# Church I can take my toddler?



## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

One thing I love about the primitive baptists is that all ages worship together. At my current church if I have my child with me and she starts to talk I cringe with anxiety that I am distracting others - I'm sure there are churches out there that allow, and champion, Sunday service together where there is no fear that I will be unwelcome.... Mind you I live in Southern California... Any denominational recommendations??


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## Andres (Mar 19, 2016)

Check out Los Angeles RPC.


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## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

Thanks!! That would be glorious but alas I'm inland about an hour...

Do you know of any "denomination" that goes out of their way to cater and allow meeting as a family??


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## bookslover (Mar 19, 2016)

I'm not sure you can call what toddlers do during the service "worship," but whatevs.

You'd be more than welcome at Westminster Presbyterian Church (OPC) in Orange County.


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## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

Haha true! But what I really meant to say is that I want us all together at all ages (toddler - 18 and beyond)

I actually formally lived down the street from that church (I think it was that one). Again though, I'm inland (Yucaipa/Redlands/Beaumont area)... But are you saying OPCs come together in all ages??


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## Parakaleo (Mar 19, 2016)

bookslover said:


> I'm not sure you can call what toddlers do during the service "worship," but whatevs.



Really?



> For behold, when the sound of your greeting came to my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. Luke 1:44


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## Jack K (Mar 19, 2016)

You can't always tell by denomination alone, but the relatively recent trend of making parents feel like their little ones are unwelcome in the worship service is probably most common in some non-denominational evangelical churches, or in certain charismatic churches... basically those churches that define a "good" worship service as one where people achieve the right worshipful experience. Most Bible-believing Presbyterians/Reformed or traditional Baptists (which groups make up the majority of this board) don't think that way—or historically, at least, they have downplayed experience and have valued having even the youngest members exposed to the means of grace in the worship service.

There's probably a greater range of thinking within churches calling themselves "Baptist" than in Presbyterian and Reformed churches. I would be quite surprised to enter a church that was PCA, OPC, ARP, URCNA, RPC or any of the similar Bible-believing Presbyterian/Reformed denominations and find displeasure at my child coming into the service. With Baptists, though, it's harder to know. You sort of need to judge whether it's a more traditional church (like most Primitive Baptists, which you mentioned) or one that's going for the whole worshipful experience thing.


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## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

Thank you so much for that overview - it really does help me gauge.

Indeed the church I attend is a Calvary (FYI I very much am unhappy with that church but I attend because my parents, sisters and their spouses and their kids all attend and I do local outreach and all the reformed churches are in the next town over)

Thanks again!!!


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## Goodcheer68 (Mar 19, 2016)

I believe there is a URNC and maybe an OPC in Redlands (20 mins away). The church (PCA) I am part of is in Palm Desert (30-35 mins away).


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## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

Hmmm... I can do Redlands!!! 

I love the desert where you are - if my kids could hang with the drive I'd be in

Again, thank you


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## Stope (Mar 19, 2016)

Sorry, I don't know much about various denominations, so having said that, what is the difference between the 2 you referenced?


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## timfost (Mar 20, 2016)

Have you looked for an RCUS church? I can't speak for the whole denomination, but our pastor is very understanding and speaks highly of infant and toddler noises.  I don't know how close any of them are to where you live...

http://www.rcus.org/congregations/


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## TheOldCourse (Mar 20, 2016)

Stope said:


> Sorry, I don't know much about various denominations, so having said that, what is the difference between the 2 you referenced?
> 
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk



Between the OPC and URC? Not a lot. Both are confessionaly Reformed denominations but the OPC is of a British heritage that confesses the Westminster Standards and the URC is of a Dutch heritage that confesses the Three Forms of Unity. Differences are mostly cultural in that many URC churches are still very Dutch (and there's nothing wrong with that), but it's less so in your neck of the woods. The PCA is like the OPC but a bit more generically evangelical in practice. I find that the PCA much more likely to have things like children's church and the like, but there's some variation between congregations.


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## Cymro (Mar 20, 2016)

An old preacher said to me, don't worry about the baby crying, I can shout louder than him!


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## Nate (Mar 20, 2016)

Come on over to our church in Redlands. All ages worship together... There are a couple dozen toddler age children in the church currently. It is expected that the children will be in the worship service (although, that doesn't mean that we are not active in teaching our youngest children proper behavior in worship).
There is also an OPC that meets right on the Redlands/Mentone border. I attended an OPC for 4 years and they welcomed young children in the service too.


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## bookslover (Mar 20, 2016)

Stope said:


> Haha true! But what I really meant to say is that I want us all together at all ages (toddler - 18 and beyond)
> 
> I actually formally lived down the street from that church (I think it was that one). Again though, I'm inland (Yucaipa/Redlands/Beaumont area)... But are you saying OPCs come together in all ages??
> 
> ...



Yes, we do.


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## bookslover (Mar 20, 2016)

Parakaleo said:


> bookslover said:
> 
> 
> > I'm not sure you can call what toddlers do during the service "worship," but whatevs.
> ...



A baby in the womb is not a toddler. Besides, that verse is describing an exceptional event.


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## Miss Marple (Mar 20, 2016)

bookslover said:


> Parakaleo said:
> 
> 
> > bookslover said:
> ...



Psalm 8:2 Through the praise of children and infants
you have established a stronghold against your enemies,
to silence the foe and the avenger.


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## christian (Mar 21, 2016)

In my congregation the Sabbath School meet before the morning service in the gallery upstairs and then come down and join us as the service begins. Some of the children aged about 7, 8 or 9 might exchange a few words at inappropriate points in the service but they usually whisper, which shows me that they are conscious of needing to be respectful; even if they can't resist the temptation to chatter. If toddlers cry or get annoyed and really distract the service; then usually their mothers will take them out of the service into the vestry. Which means that their mothers don't get to hear the sermon. But, then again, they wouldn't have heard it anyway.

In my country, Scotland in the UK, there is a great spirit of rebellion amongst children and adults against all authority and it is exacerbated by absurd lawmaking with regards to discipling of children and the powers of parents and teachers. Therefore, if we see any children in church it is a rare blessing and I think anything or anyone who would make them unwelcome would be frowned upon. I remember my brother telling me that in his church in England a group of teenage boys came for some weeks and were a little boisterous and occasionally wrote text messages on their phones. Then one of the elders got annoyed and told them that if they were going to act in that way not to come at all. And, So! They don't now come at all. This is a sad story but it is a reflection of the days we live in. I think the elder did the wrong thing but the boys had grown; like most teenagers, to be careless and thoughtless about decency and order. There was a time in Scotland when no child would have questioned whether or not he ought to be in church. There was such a fear of God in the land that everyone attended church and if you didn't attend, you weren't made to feel unwelcome; you were actually disciplined for irregular attendance. In fact, I believe that after to signing of the Solemn League and Covenant (which was part of the nations constitution), the civil magistrate could be called upon to punish those who would not attend and certainly if those people held opinions that were against the principles of the Reformation . The fourth section of the Solemn League and Covenant reads as follows.

"We shall also with all faithfulness endeavour the discovery of all such as have been or shall be incendiaries, malignants or evil instruments, by hindering the reformation of religion, dividing the King from his people, or one of the kingdoms from another, or making any faction or parties amongst the people, contrary to the league and covenant, that they may be brought to public trial and receive condign punishment, as the degree of their offences shall require or deserve, or the supreme judicatories of both kingdoms respectively, or others having power from them for that effect, shall judge convenient."

Well, Jason, I'm sorry for going off on a tangent. All of our children are members of the visible church and bringing them to the means of grace is a scriptural duty and The Lord delights to see them in the congregation of the saints. Luke 18:15 reads as follows, "And they brought unto him also infants, that he would touch them: but when his disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein."

I pray and hope The Lord blesses you and your children Jason in seeking to do His will. But wherever you go if you set your love upon Him, He will be with you. He will set you on high and honour you. Psalm 91:14,15.


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## Edward (Mar 21, 2016)

christian said:


> then usually their mothers will take them out of the service into the vestry. Which means that their mothers don't get to hear the sermon.



A microphone and speaker would be a circumstance, not an element. For the price of a baby monitor, there would be no need for the mothers to miss the sermon.


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## 2ndViolinist (Mar 21, 2016)

Stope said:


> But are you saying OPCs come together in all ages??



My pastor was going through a sermon series on the biblical family model some years ago. He urged the congregation not to frown upon hearing the cries of young ones during a worship service, for those were the sounds of the covenant children. Something to that effect, but said much more beautifully.

Like Jack said, I don't know if something like that can be found more in some denominations than others.


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## Romans922 (Mar 21, 2016)

http://www.sovereigngraceopc.org/index.php This OPC church is in Redlands, CA


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## sam (Mar 21, 2016)

bookslover said:


> I'm not sure you can call what toddlers do during the service "worship," but whatevs.



LOL! Indeed. We've worked hard so our 3yrd old can be under the same preaching we hear. Sometimes I whisper a kid-i-fied version of what's going on for him. Some times he's too wiggly and we sit down stairs for 5 minutes so he can get a break, but we talk about the sermon on the speakers. We're more anti-nursery than lots of good, solid reformed folks. Praise God you're getting The Word in your kids ears! It's worth the effort.

Our church family is OPC and there is a strong desire for kids to be in the service. We have a nursery, and no one will say anything if you use it, but we praise God for kids, even crying ones, hearing of the hope mom and dad have.


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## christian (Mar 21, 2016)

Edward said:


> christian said:
> 
> 
> > then usually their mothers will take them out of the service into the vestry. Which means that their mothers don't get to hear the sermon.
> ...



Your right Edward. I'll tell the minister and I'm sure he will think its a good solution. Because our babies are usually well behaved it doesn't happen very often. In fact there is only one two year old now, and he used to occasionally cry but now he's settled down and he seems to be enjoying the services. I sometimes hear him trying to join in the Psalm singing; which always makes me smile. But I think I might know where to get a baby monitor for future emergencies. Thank you Edward. I'm glad you brought it to mind. It's just one of those things that nobody ever got around to doing.


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## Stope (Mar 22, 2016)

Thank you all for these very very very encouraging words!!! Indeed Im digging in now for the churches referenced above. Again, thank you all for your help!!!

Also, if there are ANY threads that have to do with raising a 2 year old please let me know, Im new to this dad thing and want to do it right so I will take all advice shared!

Blessings!


Jason


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