# Sabbath Restrictions and toddlers 4-6 yrs old



## Anton Bruckner (Mar 5, 2007)

For the parents with children, what do you permit and not permit them to engage in on the Sabbath? Are they allowed to play? And if so, what are they allowed to play or not?


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## jenney (Mar 5, 2007)

Well, I guess I'll just be the first to jump in here!

First, you should know a little about my family:

I have six daughters ages 11 down to 16 months with no twins. We've had these guidelines for our Lord's Day since the oldest was about four or five years old.
That means we've been through the "4-6 years old" stage with the first four children, one of them is still being in that stage. Not a lot of experience, so take it with that limitation in mind. I also have "sitters"--they like to sit and do activities. They don't need to run about as much as some kids do. your mileage may vary!

We have, for the most part, been in circles where most of the other families had similar rules for their children which makes it easier to enforce.

We love the Lord's Day. It is a great opportunity to feed my soul, to spend concerted time focusing my heart on the Lord, His Word and His people. And I get to spend it with my favorite people, my husband and daughters. I love it and I need it to get through the week, and our goal for our children is that they would love it from the heart, not just obey outwardly by doing the right things and avoiding the wrong things in a legalistic (i.e. meritorious) way. We watch our actions, sure, but we also watch our words and our hearts. I can't see the children's hearts, but I am very careful to let them know why we do/don't spend the day as we do so that they don't see it as just a day where we "don't do anything fun". At young ages, it seems the day is special because we are all together.

That said, here's what we do:

Generally, by the time mine hit about five we don't let them play games. That's in general.

What do we do instead?
It is the only day of the week where we eat dessert. I'm a dedicated dessert-maker and we take advantage of that on the Lord's Day. It makes the day sweet!

Since i also have older than age six, we have some activities I do with the olders that the younger ones just join in on. We usually spend the whole day at church, so after lunch they nap in one of the classrooms with my husband (he might sleep but often he reads or prays) while the older girls and I have a Bible study and talk about issues they have of concern. These activities are for after the nappers wake up.

They include the following:

We talk about spiritual things. We ask about Sunday School. We read our sermon notes with the older girls and try, as a group, to reconstruct the sermon from them. We summarize for the younger ones.

We memorize Bible verses. I have a handwriting font with lines that I use to type them up and the little girls copy them (from about age four up) I don't have the older ones do this because they use them for their handwriting practice during the week and it is their regular work, plus it's not very enthralling the way it is for the littles who see it as a special treat to copy verses. 

I'm an artist (a poor one!) and I do pen and ink drawings for them to color. My older three just made little Bible study books based on the Prov. 31 woman with each verse written out and a picture to color. The little girls color these and try to figure out what the verse says.

We memorize catechism Q's and A's. We go over the questions in an enthusiastic way, including sometimes awarding prizes for besting their previous record number of memorized q&a's.

I read a Bible story and they act out the characters.

Because they have a hard time sitting through the evening service, we often go for a walk in the neighborhood to give them a chance to expend some energy. The rest of us talk and make efforts to keep our minds on things of God.

My eight year old likes to lead a hymn sing for all interested family members (usually that would be everyone) and even the littlest participates in that (though she can't enunciate any words besides the Amen at the end.) 

We read Bible stories, Christian books and missionary biographies.

We do craft activities that revolve around Bible themes. We'll study the ark and try to make a copy of it. We once did a study on what a million is so that we could talk about God being infinite (did you know that if you count one number per second and count all through the day and night without stopping that you won't get to a million for 11 _days_?) We have drawn plans for the temple and tabernacle, we've made a family tree for Abraham through Noah, we have used pastels and watercolors and made pretty background papers for writing memory verses.

We make cards for family and friends whom we want to encourage. The little girls color pictures on the front and sometimes copy things onto the inside.

We used to visit my invalid Gramma at her nursing home. We encouraged her, read the Bible to her and sang hymns. After she died my girls missed that incredibly.

We clean up the church after everyone has left between services. The little girls can sweep, pick up trash (tissues, candy wrappers, paper scraps) and they can wipe of tables and put hymnals and Bibles back in the pews.

It takes some planning and preparation. A good resource for us was Pam Forster's Call the Sabbath a Delight available from her family's website, Doorposts.

It is really the best day of the week for us, even the littlest ones, who see it as a chance to especially be with Daddy and get lots of attention from those of us who are busy with school and chores the rest of the week!

That is a long answer. Sorry. I'm trying to be thorough! I'll probably think of even more later!  

~jenney


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## Dieter Schneider (Mar 5, 2007)

Perhaps you need to use your God-given common sense since Scripture does not give us a list. I do not think this is an area where the conscience may be bound. 
I think that Bible quizzes / games can be helpful (or even talking about the sermon), but I personally see nothing wrong with exploring creation. I once was told by a Sabbatarian not to trample the Sabbath under foot. I chose not to reply so as to to cause any offense. 
What about reading Christian biographies or watching Christian videos? I think parents ought to spend time with their children – together. We ought NOT to raise our children in a way that leaves the impression that the LORD'S DAY (my preferred term) is to be endured rather than to be enjoyed. It was made for man's benefit not burden. 
I also think it is good to invite unconverted friends / church visitors. It always is more blessed to give than to receive. 
Notwithstanding, I do not think it ought to be the busiest day of the week. 
Whatever you decide upon I hope you will manage to steer a clear path between legalism and Antinomianism. Every blessing.


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## ChristopherPaul (Mar 5, 2007)

Keon:

This is a good question, but you may want to restrict the responses to those who do not take exceptions to the reformed confessions on this issue or you may end up with an unwanted debate.


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## bwsmith (Mar 5, 2007)

I agree with Jenny - Ask God to show you how to make the Sabbath a delight.

The Sabbath – was made for man – so that he might worship, adore, and enjoy God is the side I am on! 

In a culture that has not use for God, taking one day a week, and resting in HIS care is an increasingly neat trick. Business insist on work weeks of 8-10 day s with 4 off – sports programs for kids schedule all events for 10:45 AM SUNDAY – and with the diminution of “blue laws” we can shop truly until we drop! 

Rarely is one’s ox in a ditch 24/7, esp. in the USA, so permitting GOD to care for us, who do not have the daily chores Israel faced just to survive is not hard! Yet the free time a *Sabbath* day affords is frittered away, or snatched away by conflicting demands. 

Once I read a book on making the Sabbath – for us that is Sunday – so wonderful that folks would be talking about the blessedness of that day until Wednesday – and so excited about its prospect, that they would begin planning for it of Thursday. 

Over the years we were stricter about keeping conflicts out of our family’s *Sabbath* – but I would get the food in, and we purposed not to shop, even avoided restaurants, and asked the kids to forgo routine sports, and threw open out home to hospitality, feeding several midshipmen after church, took a nap, and then we carried a worship service to a nursing home before enjoying fellowship Sunday night at church . . .


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## LadyFlynt (Mar 5, 2007)

Appropriate reading material, colouring/drawing, Scripture knowledge/learning games. We want their focus to be on the Lord and lessons from Scripture. We also enjoy singing on this day.


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## MrMerlin777 (Mar 5, 2007)

Dieter Schneider said:


> Perhaps you need to use your God-given common sense since Scripture does not give us a list. I do not think this is an area where the conscience may be bound.
> I think that Bible quizzes / games can be helpful (or even talking about the sermon), but I personally see nothing wrong with exploring creation. I once was told by a Sabbatarian not to trample the Sabbath under foot. I chose not to reply so as to to cause any offense.
> What about reading Christian biographies or watching Christian videos? I think parents ought to spend time with their children – together. We ought NOT to raise our children in a way that leaves the impression that the LORD'S DAY (my preferred term) is to be endured rather than to be enjoyed. It was made for man's benefit not burden.
> I also think it is good to invite unconverted friends / church visitors. It always is more blessed to give than to receive.
> ...



Good post.


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## No Longer A Libertine (Mar 5, 2007)

Although I'm not a sabbatarian, I guess if you were to practice such you would go ahead and enforce it always, no need for a reformed age of accountability.


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## Anton Bruckner (Mar 5, 2007)

thanks for the response guys. I'm at a loss as to what to do after church after I do the catechism and the Bible story. I find myself struggling to come up with meaningful activities for the rest of the day, and then I succumb to the pleadings for the video game


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## Michael (Mar 5, 2007)

Slippery said:


> For the parents with children, what do you permit and not permit them to engage in on the Sabbath? Are they allowed to play? And if so, what are they allowed to play or not?



Occassionally, but only _occassionally_ I'd consider letting them maybe pick some heads of grain in the field. I know, it's a stretch.



Oh and then there's Mark 2:27



Just kidding. Let em' play and glorify God in doing so.


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## govols (Mar 6, 2007)

Michael,

Everyone knows everyone at your church I bet. Play off of the city.


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Mar 6, 2007)

Slippery said:


> thanks for the response guys. I'm at a loss as to what to do after church after I do the catechism and the Bible story. I find myself struggling to come up with meaningful activities for the rest of the day, and then I succumb to the pleadings for the video game



Keon -- You might consider some of the "Sabbath box" ideas suggested by Jay in this thread.


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## ChristopherPaul (Mar 6, 2007)

Ezekiel16 said:


> Occassionally, but only _occassionally_ I'd consider letting them maybe pick some heads of grain in the field. I know, it's a stretch.




Sure, as long as they are with Christ, why not?

(kiddin' back)


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## bwsmith (Mar 6, 2007)

LadyFlynt said:


> Appropriate reading material, colouring/drawing, Scripture knowledge/learning games. We want their focus to be on the Lord and lessons from Scripture. We also enjoy singing on this day.



We also practiced hospitality -- having a meal ready -- no small trick -- to share with folks after worship -- and as God enabled we carried a worship service to a nursing home.


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## Pergamum (Mar 6, 2007)

We worship and then we PLAY HARD!!! Making sure to try not to get engaged in unneccessary secular work.


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## jenney (Mar 6, 2007)

I thought everybody here at PB agreed with the confession, which is clearly of the Lord's Day Sabbath opinion. It will never cease to amaze me that some of the very same people who will FIGHT HARD for the continued covenant of grace demonstrated _in baptism_ will throw out the fourth commandment like dispensationalists.

We have the same "rules" for our children as we have for ourselves, as laid out in the confession:
mercy, necessity and piety. What constitutes those? Rarely, if ever, eating in a restaurant, grocery shopping, playing soccer, etc. But I won't quibble with a brother or a sister who says, "look, I _need_ half & half in my coffee, so I'm going to WinnDixie, Sunday or not!" Whether that is a need/mercy/act of piety is really between that person and his/her master. Before Him, we stand or fall.

I only answered the question because it was asked. I'm sorry if my family seems legalistic and uptight, but we, too, must stand or fall before the Lord and if you spent it with us you probably wouldn't see long faces or rolled eyes at _another_ Sunday to "endure".

I was trying to be clear about it being the best day of the week _because of the Lord_. If we can't call it a delight without a volleyball game in the park, then I can't help but wonder if we have made an idol out of our pleasure, as per Isaiah 58.

Sorry if I'm seeming defensive. It has been a tremendous grief for me that the day that should be the highlight of the week is, in the minds of some, a huge burden that we are forcing on ourselves and our family.  

~jenney


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## LadyFlynt (Mar 6, 2007)

bwsmith said:


> We also practiced hospitality -- having a meal ready -- no small trick -- to share with folks after worship -- and as God enabled we carried a worship service to a nursing home.



We generally bring food to eat after services...several of us are traveling distances. We do however, invite those near us for supper and fellowship during the week.


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## Ezekiel3626 (Mar 6, 2007)

jenney said:


> Well, I guess I'll just be the first to jump in here!
> 
> First, you should know a little about my family:
> 
> ...





jenney said:


> I thought everybody here at PB agreed with the confession, which is clearly of the Lord's Day Sabbath opinion. It will never cease to amaze me that some of the very same people who will FIGHT HARD for the continued covenant of grace demonstrated _in baptism_ will throw out the fourth commandment like dispensationalists.
> 
> We have the same "rules" for our children as we have for ourselves, as laid out in the confession:
> mercy, necessity and piety. What constitutes those? Rarely, if ever, eating in a restaurant, grocery shopping, playing soccer, etc. But I won't quibble with a brother or a sister who says, "look, I _need_ half & half in my coffee, so I'm going to WinnDixie, Sunday or not!" Whether that is a need/mercy/act of piety is really between that person and his/her master. Before Him, we stand or fall.
> ...


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## lv1nothr (Mar 6, 2007)

jenney said:


> I thought everybody here at PB agreed with the confession, which is clearly of the Lord's Day Sabbath opinion. It will never cease to amaze me that some of the very same people who will FIGHT HARD for the continued covenant of grace demonstrated _in baptism_ will throw out the fourth commandment like dispensationalists.
> 
> We have the same "rules" for our children as we have for ourselves, as laid out in the confession:
> mercy, necessity and piety. What constitutes those? Rarely, if ever, eating in a restaurant, grocery shopping, playing soccer, etc. But I won't quibble with a brother or a sister who says, "look, I _need_ half & half in my coffee, so I'm going to WinnDixie, Sunday or not!" Whether that is a need/mercy/act of piety is really between that person and his/her master. Before Him, we stand or fall.
> ...



Jenney,  here! 
We so delight in that day and so do our children. We see that they know that it is a day set apart for the Lord, He gave it to us knowing we would probably not do it ourselves. May the Lord continue to bless you and yours!


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## Pergamum (Mar 7, 2007)

Most here would agree that the Lord's Day is a perpetual Sabbath. But, being freed from the civil state how we honor this day is world's apart from OT Israel or even how some of the old Scottish believers did. We honor the day by spending it in worshipping and enjoying family. Anything we do must be done to cultivate an internal worship out of love and joy and not a religion that delights in adding rules above the basic abiding principles that ought to govern our sabbth keeping. I really haven't heard anyone profaning the sabbath here in this post. 

We try to play vigorusly after worship and I usually then go hike a nearby mountain and listen to sermons while I do. Of course, if we have unexpected guest we think nothing of throwing rice into the rice cooker or food into the microwave (is the microwave "work"?).... It is no effort on our part.


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## jenney (Mar 7, 2007)

You're right Trevor. 

I think I am being too sensitive and reading into things.

Please forgive me everyone for being easily offended. In some ways, I really see myself as the weaker, err, "brother".

~jenney


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## Pergamum (Mar 7, 2007)

Jenney; Your zeal for God's Word is to be commended, Brother!


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