# Driving Tip in Indonesia



## Average Joey (Jun 1, 2005)

Having spent 4 months in Indonesia before,I found this to be a hilarious article.The driving there is insane.You can see traffic a little in this picture I took.Believe me when I say that this is extremely light traffic there.http://www.geocities.com/joe_memphis23/Kalapa_Gading_View1.jpg

Driving Tip in Indonesia
To operate a motor vehicle in Indonesia, you must understand the transportation gestalt in an entirely different way. Definitions that you thought were above redefinition will immediately be redefined. Please pay attention.

The Road:

Includes not only the paved portion of the highway, but also what others might call the verge, the curb, the sidewalk, the front yard and the roadside restaurant. The paved portion of the roadway is generally one lane wide. Not one lane in each direction, but one lane.

Respect:

All animals are granted the greatest respect in Indonesia. It is presumed that, being highly evolved creatures, chickens and dogs and the like know how to sidestep a Mitsubishi going 78 mph on a fog shrouded road during a national religious holiday.

This same position of honor is granted to small children, men with 30 pounds of hay on their heads, unattended oxcarts and elderly women in mystic trances. Slowing or swerving to avoid these beings would cause them dishonor.

Lanes:

These colorful white and yellow markings wish a hearty Selamat Datang (welcome) to every traveler. They have no other function.

Passing:

The national sport of Indonesia. Observant motorists may encounter the vertical triple (passing three vehicles in one acceleratory movement), the horizontal triple (passing a vehicle that itself is in the process of passing a vehicle), or even the rare double-double (passing a vehicle at precisely the same time that another vehicle, coming in the other direction is also engaged in the act of passing).

Tailgating:

What to do when not passing.

Being Passed:

An insult not to be endured. The greater the differential between your vehicle (say, a Boeing 747), the great the potential loss of prestige. The owner of the less powerful vehicle must always do everything in his/her power to thwart the attempt to overtake.

Seat Belts:

Absolutely unnecessary. Not only are they not worn, they are not even provided. Passengers are fully protected by the horn.

Lights:

Rapidly blinking the headlights can mean many things, including "OK to pass now," "dangerous to pass now," "get out the way," or "may you find the thread of gold in the linen of existence. "It takes years, sometimes entire lifetimes, to learn this subtle and intriguing intuitive nonverbal communication skill. Generally, however, you have about three seconds.

The Horn:

When sounded loudly and frequently, the horn sets up an invisible energy barrier protecting the vehicle and its inhabitants from all harm. The faster the vehicle is going, the better the horn works. This is the central concept of Indonesian motoring.

Accidents:

Rare. Usually the result of a malfunctioning horn.

Adapted from: In expat website / An article by Jon Carroll, San Francisco Chronicle, November 4, 1988 (and nothing has changed since then


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## Jonathan (Jun 3, 2005)

Wow, and I thought the Autobahn sounded fun....


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## Average Joey (Jun 4, 2005)

> _Originally posted by Jonathan_
> Wow, and I thought the Autobahn sounded fun....



While in Jakarta,Indonesia,I took the taxi around most of the time.At first it was quite frightening because these drivers drove so extremely fast.We also were without seatbelts.In a city with over 15 million it was wild.After a while I got relaxed.I tell you the truth when I say that these are some of the best drivers in the world.These guys swerve in and out of traffic with ease.For how much traffic there was I only saw two accidents while there.I saw one which a van hit a telephone poll.It looked serious.The second was a small motorcycle wreck.They were fine.
Oh boy I remember the traffic jams.It is common to be stuck in traffic jams for a couple of hours.My wife told me that at work or anywhere a person has an appointment,it is expected that they will be at least 30 minutes late.The pastor who married us was late for our wedding!Can you guess why?Traffic jams!
But,believe it or not,I really miss Indonesia.On the news currently there is a scare of another suicide bombing.Which of course is scary,but I won`t hesitate to go back.There is a way to avoid something like a terrorist attack most of the time.Stay away from where westerners like to go.Blend in with the people.Go where the native people go.They have the best malls I have ever seen.I went to one of these malls and it was over ten stories high!This is one of the few pictures I could find of one.It`s not a very big photo but check it out.








[Edited on 6-4-2005 by Average Joey]


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## Abd_Yesua_alMasih (Jun 4, 2005)

Sounds like India! Except in India...

You stop for everyone who walks out in front of you (cows more so than anything - and never dare move them on - you must wait).

Traffic lights are optional.

One-Way roads are optional.

Seat belts are not needed - but hey you cant get much over 30kph.

Roads can look like anything. The more cracks, polt holes and rubbish covering them the better.

Traffic jams only matter when you are in the middle. When on the outside just drive off the road and skirt around it. When the footpaths, oncoming lanes, front yards etc... are full then it really is a jam.

Whether riding on an elephant, oxen, truck or BMW everyone has right of way. This includes men on push bikes with trailers the size of a van. 

Beeping, tooting and general horn blowing is necessary to show people you are actually there and the louder you do this the more right of way you get.


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## Average Joey (Jun 5, 2005)

> _Originally posted by Abd_Yesua_alMasih_
> Sounds like India! Except in India...
> 
> You stop for everyone who walks out in front of you (cows more so than anything - and never dare move them on - you must wait).
> ...



Man,that is almost just like Indonesia.Except for the animals thing.


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## Average Joey (Jul 3, 2005)

Here is a picture I found of an example of traffic in Jakarta.Usually it looks like this on both sides though.Especially in rush hour.Places(distances) that take maybe 30 minutes to get to here would take up to 2 hours sometimes there.


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## Contra_Mundum (Jul 3, 2005)

Egypt is not much different.


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