# Thought I'd let y'all know that my much loved husband, Don, died yesterday.



## Gryphonette (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm sorry I haven't been around this autumn. Didn't mean to just stop coming, but what with one thing and another - including going back to work at JCPenney - I really shrank the number of places I visited to just a few, and those places that didn't have a whole lot of threads with which to keep up.

Basically Don was told on Nov. 13 that he had pneumonia, based upon his chest x-ray (taken due to a bad cough he'd had for about a month). 

Eight days later he'd not only not improved but had worsened, so he and the doctor decided to stick him in the hospital for tests to be run to figure out what was causing the pneumonia, and to mainline antibiotics. This was on Friday, the 21st.

That night he was moved to the ICU, just as a precaution and so his blood oxygen levels could be monitored closely. "He probably doesn't need to be here," I was assured by a respiratory tech.

Apparently the x-ray taken after he was admitted showed his lungs had worsened exponentially in the intervening eight days. It'd been bad on the 13th, but was really ghastly on the 21st. The doctors, including pulmonary specialists, still thought it was pneumonia. Growing that fast? Had to be!

On Sunday - a week ago today - he had a bronchioscopy (sp?) after which he was on a ventilator and heavily sedated. He remained that way until yesterday.

On Tuesday I was told cancer had been found but they couldn't distinguish the pneumonia from the cancer so didn't know how extensive it was. First the pneumonia would be treated with steroids beginning the next day, and once it was gone we'd see what we were dealing with.

On Wednesday I was told there was no pneumonia, it was all cancer, and Don's condition was terminal.

On Friday the Navy moved heaven and earth and got Alex and his family home from Japan. Bless the Navy's unstinting efforts! People came in on Thanksgiving night and worked through what was supposed to be their day off, i.e. the day after Thanksgiving, to make this happen. Alex said they were still in the office when he and Beth and the girls left Yokosuka for the Tokyo airport.

Yesterday the decision was made to remove Don's ventilator tube after it was revealed that he had cancer (poorly differentiated adenocarcinoma) in his lungs (with the right lobe almost wholly given over to it), his chest cavity, his lymph nodes, and his blood. They suspect it'd reached his kidneys and/or liver, too, but didn't run tests to see. No point.

It took just a little over two hours for him to die. During that time I was with him, as were his six children and two brothers. We prayed, told him how much we loved him, and took turns reading from Scripture. It was a blessedly peaceful death for my sweetheart. Praise God for that!

God has dealt with us so kindly and lovingly it's almost impossible to fathom. I've praised Him more this past week than I've ever done in my life, marveling at His perfect outworking of His plan, and seeing His hand guiding the process.

Many years ago Kirstin, our eldest daughter, took nursing classes, though she decided against finishing. She remembered enough to ask questions I'd not think about, and was a terrific liasion with the medical staff for me.

Almost a year ago two of Dmitry's close friends from Russia came to live with us. I don't know what I'd have done without them here to support Dmitry and help out.

In late July Don got a new job where he was able to office out of our home. This meant we all got to see more of him. What a huge blessing that proved to be!

In September my father's health took a downturn so Alex flew home for a week to see him, fearing his grandfather would be gone by the time he separated from the Navy next summer. Turns out it was actually his father he wasn't going to see again. We had no idea but, naturally, the LORD did, and generously allowed Don and Alex to spend time together.

The medical staff was wholly taken aback by the cancer diagnosis. Considering Don's healthy condition - barring the cough and shortness of breath - they said there was no way any doctor would look at those x-rays and think "cancer." Don should, by rights, have been ill for weeks and months before now, instead of which on the Saturday prior to his death he was able to sit up and watch football, chatting with visitors. Amazing kindness on the part of the LORD, to have spared Don the suffering tht should have accompanied this disease.

Don never suffered, nor even knew he had cancer.

He'd have been miserable had he known. I'm so glad he didn't. Thank you, LORD. Thank you.

I'm numb, pretty much. Wednesday and Thursday were really hard as I grasped that the LORD was taking Don away.

But when the time came that he died, I felt not much of anything, and still just cry a little occasionally. A friend whose husband died of cancer a few years ago said she did the same, but eventually the pain will hit.

Oh boy. 

Prayers for me and our children and the rest of those who loved him - and they are legion! - would be appreciated, as we learn to reorder our lives and live without he who was our go-to guy for almost everything.

Thanks.


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## Nate (Nov 30, 2008)

What a great testimony you've given. We are praying for you and yours.


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## Galatians220 (Nov 30, 2008)

Dearest Anne,

*Oh, my dear sister in Christ, I am so sorry...* Words fail...

May our precious Lord and Savior comfort you and all your family; may He hold you all close and always let you know and feel that He's right there, with you, *for He most certainly is.*

My prayers are with you and for you now, and they will remain, in a constant stream, over these next days and weeks.



 

"Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints..." - Psalm 116:15.

Love in Christ,

Margaret

http://www.sweetim.com/s.asp?im=gen&lpver=3&ref=12


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## Pergamum (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Anne,

Wow, what a shock.

Very, very sad and yet encouraging due to your words and testimony. I do not know what else to say. So so so very sorry. 

May the Lord uphold you and your family.

TJ


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## APuritansMind (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying for you and your family.


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## turmeric (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm very nearly speechless! Praying for you and your family, may the Lord comfort you!


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## Scott Bushey (Nov 30, 2008)

Ann,
I know you don't know me but I was a person of this board a few years ago. Your situation and post has been the only moving factor for me posting again. I have read many of your posts in the past; all of them being highly seasoned w/ grace and wisdom. In light of your situation, I can only say that I and my family will pray for you. I would offer scripture applicable to your situation though I know you are aware of all those passages that will be your foundation for the coming days, months and years. Praise God for His Spirit, your extended family, your church and the family that you have here @ PB as they will be your support in this time of grief.


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## timmopussycat (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying that our Lord continues to uphold you and yours. He will continue to help you all walk through this time.


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## Jerusalem Blade (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm so sorry, Anne. Praying for you and yours.

Steve


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## Leslie (Nov 30, 2008)

Thanks for telling the whole story. It is an encouragement to see how God's support works out in practical ways during our trials.


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## satz (Nov 30, 2008)

Prayed.

I am sorry to hear this.


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## Ginny Dohms (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, I am SO sorry to hear of your tragic loss. I can only imagine what you are going through, and will continue to go through in the coming days. Thank you for sharing your testimony of God's mercy and grace. May God continue to grant you peace as you walk through this valley, and may He comfort you with His strong arms of love. 

I'll be praying for you and your family.


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## BJClark (Nov 30, 2008)

Oh Anne, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I will certainly be praying for you and yours..


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## TimV (Nov 30, 2008)

Oh, Anne! Last week I prayed for you from the few things you said on Facebook. May God specially bless those in the Navy for what they did. May there be no recriminations between your family and the doctors. May it not be numbness that you feel but that unreasonable, unfathomable peace from God.


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## panta dokimazete (Nov 30, 2008)

weeping and praying now, dear sister - richest blessings and peace in this time...


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## jambo (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne

I am so sorry to hear of your loss and was moved by what you wrote. It must be a great comfort for you to know the Lord's presence at this time and to have traced his hand of providence through this. Words are difficult at this time but be assured of my thoughts and prayers for you and the family.


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## Notthemama1984 (Nov 30, 2008)

ing for you, your family, and all those affected by this loss.


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## Ezekiel3626 (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, you are truly a blessed lady. You and I joined within a few days of each other, and I have read most of your posts since then. As stated before, the Lord has given you a gift for saying what needed to be said, and doing it with wisdom and grace. I am so very sorry for your loss, and we will pray for you and your family, that the Lord continue to uphold and comfort you in the days to come.


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## Theoretical (Nov 30, 2008)

Wow, I'm truly sorry, Anne. Praying for you and your family.


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## Presbyterian Deacon (Nov 30, 2008)




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## ReformedWretch (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm shocked here as well having read your comments on facebook as well praying that this was simply the beginning of a process (a terrible one but still just the beginning). I marvel at your strength in and through this, pray for you earnestly, and cannot state how sorry I am for your loss.


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## JonathanHunt (Nov 30, 2008)

God bless you all, Anne. Your post is quite beautiful.

I'm so glad to hear of the US Navy 'moving heaven and earth' for your dear ones. I used to work in precisely the same job for the British Armed Forces and it is lovely to hear of the same thing happening in other countries' armed forces.

With love, in Christ

Jonathan


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## NaphtaliPress (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm so sadden by this and am praying for you and your family Anne that the Lord of all comfort would continue to be yours and theirs, Who also has already clearly as you have related, worked wonderfully in the circumstances of Don's brief illness and sudden passing. And may all this be not just an amazement to the doctors and all those who have witnessed it, but a testimony to the goodness of the Lord who is our only hope, comfort and salvation.


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## CDM (Nov 30, 2008)




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## kvanlaan (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Anne,

I'm so sorry to hear this. I had wondered where you had been, as I'd not seen you posting much at all. Please accept our deepest condolences and know that we will be praying.

With all our love,
Kevin and family.


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## py3ak (Nov 30, 2008)

I am sorry to hear of your loss, Anne. But it was a great way to enter into glory. The God of all comfort be your constant portion.


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## a mere housewife (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Anne, I cried to hear that your husband passed away (but with so much of God's lovingkindness around him and you all); but I know that his life is only more vivid and intense in the joy of God's presence. I pray that as you shared his sorrows here God will give you a share in his joy now.

I have been comforted by the truths in this poem by Rosetti in the past. I thought of it again thinking of your husband in eternal joy. You are very precious to us Anne and will be in my thoughts through these days.

I am sure others might also like to know when you are able: is there an address to which we could send a card for you and your family?

It is not death, O Christ, to die for Thee:
Nor is that silence of a silent land
Which speaks Thy praise so all may understand:
Darkness of death makes Thy dear lovers see
Thyself Who Wast and Art and Art to Be;
Thyself, more lovely than the lovely band
Of saints who worship Thee on either hand,
Loving and loved thro' all eternity.
Death is not death, and therefore do I hope:
Nor silence silence, and I therefore sing . . .


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## Pilgrim72 (Nov 30, 2008)

Your post brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing.

May the Lord bless and comfort you and your family.


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## Redaimie (Nov 30, 2008)

I am so very sorry, I was very sad to hear of your loss, you have been in my prayers. May God grant you much strength.


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## LadyFlynt (Nov 30, 2008)

Many, many gentle hugs and prayers, Anne. I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Nov 30, 2008)

Galatians220 said:


> "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints..." - Psalm 116:15.



 Weeping with you, and rejoicing with you, sister. May the peace of God which surpasses all understanding be with you and yours.


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## asc (Nov 30, 2008)

Thank you for sharing this with us.
Praying for you and your family.


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## Semper Fidelis (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying, Sister. I don't know what else to do. Weeping mostly over your grief.

I'm so sorry. Death is an enemy and, even though vanquished, still causes us much sadness.


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## Casey (Nov 30, 2008)




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## christiana (Nov 30, 2008)

I wept through your post, so touching and full of grace and peace at heart, which is my prayer for you and yours! You are blest to have such a beautiful supportive group of family and friends! I join them in praying for your guidance throughout the coming while!
God bless and comfort!!


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## Herald (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear sister, I am praying for you and your family. May you know the 
comfort of the Lord and the love of the saints.


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## jaybird0827 (Nov 30, 2008)

Please accept our condolences.
May the Lord surround you with the sweet comforts of his grace.


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## Wannabee (Nov 30, 2008)

Well said Anne. Thank you for sharing and encouraging us with your unwaivering love and faith. What a wonderful testimony of the work of Christ, and His faithfulness.


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## Prufrock (Nov 30, 2008)

You and yours will surely be in my prayers.


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## Mushroom (Nov 30, 2008)

Oh, dearest sister, may our God hold you all closely in the hollow of His hand during this bittersweet providence! We're praying and weeping with you here. We have missed your kind wisdom, but now we know where it was needed more. The Lord bless you with abundant comfort, Anne, you and all your dear family.


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## 21st Century Calvinist (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Sister,
Thank you so much for sharing this. You write so beautifully. I am saddened for you in your sudden and unexpected loss. It is always painful when the Lord takes from us someone we are not ready to let go. Yet God understands your grief and pain. May you cling to Him and may He comfort you above and beyond what you can imagine. Praying for you all.


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## SolaScriptura (Nov 30, 2008)

I am so sorry about the suddenness of this, but I am glad that your husband was able to enjoy his life to the end. May our Lord comfort you and your family in this time... and may you look with anticipation to That Day when you shall again see your husband.


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## Devin (Nov 30, 2008)

Our hearts break with your's, but we rejoice that your husband was ready. I'll definitely be praying for you.


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## Ivan (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Anne,

During your time of great loss your testimony brings hope and encouragement to us all. I thank God for His grace and peace that has been extended to you. It tells us that we too, in our hour of need, which will surely come to all of us one day, that we will find the same thing. 

Your loss is heaven's gain. Your husband is now in the presence of Jesus, his LORD and Savior. There is no better place to be in the whole universe. One day we will reside in that good place and reign with Jesus for eternity. Oh for that day to come!

I will pray for you and your dear family.


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## kalawine (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying for you Anne.  From your testimony the LORD has given you much grace in your sorrow.  Please don't stay away too long.  

Psalm 116:15 

15 Precious in the sight of the Lord
is the death of his saints. (ESV)


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## nicnap (Nov 30, 2008)

The Lord bless thee and keep thee; the Lord make His face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee; the Lord lift up His countenance upon thee and give thee peace.

Blessings, dear sister; you are in my family's prayers.


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## DMcFadden (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne,

Wow! I am also nearly speechless. Your news hit like a blow. Your testimony in the midst of such grief is an amazing testimony to God's grace and sufficiency. May his love enfold you in the days ahead. As Rich said, the last enemey is vanquished eschatalogically, but is certainly able to turn our lives upside down in the here and now. You will be in my prayers!

The Lord bless you!


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## Beth Ellen Nagle (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, sorry to hear of your loss and praise God for his tender mercies towards you all in those last days. My prayers are with you and yours.


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## AThornquist (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm very sorry for your loss... But thankfully, we can rest assured that it is our good God who gives and takes away. May the presence of the Lord bring you the fullness of joy even in this tragic time.


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## toddpedlar (Nov 30, 2008)

our prayers are with you, dear sister. May the God of all comfort and peace be with you as you go forward from this day.


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## Craig (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying for you and your family. God's peace be with you...and His strength.


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## shackleton (Nov 30, 2008)




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## Richard King (Nov 30, 2008)

Mrs. Ivy
Your testimony touched me deeply.
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this.
I will remember you in prayer sister and on this Wednesday when the men from my church
meet to pray together we will be praying for you.
Please keep us posted on how you are doing.


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## BobVigneault (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear sweet Anne, I'm shocked. I'm so very sorry. You are in our prayers. Let us know if we can do anything besides pray for you. Jude 24,25


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## Scott1 (Nov 30, 2008)

Very sorry to hear about all this.

It's hard to know what to say, but thank you for sharing this and I'm praying for you right now.


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## Confessor (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne,

I know that you do not know me very well, but I just want to let you know how impacting your (and God's) grace showed through your testimony. Your husband left you within a month of the first diagnosis, and rather than be angry for your husband's sudden departure, you praised Christ for making his ascension so quick and painless! Oh dearest sister, this is just an inexplicably beautiful display of God's love through you, and I am weeping for you, both in joy and grief. May God continue to bless you.

Sola Gratia,
Ben


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## Backwoods Presbyterian (Nov 30, 2008)




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## historyb (Nov 30, 2008)

I am sorry to hear  Our prayers are with you and your family.


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## Barnpreacher (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne,

I am weeping now and praying for you and yours.

I was strengthened and encouraged as I read the power of the Lord working through you during this time. I wish I could encourage you during this time in just a small portion of the way you have encouraged me by reading your post. 

God bless, sis. I am so sorry.


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## Marrow Man (Nov 30, 2008)




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## VictorBravo (Nov 30, 2008)

God be with you and yours, Anne. We are praying for your comfort and strength. Praise God for your witness.


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## he beholds (Nov 30, 2008)

We will keep you and your family in our prayers. Thank you for sharing your sorrow with us, as well as your joy. 
jessi


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## Augusta (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, God be with you during this sad time. I had to explain why I was crying to my hubby.  Your post was so moving and just thinking about the suddenness of the whole thing. I know that it will hit you at some point and I pray that the God of all comfort would draw near to you when it does. He is our only comfort in life and death.

Praying for you and yours.


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## Kevin (Nov 30, 2008)

I am so sorry. My you know the love of Christ in the coming days.


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## jfschultz (Nov 30, 2008)




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## JBaldwin (Nov 30, 2008)

Ann, so sorry to hear of your loss. Thanks for sharing all the details. We will be praying for you in the months to come.


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## Southern Presbyterian (Nov 30, 2008)

Praying for your peace and comfort, dear Sister!


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## Zenas (Nov 30, 2008)

I'm choking back tears in the middle of the student lounge.


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## Ex Nihilo (Nov 30, 2008)

Thank you for sharing your testimony and for your example of faith. You are in my prayers.


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## Theogenes (Nov 30, 2008)

Dear Anne,
I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. May our Heavenly Father comfort you as only He can. You and your family will be in my prayers.
Jim


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## Theognome (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, 

You, yours and 'legion' shall be in our prayers.


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## Contra_Mundum (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne,
I am grieved for your loss. Other friends have already said more loving things than I can. Here is one of my favorite hymns. And some Scripture.
Grace and Peace to you from God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ.


May the mind of Christ, my Savior, 
live in me from day to day, 
by his love and power controlling 
all I do and say. 
(Phil.2:5; 1Cor.2:16)

May the word of God dwell richly 
in my heart from hour to hour, 
so that all may see I triumph 
only through his power.
(Col.3:16; 2Cor.12:9-10)

May the peace of God, my Father, 
rule my life in everything, 
that I may be calm to comfort 
sick and sorrowing. 
(Col.3:15; 2Cor.1:4)

May the love of Jesus fill me 
as the waters fill the sea. 
Him exalting, self abasing: 
this is victory. 
(Eph.3:19; Rom.8:35-37)

May we run the race before us, 
strong and brave to face the foe, 
looking only unto Jesus 
as we onward go.
(Heb.12:1-2)

Kate B. Wilkinson (1925)


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## ww (Nov 30, 2008)

Dearest Anne, 

I can't even imagine the grief you are experiencing and will experience as the result of Don's Death. Your Testimony of Events is utterly shocking and yet you see God's Hand in it in spite of your personal loss. My heart grieves for you and my prayers are earnestly offered on your behalf. May His Comfort and Peace be yours during this difficult time. Having all this happen around the Thanksgiving Holiday is especially difficult and Christmas will be a most difficult time for you. My Wife and I will be praying for you especially this Holiday Season. Although I've never met you personally I have seen your sweet spirit come through in many posts over the years and if there is anything my wife or I can do for you please don't hesitate to let us know. 

God Bless You!


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## Matthew1034 (Nov 30, 2008)

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.


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## Grymir (Nov 30, 2008)

Anne, May God be with you through this time and make Himself known.


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## Blue Tick (Dec 1, 2008)

Praying sister. May the Lord comfort you and your family during this time of need.


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## Tim (Dec 1, 2008)

May you be under the shadow of His wings.


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## Rev. Todd Ruddell (Dec 1, 2008)

Dear Anne, 

Love and sympathy from our family to yours. If there's something we can do, please let us know. We're just around the corner here in Dallas. 

With much love and care in Christ,


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## DavidinKnoxville (Dec 1, 2008)

What a great testimony Anne. Thanks


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## R. Scott Clark (Dec 1, 2008)

Will pray for grace and peace in the days and months to come.


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## Jimmy the Greek (Dec 1, 2008)

NateLanning said:


> What a great testimony you've given. We are praying for you and yours.



Ditto.


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## Spinningplates2 (Dec 1, 2008)

May the Grace of our loving God cover you like a warm blanket.


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## SueS (Dec 1, 2008)

I'm so terribly sorry for your loss but am amazed at the blessings which accompanied it. "We are not as those without hope" is proved to be true time and again. My prayers are with you and your family.


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## wsw201 (Dec 1, 2008)




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## KMK (Dec 1, 2008)

I'm sorry.

Thank you for edifying me with your testimony.


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## MrMerlin777 (Dec 1, 2008)

My condolences and my deepest sympathy to you and yours.


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## Bygracealone (Dec 1, 2008)

Praying with the rest of the saints here for grace upon grace to be given to you now and in the difficult times ahead of you. 

Thank you for sharing this with us. God has been glorified...


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## MW (Dec 1, 2008)

Anne, we are all praying for you at this time of deep sorrow, and trust the eternal God will be your refuge and make you to feel the everlasting arms that are underneath you.


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## Gage Browning (Dec 1, 2008)

*Praying*

I am so terribly sorry. I'm praying for you now.


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## ADKing (Dec 2, 2008)

Dear Sister,

I have little to add to what many have said. But please be assured I have prayed for you already and will continue to do so.


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## LawrenceU (Dec 2, 2008)

We are praying for you.


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## DTK (Dec 2, 2008)

So very sorry to hear of your loss. May our Lord be pleased to communicate His comforting grace to you and yours, both now and in the days to come.

DTK


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## Blueridge Believer (Dec 2, 2008)

Rev 7:11 And all the angels stood round about the throne, and [about] the elders and the four beasts, and fell before the throne on their faces, and worshipped God, 
Rev 7:12 Saying, Amen: Blessing, and glory, and wisdom, and thanksgiving, and honour, and power, and might, [be] unto our God for ever and ever. Amen. 
Rev 7:13 And one of the elders answered, saying unto me, What are these which are arrayed in white robes? and whence came they? 
Rev 7:14 And I said unto him, Sir, thou knowest. And he said to me, These are they which came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes, and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. 
Rev 7:15 Therefore are they before the throne of God, and serve him day and night in his temple: and he that sitteth on the throne shall dwell among them. 
Rev 7:16 They shall hunger no more, neither thirst any more; neither shall the sun light on them, nor any heat. 
Rev 7:17 For the Lamb which is in the midst of the throne shall feed them, and shall lead them unto living fountains of waters: and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes.


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## caddy (Dec 2, 2008)

God bless you and keep you dear sister.


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## Dearly Bought (Dec 2, 2008)




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## Jon Lake (Dec 2, 2008)

I am new and all, but I am sorry for your loss all the same.


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