# When you're the only Calvinist in town...



## danmpem (May 6, 2008)

I'm very interested in knowing what others have done - and are presently doing - when they are the only Calvinist in their local body.* When you say "pray for me" or "pray for my friend", what do you ask for?* If you seek Godly advice from someone, how many grains of salt do you take it with?* When you struggle with questions about God, How hard is it articulating your thoughts to your friends? How do you stay devoted to a church which is seriously missing the mark?

I am going to allow a lot of freedom in interpreting these questions.* Right now, I truly feel as though I am in this position, being a devout Calvinist, but not theologically accepted anywhere I go.* Most of my brothers and sisters at church go with whatever wind of doctrine is popular at the time.* My few Calvinist friends are highly intolerant of my inquiries to such things as infant baptism, ecclesiogy, and the very foundations of scripture itself.


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## danmpem (May 6, 2008)

BTW, I have no idea why these "*" keep appearing in my text.


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## Herald (May 6, 2008)

Dan,

You asked the right question.



> How do you stay devoted to a church which is seriously missing the mark?



While you are there you are required to submit to the leadership of the church. You are also to minister to the body of Christ through fellowship, prayer and acts of service. When you are asked to pray, do so giving God the glory and asking for His will to be done. Model your prayers is such a way. That is something we all should do, not just those of us in situations like yours. You have to ask yourself whether this is where you will be able to worship long term. 

Here are some links for you to look at:

ARBCA Churches Directory

Reformed Baptist Church Directory


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## kvanlaan (May 6, 2008)

brother, I hear you loud and clear. At our non-denom fellowship, you really don't know what is happening (in some cases) when you publically request prayer. Yes, we have some solid members. But there are some in the crowd who are ''namin' and claimin'" from God for you, and I've even heard a man stand up and begin prayer with "FatherMother God...".



> You are also to minister to the body of Christ through fellowship, prayer and acts of service.



This is what we've tried to focus on (it is not easy, but the surroundings make it all the more necessary!)

This is why I am so very thankful for elders like Mr. Brown and the many pastors that we can consult with freely on the PB. 

This place is a balm to needy souls.


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## jwithnell (May 6, 2008)

Brother, I've been in your shoes and know how difficult it can be. (I was in two Independent Baptist churches while living on the west coast.) 

First, you want to find agreement where you can: does your church truly believe that Christ is the only means of salvation and that the Bible is God's holy word? If so rejoice with them. Participate fully in what you know is right -- fellowship with your brothers, serving one another in love, and so forth. Keep yourself well fed by what is available on the Internet. 

Although the pastor and one close friend knew where I stood, I chose to keep quiet about doctrine because I just couldn't figure out a way to say much without disrespecting the church's leadership. Prayer can be difficult because it will reveal what you know to be true about God. I would keep very focused on your audience (God) and trying to glorify Him and His marvelous attributes. 

In the long run, I had to seriously question my staying in a place without a good reformed church, and God honored that and moved me to a terrific church and life situation.


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## Blue Tick (May 6, 2008)

Dan,

I would echo all of the advice that's been put forward. Try to find unity where you can, be a light, and let your speech be seasoned with the gospel of grace. Put on the bowels of compassion toward others and pray that God would sanctify the minds of those who you're close to.


In my experience it is incredibly difficult to be in the situation such as yours. My wife and I were in the same situation 3 years ago not as members of a church but as staff ministry leaders. It came to the point where we in good conscience could no longer attend the church nor support the leadership. It was a difficult decision but the Lord was very gracious to us when we decided to leave.


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## N. Eshelman (May 6, 2008)

I moved to Grand Rapids, MI! 

I was being accused of being a Calvinist, before I even knew what it was. I guess that my view of the Bible was stained because I was reading it!


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## Davidius (May 6, 2008)

It's tough. While I understand the importance of finding unity where unity can be found, I also know that this is not easy when the rubber meets the road. Being Calvinist does not mean that we have this doctrine of predestination that we put over here in one corner, while the rest of our Christian walk is in this other corner and can be easily understood and shared by everyone. Calvinism, and a right understanding of God's sovereignty in particular, affects every part of our doctrine and practice. When I'm with my Christian friends on campus, or back home, I usually don't say much on spiritual matters unless I'm asked to speak, because it's impossible for me to approach a situation without my Calvinism showing through somehow. If I talk, it usually turns into a debate because my entire worldview is _so_ different from my semi-pelagian, broadly evangelical and/or charismatic friends' worldviews. If there's a way that I haven't found, I hope that others on this board will be able to provide that advice for both our sakes.


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## Grymir (May 6, 2008)

I'm kinda face with the same situation. There's no reformed church's in my area. So I found the closest to it, and went there. They started O.K., but have gone down the modernists (contemporary worship) path. They are more barthian than calvinist. It's more important to go to a chuch than no church at all. If you can deal with the stuff, you'll do o.k., if it becomes difficult, you might want to consider some of the options the other posters have posted.

Good luck - Grymir


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## JM (May 6, 2008)

I'm in the same boat but have no real advice. There are only two Churches in town worth attending, one is IFB and the other is APR, being a Baptist I attend the IFB and will just have to put up with the anti-Calvinist comments and defend free grace the best I can.

Peace.

j


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## Mushroom (May 6, 2008)

There's a PCA Church in SLO. I imagine you'd find other RB's (I'm assuming you're one) attending there. Have you tried it?


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## Davidius (May 6, 2008)

Grymir said:


> I'm kinda face with the same situation. There's no reformed church's in my area. So I found the closest to it, and went there. They started O.K., but have gone down the modernists (contemporary worship) path. They are more barthian than calvinist. It's more important to go to a chuch than no church at all. If you can deal with the stuff, you'll do o.k., if it becomes difficult, you might want to consider some of the options the other posters have posted.
> 
> Good luck - Grymir



What is better about going to a terrible church, which may not be a true church, than going to no church at all?


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## Jerusalem Blade (May 6, 2008)

When I first moved to my city in Cyprus, Limassol, there was no Reformed church at all, and only one in the whole nation (not including a group that quietly met in a home in another city). My wife and I went to a non-denom, rule by elders / no pastor assembly where we had some very good friends. But we had come from Redeemer PCA in Manhattan, and the self-effort, performance-oriented approach to God so grieved us that we left, that plus the elders were on different pages theologically.

I visited many evangelical churches in the city (we checked out two charismatic groups, and my wife said, "Please don't bring me to these again!"). We settled on an IFB church, which was well organized, and pastored by a godly man. I met with him privately and flew my true colors, and told him I would not undermine his authority or doctrine. As we had similar views on the Scripture (AV), he had me teach his Adult Sunday School, which I did for about two years or so. I taught on various topics, and expounded various sections of Scripture, according to the doctrines of grace, without running against the pastor's views.

As noted above, it was a ministry of spiritual nurture and edification to brothers and sisters in Christ.

And I learned a lot from how the pastor conducted himself and governed the church, with grace, firmness, and a jovial southern hospitality -- he and his wife both. And my wife loved her, and benefited from her Bible Studies.

Just observing the man over the years I was edified. And we remain friends to this day.

At a certain point I purposed to plant a Reformed church in my city and the Lord eventually brought it to pass. We have gone through difficult straits, and I foresee more coming up. But the Gospel is preached, and our Sovereign God and Father is glorified in the gospel of His Son.

But this is a foreign mission field, and things are not as they are where there is abundant supply of God's ministers.

If worst came to worst, we could always gather with like-minded believers in a home, study, pray, worship together, support one another en route to the Kingdom.


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## Davidius (May 6, 2008)

joshua said:


> Davidius said:
> 
> 
> > What is better about going to a terrible church, which may not be a true church, than going to no church at all?
> ...



I understand what you're saying, but having someone in your congregation who is sexually immoral, and problems with a misuse of the charismatic gifts, are not the same thing as going to a "church," which is no church at all, instead of staying home. Would you go to a Roman Catholic church or Jehovah's Witness congregation if you lived in a town with no evangelical presence? That is the kind of situation to which my question was directed. Perhaps I misunderstood what Grymir meant; his statement seemed overly general to me.


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## Prudence and Passion (May 6, 2008)

The main reason I joined PB was to find like-minded people. My husband and I are the only Calvinists in our church (he is the pastor, at that!).


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