# Older Women To Teach the Younger?



## JBaldwin (Sep 1, 2008)

What is this passage really teaching? 

_Titus 2:3-5 "Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."_

Recent discussions about women learning to do skills at home coupled with the recent sermons on marriage (from Genesis 2) at church have me thinking about this issue. 

Based on the sermons we've been listening to, marriage, as it was intended before the fall, was about two individuals of equal value, born of the same substance, yet with unique and different qualities, coming together. Both the woman and the man have weaknesses and strengths, and God intended for them to compliment one another. As scripture teaches elsewhere, in the same way that Christ is equal with the Father, but He submitted to the Father's will, the wife, equal with the husband, voluntarily submits to the husband. Because of the fall, we have a breakdown in this order. Christ died to restore that order. Each has different roles and respondsibilities. 

The reason I preface my comments with those in Genesis is because I think that a misunderstanding of God's intended roles in marraige confuses teaching elsewhere in Scripture regarding men's and women's roles in marriage. 

As I see it, feminism in the 60s and 70s destroyed whatever was left in society of the proper role of women in marriage and in the home. On the other hand, the reaction of the church (In my humble opinion) to feminism was equally devastating. Seeing women leave the home in droves left the church wondering what to do, and as a reaction, it over-reacted on the teaching of submission, encouraging men "to be leaders" and "take charge". The result is what I witnessed firsthand in fundamentalist and evangelical circles over balanced teaching on submission. 

As I see it, Titus' teaching on the role of older women is a solution to this problem. Having reached womanhood in the height of this (for want of a better word) "conflict" between the church and feminism, I experienced firsthand the struggles of wondering where in the world I fit in. The older women in my life were too busy finding their nitch in the business world, and the women my age were too busy finding careers to bother to learn how to be good wives (and believe me, it is a skill that must be learned, if it is to be done correctly). 

What I see in the church today (at least in my corner of the world) is women meeting together for women in the church meetings which consist of planning church dinners, baby and bridal showers, etc. I don't see a whole lot of older women teaching the younger ones how to be good wives and mothers. In fact, the older women are off doing their own things, while the younger women are struggling. 

How I wish when I first launched into marriage that some godly older woman had been there to teach me the skills of being a good wife. Instead, I have had to learn the hard way. While I am thankful for the lessons learned, it has given me a new zeal as an older woman to teach the younger what I have learned. 

So, what is this passage teaching in the context? In the church, shouldn't woman be teaching women? Why do we have so few (if any) women's classes?


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## JBaldwin (Sep 1, 2008)

One more thought on my post. When I say "be a good wife" I am not talking about keeping house, cooking, and doing domestic duties. I am talking about learning to be a good partner in marriage. Learning to be a support to a husband and still being submissive is a skill that is not easily learned.


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## Galatians220 (Sep 1, 2008)

JBaldwin said:


> One more thought on my post. When I say "be a good wife" I am not talking about keeping house, cooking, and doing domestic duties. I am talking about learning to be a good partner in marriage. Learning to be a support to a husband and still being submissive is a skill that is not easily learned.


 
*Amen!* Oh, is that ever not easily come by! I'm _still _trying to learn how to do that - and I've been married since the Polk administration! 

All I can do now is pray for the grace to do better in that area, the wisdom to recognize when/how to be submissive - and a good supply of duct tape for my mouth...  



 

Margarethttp://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/09/01/palin.daughter/index.html?eref=rss_topstories



http://www.sweetim.com/s.asp?im=gen&ref=12


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## JBaldwin (Sep 1, 2008)

Galatians220 said:


> JBaldwin said:
> 
> 
> > One more thought on my post. When I say "be a good wife" I am not talking about keeping house, cooking, and doing domestic duties. I am talking about learning to be a good partner in marriage. Learning to be a support to a husband and still being submissive is a skill that is not easily learned.
> ...





So true, and yet I think that hardest part for me is learning "how" to speak when it is necessary.


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## calgal (Sep 2, 2008)

JBaldwin said:


> Galatians220 said:
> 
> 
> > JBaldwin said:
> ...



My MIL has stepped into that role somewhat at least regarding handling her son.  I have had older women step in but the results were disastrous: almost all of them asked THE question: "Do you have KIDS?" A side note to ladies: please DO NOT ask that question of a childless couple: they could very well be infertile and that question hurts a LOT even if she manages to smile and make happy conversation. I do not look for a mentor any longer and just smile smile smile and am watching what I say. My comment to the next nosey parker: My dogs are not my idols: they are the ONLY kids we are likely to have and are helping us deal with that whole issue without too much angst thank you very much!


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## JBaldwin (Sep 2, 2008)

> My MIL has stepped into that role somewhat at least regarding handling her son.  I have had older women step in but the results were disastrous: almost all of them asked THE question: "Do you have KIDS?" A side note to ladies: please DO NOT ask that question of a childless couple: they could very well be infertile and that question hurts a LOT even if she manages to smile and make happy conversation. I do not look for a mentor any longer and just smile smile smile and am watching what I say. My comment to the next nosey parker: My dogs are not my idols: they are the ONLY kids we are likely to have and are helping us deal with that whole issue without too much angst thank you very much!



That can be a delicate topic, though I wasn't thinking so much of child-rearing (even though that is covered in the Scripture text mentioned), I am thinking more about the role of being a good wife which primarily entails a wife's relationship with her husband.


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## Roldan (Sep 2, 2008)

You ladies are awesome!!!!


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