# permission to marry your wife...



## QueenEsther (Oct 23, 2006)

Did any of you guys have to ask permission to marry your wife?

If you did, were there things you had to do or prove first?


One of my friends had to give his future father-in-law several if his financial statements and write a five year plan and all, to prove that he was financially secure and responsible enough to support a family.

I was just wondering what yall had to go through..


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## Herald (Oct 23, 2006)

I drove down from New Jersey for the weekend. My future inlaws were invited to a cook out at a well-to-do friends house. I took a walk with my future father-in-law around the tennis courts. I got up the nerve to ask his permission to marry his daughter. He looked at me and said, "Boy, if you ever hurt my little girl, I'll come back from the grave and kill you. Welcome to the family!" And what that he gave me a hug.

I was elated and scared to death at the same time. No financial statements. No DNA tests. His not-so-veiled threat set me on the straight an narrow. He is now in glory, but I remember that day as if it just happend.


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## Tirian (Oct 23, 2006)

I asked my then future father in law before I proposed & before discussing it with my future wife. I think I can recall he took a deep breath, smiled warmly and said "what took you so long?" and gave me his permission, warm welcome and encouragement!



He didnt ask me for anything else - I'd known him for some time and I think he felt comfortable that it was the Lord's will otherwise he would have refused.

Matt


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## Scott Bushey (Oct 23, 2006)

I asked for permission. They acted as if it was odd that I asked and gave me their blessings. Being a believer, you want to have the family onboard.


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## LadyFlynt (Oct 23, 2006)

Hubby asked. The rule given was that I finish highschool first. Found out later that they had hoped we would elope a year sooner, hubby had tried to get me to elope a year sooner, the pastor stated at our wedding that he would have eloped us if we had come to him as soon as I was 18 (a year sooner)...


all that said....


I am totally against eloping.


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## ChristopherPaul (Oct 23, 2006)

Kara (my now wife) and I were at her house and we just had a disagreement - she got angry and left the house. I was left at her house with just me and her folks, so I thought it was a better time than any to ask permission. They thought it was odd that we were in the middle of a fight and I chose that time to ask, but it was actually very appropriate in my mind.

I asked her mom first to see what she thought. She called in Kara’s dad and I officially asked permission. He then quoted Jimmy Stewart from the Movie _Shenandoah _by saying, “Well, let me ask you this, do you like her?” The answer he was looking for was “Yes” not “I love her” (I guess you have to see the movie to get it).

They did not expect kids in this day and age to even consider the parents, so that in itself was enough for them to know I am a “good guy.”


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## rmdmphilosopher (Oct 23, 2006)

So I'm not married, but my brother-in-law had to ask my father for permission to marry my sister by telephone, since he lived in PA and we in AZ at the time. My dad didn't know him very well, but he agreed because he trusted my sister's judgment and on the condition that they have a 'personal discussion' before the wedding... Well they didn't get a chance to have that personal discussion until the NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING! My dad took the poor fellow into a room and sat him down in a chair facing him and spoke with him for an hour... When my brother-in-law came out he was rather pale and jittery, and it took him almost an hour into the bachelor party that night to regain his joviality...


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## JonathanHunt (Oct 23, 2006)

I phoned my F-I-L to ask. I think he nearly had a heart attack. Not only had his daughter suddenly professed faith in Christ (nominal christian Church of England background) but she wanted to marry the very religious fanatic who had 'turned' her.

There was a bit of a pause, and he said yes. I think he was pleased that I asked him, and I hope that now, four years down the line, he's pleased that he answered in the affirmative!

JH


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## QueenEsther (Oct 23, 2006)

rmdmphilosopher said:


> So I'm not married, but my brother-in-law had to ask my father for permission to marry my sister by telephone, since he lived in PA and we in AZ at the time. My dad didn't know him very well, but he agreed because he trusted my sister's judgment and on the condition that they have a 'personal discussion' before the wedding... Well they didn't get a chance to have that personal discussion until the NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING! My dad took the poor fellow into a room and sat him down in a chair facing him and spoke with him for an hour... When my brother-in-law came out he was rather pale and jittery, and it took him almost an hour into the bachelor party that night to regain his joviality...



That's funny, I wonder what he told him....


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## kvanlaan (Oct 25, 2006)

My father-in-law was on his way back from an unsuccessful morning of hunting and had a 30-06 over his shoulder. At least he said yes.


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## bfrank (Oct 25, 2006)

I asked my FIL for permission. I'm not sure where I got the idea to do so...I was young and wasn't really brought up or taught to do that. I think I overheard someone speaking on it and I found it to be a kind of "outdated novelty" that I wanted to partake in. 

All that being said, I will EXPECT to be asked for permission for either of my daughter's hands. If it doesn't happen, I will not be on board.


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## Dag Fish (Oct 26, 2006)

Asked her father and he said "Oh, I thought that was already settled. Here's her Grandmother's diamonds, you might want to get them reset."


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