# Raising NON wimpy kids



## Richard King (Jan 7, 2008)

This speaker's ideas will sound so basic and obvious to most of us because what he describes as exposure to risk or danger is what we would call a good morning of playy in our childhood BUT it isn't like that anymore so I thought I would put this link here for the consideration of parents of young ones.

TED | Talks | Gever Tulley: 5 dangerous things you should let your kids do (video)


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## Reformed Covenanter (Jan 7, 2008)

Read Doug Wilson's _Future Men_ if you do not want to raise wimpy boys.


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## BJClark (Jan 7, 2008)

I constantly tell my son he can not live in my fears..like when he is skateboarding and he see's a look on my face (where I can picture him breaking an arm or leg and I wince up) I tell him "don't look at my face, just get out there and make that six foot drop" but then he also has a fear of jumping a hand rail and falling legs apart on the rail and injuring himself...OUCH..so I just tell him..don't think about it..and give it a try..focus on the trick not a possible injury, let mom think about that for you..

And when he's playing football, or climbing tree's I have to keep reminding myself..this IS what Boys do...and it's okay..and if he gets hurt, that's something he needs to help overcome any fears to become the man God desires him to be..


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## Reformed Covenanter (Jan 7, 2008)

BJClark said:


> I constantly tell my son he can not live in my fears..like when he is skateboarding and he see's a look on my face (where I can picture him breaking an arm or leg and I wince up) I tell him "don't look at my face, just get out there and make that six foot drop" but then he also has a fear of jumping a hand rail and falling legs apart on the rail and injuring himself...OUCH..so I just tell him..don't think about it..and give it a try..focus on the trick not a possible injury, let mom think about that for you..
> 
> And when he's playing football, or climbing tree's I have to keep reminding myself..this IS what Boys do...and it's okay..and if he gets hurt, that's something he needs to help overcome any fears to become the man God desires him to be..



Good thoughts.


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## Davidius (Jan 7, 2008)

What should someone do who was raised by a father who always wanted him to be safe? I would like to teach my kids how to: use guns, knives, fire, tools, etc. but I have to admit that I don't really know how to use them myself. It would be great if I could try to get back all that time and also prepare myself for raising my own children someday. Suggestions?


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## etexas (Jan 7, 2008)

Davidius said:


> What should someone do who was raised by a father who always wanted him to be safe? I would like to teach my kids how to: use guns, knives, fire, tools, etc. but I have to admit that I don't really know how to use them myself. It would be great if I could try to get back all that time and also prepare myself for raising my own children someday. Suggestions?


Scouting! No joke! I was a Cub Scout and a Boy Scout, boys learn great stuff there David!


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## Reformed Covenanter (Jan 7, 2008)

Davidius said:


> What should someone do who was raised by a father who always wanted him to be safe? I would like to teach my kids how to: use guns, knives, fire, tools, etc. but I have to admit that I don't really know how to use them myself. It would be great if I could try to get back all that time and also prepare myself for raising my own children someday. Suggestions?



To start with, read Doug Wilson's _Future Men_.


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## Davidius (Jan 7, 2008)

Daniel Ritchie said:


> Davidius said:
> 
> 
> > What should someone do who was raised by a father who always wanted him to be safe? I would like to teach my kids how to: use guns, knives, fire, tools, etc. but I have to admit that I don't really know how to use them myself. It would be great if I could try to get back all that time and also prepare myself for raising my own children someday. Suggestions?
> ...



I found the ToC at Amazon but it doesn't say anything about how guns and tools work. How much of the work is theory? I need some real hands-on training. I'm already convinced that I need to do manly things!


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## Reformed Covenanter (Jan 7, 2008)

Davidius said:


> Daniel Ritchie said:
> 
> 
> > Davidius said:
> ...



Yeah, I suppose it doesn't...it just tells you to use them.


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## Davidius (Jan 7, 2008)

Maybe I should just go through the Dangerous Book for Boys.


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## Kevin Lewis (Jan 7, 2008)

*Amen Brother!*



Daniel Ritchie said:


> Read Doug Wilson's _Future Men_ if you do not want to raise wimpy boys.


Couldn't agree more. I am in no way opposed to allowing boys to partake in these activities. Whimpyness does not have anything to do with being injured, mauled or many of the things Gever describes. This is using the world's standard of "manliness". This is yet another subtle influence from the world of what we want our boys to turn out to be. Again, there is nothing wrong with allowing our boys to do these things, but don't base your definition on whether or not they participate on them.


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## a mere housewife (Jan 7, 2008)

I don't have children but I have to let my husband to play with sharp deadly objects and slide around in the Grand Canyon in kung fu slippers and let people practice wrist breaking techniques on him and leap over high gaps in things and so on. I don't really say much I just look in another direction and hum an hymn quietly under my hyperventilated breathing. I've already decided that if we have boys I will either lose consciousness for a few years or adopt a strict 'don't ask, don't tell' policy. I won't ask what dangerous things they've been doing and will plug my ears and recite the catechism if they try to tell me. They can talk to their father about stuff like that. Better yet they don't need to involve either of us: they ought to learn from an early age to pursue the object not for the praise or terrified expostulation they might receive but for itself: in this case presumably, the sheer joy of hazarding life and limb, defying death and laughing in its teeth and all, and vaulting off its incisors just as it was swallowing them whole and living to not-tell about it. This is what my husband and his brothers did all those years they were allowed to roam free in Mexico city: they had to be back and alive by seven but after their parents went to bed at eight or nine Ruben had the rest of the evening to inch secretively around the fifth story over the stone courtyard hanging from the flat roof by his fingertips. Going to bed early is a great way not to know about these things.


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## BJClark (Jan 7, 2008)

Davidius;



> What should someone do who was raised by a father who always wanted him to be safe? I would like to teach my kids how to: use guns, knives, fire, tools, etc. but I have to admit that I don't really know how to use them myself. It would be great if I could try to get back all that time and also prepare myself for raising my own children someday. Suggestions?



Are there any men in your church who hunt, fish, or camp that you could ask to mentor you in these areas? Maybe there are a group of young men in your church who would also be interested in learning these things, where a group of you could get together and go camping...a type of mens retreat or something.

And re: guns, have you considered going to a class on gun safety?

if there are men in your church who do cook-outs maybe ask them to help you learn to use a grill as well...use both charcoal and propane..though personal preference are things on a charcoal grill...

But that could be something the men could use as a discipleship program for younger men, it could help build friendships, trust, and an accountability group for all involved..

Something else is ask some of the men who are good with various tools and see if they could teach you how to use those as well...


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## etexas (Jan 7, 2008)

Yep, Scouting! Almost nothing will do a better job of keeping a boy from going Commie or Sissy better!


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