# Need opinions on reaching children/teens



## ReformedWretch (Aug 17, 2009)

Ok, I have been in the very early planning stages of creating a "Christian system" for residential childcare. As most/many of you know I was a professional childcare worker (House Parent) for fifteen years and LOVED it, but saw many flaws and a blatant anti-biblical at worst, or a terribly weak theology based at best system behind the attempts to "help" children in need.

Without getting into all of it, or the entire story as to "why" I am pursuing this I need to run by you all here my general intake/interview ideas. This is the process used by nearly all childcare places that accept needy children/teens. I feel a true "Christian" one, run by the local Church, should be based on these ideas. Let me know what you think.

A child that is brought to one of our homes (my prayer is that I could start MANY of these in Churches all over the Country) would be told just what a Christian is, what the expectations of a Christian home (family) are. The would be required to do/follow things such as attending Church Sunday morning, evening and mid week, daily prayer and devotions, Christian counseling in regard to their issues/problems, and the rules of the home would be decided upon by the Christian parents of that home and must be followed (these would be reviewed by the administration before being put in place but the child need not know that). Parents of the children placed in care would be required to go to Christian family services (counseling) chosen by our facility, and would have to meet for prayer and devotions with the staff and children before ANY visits at the home, or taking their child out for visits. They would be required to do this again before leaving the home or after dropping their child off at the home. If the parent could not make it to the home, these sessions would happen over speaker phone or web cam.

What I am looking to do is bring in needy/hurt/abused/neglected/etc. children into a REAL Christian home. I know we cannot know who is or will be regenerated but we can predetermine who seems most willing to be around Christians and Christian expectations. It would all be laid out on the table for them, their case workers, and families. Accept it or reject it.

There is A LOT of info on my ideas that I've not shared here yet. This is simply the "intake" process. If you need other questions answered to tell me if you think this process would work, ask away. I've been mulling this over and praying about it for nearly two years now and hope to "act" on it soon.


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## Pergamum (Aug 17, 2009)

Child Evangelism Fellowship (CEF) might have some resources.


One thought: If you tell them up front what a Christian is, require them to be one, and make rules about institutionalized worship - if done in the wrong manner - you will make them view our faith as another hoop to jump through rather than a great pleasure and privilege. Many Fundy Bible schools started out I am sure with good intentions, too. There are lots of "rules" and "have tos" in your description above. These need to be viewed as privileges and services and great advantages to your home instead of hoops and confinements.


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## Tim (Aug 17, 2009)

ReformedWretch said:


> The[y] would be required to do/follow things such as attending Church Sunday morning, evening and mid week, daily prayer and devotions, Christian counseling in regard to their issues/problems, and the rules of the home would be decided upon by the Christian parents of that home and must be followed (these would be reviewed by the administration before being put in place but the child need not know that).



Adam - I think you are on to something here. The area of my local church here in Cape Town supposedly has a number of children from 'broken' homes. Some of us were talking about how to minister to children/youth that don't have Christian homes. My comment was that if you just have them go to a youth group on Friday night, they still don't ever learn what a Christian home is like. 

What you have suggested actually brings children into the support and structure of a home that follows this maxim:

Jos 24:15 ...but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.


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## ReformedWretch (Aug 17, 2009)

Perg-Thanks! I'll consider re-wording that better when I create official literature. I hope to have many wise counsel before that happens, maybe even a few from here? No one will be forced to be a Christian (impossible) but one will live in a home with Christian expectations 24/7.

Tim, thanks! There are many lost children in need of care (believe me, I know!) and the world, and Churches with poor doctrine are the ones taking them in and directing their ways for the most part. I pray to change that.


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## Raj (Aug 19, 2009)

Dear brother. Adam 

We thank God for your plan and vision to serve the children in need of help. We will be praying for you that God gives you success in this important ministry. 

Please remember us too as we also are involved with the children of Dalit people group.


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## a mere housewife (Aug 19, 2009)

Adam would this then be more like a 'foster child' program, specifically geared to place children in Christian families? (Would the placement be long term or short term/remedial?)

I think it would be _wonderful_ if you could start such a program. If we are still in the states and able I would love to know more about involvement if you are able to get it going. We had a foster child and it was a terribly difficult experience but I did see how much God uses a Christian family structure in the lives of children and how powerful it can be with those who have been so torn up in broken homes. (Last we knew, Cord was still attending church on his own.)

I am unclear on this part, could you explain a bit better? "Parents of the children placed in care would be required to go to Christian family services (counseling) chosen by our facility, and would have to meet for prayer and devotions with the staff and children before ANY visits at the home, or taking their child out for visits. They would be required to do this again before leaving the home or after dropping their child off at the home. If the parent could not make it to the home, these sessions would happen over speaker phone or web cam."

Would the parents be required to do the devotional sessions with the family? Dealing with the family was the most difficult part (there was a lot of hostility and questioning of the way we did things even over little things like trying to have a better diet) -- this, though we agreed beforehand as to what was the limit of the parents' involvement: parents just don't naturally stay uninvolved esp if the children are grumbling about rules, as children do -- and it seems like it would be nice to spare the parents that side of things as much as possible and let them focus on the children?


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## ReformedWretch (Aug 19, 2009)

Heidi

During my 15 years in childcare I always saw parents having to meet certain goals in order to visit with their children, or get them back. My hope/prayer is to work with privately placed children, in other words, working with families who want help for their children before they get into the system. Once they get into the system, it's pretty hard to place them in a home like the one I am talking about, though 



> would this then be more like a 'foster child' program, specifically geared to place children in Christian families?



is pretty close to what I want to do, BUT as I said, I'd want to work directly with families in need and NOT the government system, but in a perfect scenario, where an agency knew what we we're and how we worked, I wouldn't turn them away if they we're willing to accept us "AS IS".

I won't compromise to get State placements. This is the problem with most "Christian Childcare Agencies/Homes". They are forced to compromise in a lot of ways to get State placed Children. I've been shocked at how many "Christian" homes are not very Christian at all.

So yes, parents would have to participate in devotions during visits as well as before taking their child, say for a weekend or something, and upon returning them. They parent and child would also have to attend an approved Church while out of visits as well.



> Would the placement be long term or short term/remedial?)



What ever the need may be.

The only way we (believers in the Church) can be successful at calling needy children and families to repentance "within a system of care" is to operate completely independently, raising the money, or maybe even using our own homes, etc. to take these children in.

I have a TON of ideas as to how to do it, as I officialize it all I hope to get into some interested Churches to share the ideas and see if they want to move forward with it.


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## a mere housewife (Aug 19, 2009)

Adam that sounds great. 

My only suggestion, as someone who has long been interested in trying to find out how to be involved with something like this eventually (through a specifically Christian outreach and without having to jump through all govt hoops), would be to have staff involved who would deal with the childrens' parents (devotions etc) _distinct_ from the people who are opening their homes. It's not that one wishes for the families who are taking in children/childrens' parents to never interact etc., but it would have taken much of the difficult strain and complication out of our time with Cord if someone else had been fielding the parental hostility/concerns/needs side of things, letting us focus our resources on him.


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## ReformedWretch (Aug 19, 2009)

Makes sense, that's the kind of thoughts/suggestions I'm looking for as I take the time to get this all together.


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## JBaldwin (Aug 19, 2009)

I pray that this will work out for you, Adam. I am deeply burdened for there to be more places like this available to teens, especially those who have become believers are a having to deal with terrible parents.


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## ReformedWretch (Aug 19, 2009)

another situation in need of addressing!

Thanks


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