# What would you do in my position?



## Croghanite (Dec 16, 2006)

My family and I currently live with my in laws. We sold our house and are relocating to Charlotte, NC as soon as we find a house to buy. They have graciously allowed us to move in untill we find a home in NC. My in laws are professed Christians. 

Now my problem: I believe God would not be pleased for us to celebrate "Christmas" the way our culture as a whole does ie, tree, santa and so on. 

What should I do as far as allowing my kids to set up the tree and decorations and that sort of thing. There is no way to totally keep them out of the traditions since we live here. We have already told the in laws our beliefs and of course they think were nuts but are not critical of us. I forgot to mention I just recently came to these conclusions about Christmas. 

I need some Godly councel.


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## tdowns (Dec 16, 2006)

*Just some thoughts.....*

I don't know, but here are my initial thoughts, what you might call your average guy, non-scripturally backed thoughts....but, you said you just came to these beliefs, and it seems, some of my biggest over the top "preaching" on topics came right after I came to those beliefs, and later, I usually come to the conclusion, that, a patient, more loving strategy would have been better.

Personally, I'd enjoy it the same way you would have last year, along with a very brief comment on what you believe (sounds like you covered that) and lots of prayer when things pop up you don't like, and then worry about planting the seeds and doing the instruction throughout the next year, after you've moved out of their house, and then invite them to YOUR version of a proper Christmas in your new house next year..... 

There are sooooo many battles to fight, , and few are worth conflict during this time of celebration.


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## Romans922 (Dec 16, 2006)

What if the proper version of Christmas is no Christmas at all?


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## Blueridge Believer (Dec 16, 2006)

LAYMAN JOE said:


> My family and I currently live with my in laws. We sold our house and are relocating to Charlotte, NC as soon as we find a house to buy. They have graciously allowed us to move in untill we find a home in NC. My in laws are professed Christians.
> 
> Now my problem: I believe God would not be pleased for us to celebrate "Christmas" the way our culture as a whole does ie, tree, santa and so on.
> 
> ...




I feel for you brother. I despise this "holiday" as well. Just have some grace about yourself, bite your lip, and get along. My parents think I'm nuts as well.
What! No Christ-mass, no Ishtar!


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## Croghanite (Dec 16, 2006)

Romans922 said:


> What if the proper version of Christmas is no Christmas at all?



I cant tell if this is a rhetorical question or not. I believe the proper version of Christmas IS nothing at all.
Thats where im having trouble. Its almost as if I would be sinning if I were to take place in any of these activities just because I live here. I would be condoning these activities contradictory to what I believe and what I have taught my oldest son. I did inform him that we should not take place in such things and explained how we are kinda stuck with taking place in them this year. I appreciate all your thoughts. More would help.


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## polemic_turtle (Dec 17, 2006)

Christian liberty should get you through fine. Perhaps you can be a good influence by using this opportunity to center this holiday upon the whole of Christ's life. Of course don't suggest that anything you're doing in all the gift-giving, food, and family is neccesarily based upon a Scriptural precedent or command, but remember that you can either be a mirror which reflects Christ's glory to whomever will look whenever they look or you can be a wet blanket who people will pity. I think there is something to be said for making the best out of every situation. *two cents*


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## NaphtaliPress (Dec 17, 2006)

http://www.puritanboard.com/showthread.php?t=17428



joshua said:


> I say you talk a lot about ol pretend Santa and his reindeer. And this "holiday" is just that. A time to spend with family and pretend about Santa and his jolly elves. At least, this is where "I am" right now. I think Chris Coldwell posted an excerpt from his pastor somewhere concerning the celebration of "Christmas".


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## Croghanite (Dec 17, 2006)

Mr. Coldwell,
Thanks for the link. I definitely agree that we should not judge one another concerning such things. I hold nothing against brethren who recognize one day over another. Thats not my problem. 
Im struggling with the fact that my participation in the tradition of christmas is sin and im in a home where I cant avoid it.

I absolutely love and appreciate Naphtali Press and the Blue Banner. Keep up the good work, its awesome!


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## NaphtaliPress (Dec 17, 2006)

Thanks Joe; though most of my effort now is plowed into _The Confessional Presbyterian_ journal. I don't know what your family does; but I'd advise getting with your folks and coming to an understanding on what you all can do together, participate in what communal activities you can do so in good conscience, etc. If you think that there is nothing you can participate in with a clear conscience, then all I can say is, that convictions don't always come at convenient times (been there). You may need to think along the lines of not so much what you think you may be condoning--you can make that clear to your relatives--but what you're willing to tolerate for the gospel's (and family relations') sake.  
For what it's worth, my relatives and some folks from my sister's church are just now caroling outside our house for my mother. I'm hiding.



LAYMAN JOE said:


> Mr. Coldwell,
> Thanks for the link. I definitely agree that we should not judge one another concerning such things. I hold nothing against brethren who recognize one day over another. Thats not my problem.
> Im struggling with the fact that my participation in the tradition of christmas is sin and im in a home where I cant avoid it.
> 
> I absolutely love and appreciate Naphtali Press and the Blue Banner. Keep up the good work, its awesome!


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## Croghanite (Dec 17, 2006)

Hey, did you ever get that generator issue worked out?


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## NaphtaliPress (Dec 17, 2006)

Not really;  shelved for next year; spending all the money on other things; floors, landscaping, etc. But it is on the agenda as I do think it is a matter of good percaution, if it is not too much money, as far as my mother's health and safety is concerned. If it were only me, I wouldn't do it.


LAYMAN JOE said:


> Hey, did you ever get that generator issue worked out?


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## BJClark (Dec 17, 2006)

you could suggest that if your in laws desire to get your family something for Christmas, that they donate money to their church/your church or something like that...that way you aren't directly particating, and yet they could still give you something that is important to you.

But, if they decide to give you/your kids something anyway...be gracious and thank them, and realize it is just that...a gift..

gifts are not something that have strings attached to them, that you are obligated to give something in return.


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## JoeRe4mer (Dec 20, 2006)

Blueridge reformer said:


> I feel for you brother. I despise this "holiday" as well. Just have some grace about yourself, bite your lip, and get along. My parents think I'm nuts as well.
> What! No Christ-mass, no Ishtar!


  

I have to agree with Blueridge, this holiday has nothing to do with the Lord Jesus anymore and everthing to do with American Consumerism. My wife and I have agreed not to lie to our daughter about Santa and instead teach her about Christ. I know some wont agree but the Lords Day is the day we should teach our childern to observe and not (Decmeber 25). Stand you ground in Christ and be polite but firm.


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## providenceboard (Dec 20, 2006)

JoeRe4mer said:


> I have to agree with Blueridge, this holiday has nothing to do with the Lord Jesus anymore and everthing to do with American Consumerism. My wife and I have agreed not to lie to our daughter about Santa and instead teach her about Christ. I know some wont agree but the Lords Day is the day we should teach our childern to observe and not (Decmeber 25). Stand you ground in Christ and be polite but firm.



  

Don't be a jerk. Be polite, and talk about it. I have found that while others will still want to do the Christmas thing, If you are nice, and smile while you explain yourself, people will understand what you are saying. Let me ask you this...Did your current view of Christmas take you 20 minutes to arrive at? Don't expect it of others.

Here is what I would suggest - Get along and compromise with your relatives, but don't just go along with everything. Pick the things that you are going to "hold your ground on", and make the list as short as your conscience will allow you, and excuse you and your family from those things. Remember, the thing you are concerned with is that of doing things of a religious nature to please God that he has not told us to do, and not frosty or a tree.


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## jaybird0827 (Dec 20, 2006)

providenceboard said:


> Don't be a jerk. Be polite, and talk about it. I have found that while others will still want to do the Christmas thing, If you are nice, and smile while you explain yourself, people will understand what you are saying. Let me ask you this...Did your current view of Christmas take you 20 minutes to arrive at? Don't expect it of others.
> 
> Here is what I would suggest - Get along and compromise with your relatives, but don't just go along with everything. Pick the things that you are going to "hold your ground on", and make the list as short as your conscience will allow you, and excuse you and your family from those things. Remember, the thing you are concerned with is that of doing things of a religious nature to please God that he has not told us to do, and not frosty or a tree.


 
 

Jeff is right, and so is "JoeRe4mer". Nobody said this was going to be easy, but there's no need to set yourself up for ridicule or loss of respect. The last thing you want to do is fulfill people's "grinch" or "scrooge" stereotypes! Cheer up - the *26th* is less than a week away. I mean seriously many times I manage to get through the things I dread most by looking forward to the other side when those things become part of the past. The grace of God go with you, brother, and may he grant you that wisdom that is unto godliness.


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## NaphtaliPress (Dec 20, 2006)

jaybird0827 said:


> Cheer up - the *26th* is less than a week away.


My birthday!  How old am I?  
Seriously, still


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## jaybird0827 (Dec 20, 2006)

Our wedding anniversary is the next day after that. This year, if we live to see the day, it will be *our 25th*. God is good.

You may be somewhat shocked to find out that December 27, 1981 fell a Sunday (just saved you the trouble). We were both members in the mainline liberal at the time, and our only evangelical background to date was antinomian. By the grace of God we repented.


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## NaphtaliPress (Dec 20, 2006)

jaybird0827 said:


> Our wedding anniversary is the next day after that. This year, if we live to see the day, it will be *our 25th*. God is good.
> 
> You may be somewhat shocked to find out that December 27, 1981 fell a Sunday (just saved you the trouble). We were both members in the mainline liberal at the time, and our only evangelical background to date was antinomian. By the grace of God we repented.


Lord willing, happy 25th! I was pretty clueless in 1981 as well; though a couple of years later I was a zealous only slightly less clueless xmas abstainer. The advice given above is very good Joe; don't mess up like some of us have in the past.

Hey, that means I've been a Grinch for about 23 years now. We need a dancing banana Grinch!


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## Croghanite (Dec 20, 2006)

I will take heed to all the advice. Thanks for your prayers.


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## non dignus (Dec 20, 2006)

Joe,
It's not going to be easy but if you stick to the fifth commandment you'll do fine.


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## matthew11v25 (Dec 20, 2006)

Taking caution and choosing your battles is my advice. There are always going to be many issues/events that we battle as Reforming Christians. Beings that this conviction is fairly new and you are also under the roof of someone else's house, I would take it easy this year and prepare for the next. New convictions settle easy in one's heart, but can shock others, especially if the tradition is widely accepted. In general, I think successfully explaining one's views about Christmas is better approached before the holidays (so thoughts can simmer on both sides before gifts start getting wrapped).


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