2007)

BaptistInCrisis said:


> Well gee...according to my Presbyterian brethren on the PB we Baptists are not Reformed, so talk to your friends the way to talk to us Baptists!


Shouldn't we treat them with _more_ grace in order to win them over?


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## Ivan (May 1, 2007)

crhoades said:


> Shouldn't we treat them with _more_ grace in order to win them over?



I must admit that's funny!


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## crhoades (May 1, 2007)

Ivan said:


> I must admit that's funny!


 
We must at times either laugh at ourselves or cry.


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## KMK (May 1, 2007)

Remember, "knowledge puffeth up, but charity edifieth." We must examine our heart before asking questions. Arguing with people you hardly know never accomplishes anything but vanity. If you really care about the salvation of others, then love them. When they perceive, over a period of time, that you do in fact love them and love the Lord, then they will actually care about your knowledge. It takes commitment to people to make a change.


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## Herald (May 1, 2007)

crhoades said:


> Shouldn't we treat them with _more_ grace in order to win them over?



I'd hope so!


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## Ivan (May 1, 2007)

crhoades said:


> We must at times either laugh at ourselves or cry.


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## Iconoclast (May 2, 2007)

*Present truth patiently*

2 Tim2:24-26 is always helpful. Present The Lord Jesus Christ to them as the bible portrays Him. Look at the Revelation of The Lamb on the throne,given to John,in REv4-5 and all the worship given to Him. 
Speak about His priestly intercession for us,as in Hebrews 2;17- 4:16. 
This section of Hebrews urges a serious and diligent view of our Lord.ie,
Heb. 4:1 Let us therefore fear
4;11 let us labour
4:14 let us hold fast our profession
4;16 let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace
Speak of these things often with them ,and in time they will hunger for more of the biblical Lord Jesus Christ.


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## Semper Fidelis (May 2, 2007)

Many evangelicals are far too Biblically ignorant to have a 5 minute conversation sink in. Discipleship is a huge commitment in time and resources. I've been investing my time in teaching a number of people at my Church for over a year and a half and just now some things are really sinking in.

I think the worse thing you can do with some is to use doctrinal terms right out of the chute and hit them with the 5 points of Calvinism.

I've spoken very boldly about the excesses and ignorance of the Evangelical Church to those who practice the same things. Since I'm speaking broadly they usually can take some pretty hard hitting critiques. I always use very plain language, relate it to a Biblical passage, and provide many analogies. You can also take a small point of agreement and build on it by a "...and furthermore..." and take the discussion where they might not have agreed initially but now that you explained it to them it makes sense.


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