# Discouraged. (Please bear with length)



## A.Hudson (Jun 2, 2009)

Well I just felt like sharing this cause it has been on my heart for a while, but I'm not asking for a pitty party maybe just some wisdom in this area. I have been in Ministry for a few years now, and me and all my brothers and sisters I'm in ministry with do Christian rap I know, I know, a lot of people will look at it and say it's just music but to be honest the music is nothing, it's just a tool that we use to spread The Gospel, what really matters is what goes on after the music stops..we're really big on discipleship, evangelism, being sound in theology, teaching, missions, and by God's Grace He's allowed us to preach at certain events too, also has opened the door for certain brothers to do missions outside of the country. Anyways I've been in ministry a couple of years and I feel that only by His Grace GOD has used me and a lot of my other brothers and sisters in Christ for His Glory, and to testify of The Gospel of The Grace of GOD. But what has really hit me hard lately is a lot of my brothers I'm in ministry with are in Bible college, and some on there way to Seminary. And lately, I kind of feel like I'm the only one, (with the exception of a few other brothers) who attends a regular secular college. I would Love to attend Bible College even go to seminary one day, but by the loans I've already had to take out to pay for school looks like that won't be happening.

I'm in school for Graphic Design, and GOD has used it for His Glory only by His Grace, being that He's opened the doors for me to help out in the media department at the church, and met other solid brothers and sisters in Christ who design as well. But I feel like that in sooo many of my brothers it's evident that they will be called to be full time in Ministry, not just because of there education, but because u can almost see God's calling in there life now, just by how He uses them. I can see some who will be Pastors, some who will be teachers, or missionaries. We have a camp filled with solid brothers in the faith, who really go Hard for GOD. And I feel like I like to do Graphic Design no doubt, especially for GOD'S Glory...but I feel like I also want to do ministry, I'm not saying that I can't do both, and I understand Ministry is 24/7 it's not a job nor a position, it's a lifestyle weather your a pastor or you work at a grocery store. But I just feel like GOD has surrounded me with so many solid brothers (And thank GOD that He has allowed me to be) For they have influenced me heavily to be sound in doctrine and theology,turned me to other sound dudes in the faith, and also just have been great examples, of how True believers Live there lives. 

But it seems now as we get older (Even though we're all still young, in our early and mid 20's,) (I Just turned 20) I can kinda see that GOD is leading people in the direction He wants them to go, some are in school for pastoral, some for missions, some to teach. And it seems like everyone knows what GOD is calling them to do except me. I know GOD has called me to be His Ambassador, He's called me to testify of The Gospel of Christ, die daily, and give my life away so other may see how much of a treasure Christ Truly is. But I feel like I don't know where I fit in in the Body of Christ, like my brothers do. Some know there called to pastor, or teach, or be a missionary I can see it, they have such a heart and passion to do it. I feel like I love learning about theology, and proper exegesis of the scriptures, and explaining things, but I'm not called to teach, I feel like I Love talking some may think I do to much but, I'm not called to pastor (Even though My grandfather did), I feel like I like to evangelize to old friends in my neighborhood (not the nicest) and would have no problem going to the mission fields, would actually Love too, But I'm not called to do it like Paul Washer and others do. It's not that I don't have a heart to do these things I DO! But I don't feel like I'm called in it full time like alot of my boys are, and it makes me really discouraged. I don't want to be Just a Christian Graphic Designer, I would give it up if GOD told me too! I feel like there's so much more, but I don't know what. I dont' feel I'm called to pastor like, Piper, or teach like Sproul and MacArthur, or some Seminary professors. I feel like GOD would still use me to teach, and minister which I LOVE, But I just wont be called to teach as well or like other great men of GOD that I look up to do. And I def don't have the education to. Not saying u have to go to Bible College or seminary to be sound in your theology, teaching, and doctrine, I know brothers who haven't and you would think they did. I just know that sometimes without an actually degree it can limit how far you go, so it seems. (But GOD in His Sovereignty is in Control of that) even though there's some with M.Div's that teach complete heresy. 

(Anyway) I just feel like all my brothers have so much going for them in Ministry, and even though (By God's Grace) I'm side by side in ministry with them, ministered at several events, evangelized with them, discuss theology with them, I feel like down the road, they have so much ahead of them, especially the ones going to seminary. And I feel like I'm just stuck at a normal college. But Praise GOD I know it's His will for me to be there, being that He allowed me to tell other friends, and even my whole class The Gospel, the wrath of GOD, repentance, redemption the whole 9..also got to debate a little with my World Religions teacher on some of her beliefs which went well. But sometimes I still feel discouraged...have any of you ever been through this??? Any advice???

(P.S. a lot of Christian rap ministers we are very inspired by are apart of Reach Records Reach Home) They are partnered up with Desiring God ministries...There doing the Don't waste your life tour now. There songs are packed with a lot of what we like to call Lyrical theology. There also reformed. another is www.crossmovementrecords.com as well. You can also check out both of there channel's, and music video's/interviews on youtube..Reach records| Crossmovementrecords


----------



## Beth Ellen Nagle (Jun 2, 2009)

I don't have advice but will pray for you.


----------



## A.Hudson (Jun 2, 2009)

Thanks so much


----------



## Knoxienne (Jun 2, 2009)

Brother Ameen, it's evident from this and your other posts that you love the Lord and have a passion to serve Him with every fiber of your being. The encouragement I have to give you is this: Because you have such a fervor
for the Lord and to serve Him and His Church, He _will_ use you. Trust in His faithfulness as He sanctifies you, and continue studying and obeying His Word. As His providence unfolds, you will see and know the work and service He has you to perform. And it will be fulfilling and gratifying beyond your imagination.

One of the advantages of being older is being able to look back on life and see where God has been faithful when we were insecure and afraid and to remember those times and see His faithfulness come to pass in time. 

Be encouraged, Dear Brother.


----------



## PresbyDane (Jun 2, 2009)




----------



## ww (Jun 2, 2009)

Hey Meen,

You do have a passion for Christ evident in your post that won't go unrewarded. Don't worry about what others have been called to do and just focus on living daily for Him and looking for opportunities to serve Him. In time He will show you how He will have you serve Him in whatever vocation He calls you but patience is definitely a Christian virtue you must learn to possess in order to be content in Christ. It is easier said than done for all of us but through prayer He gives it to us.


----------



## larryjf (Jun 2, 2009)

Try not to be too concerned about judging your walk in the light of others. I notices that you said things like...

[speaking of missions] "I'm not called to do it like Paul Washer and others do."

"I don't feel I'm called to pastor like, Piper, or teach like Sproul and MacArthur"

I can tell you this much, you do not fit into the Body of Christ in the same way that another man does...you fit it in a way that is unique to you. God doesn't want a bunch of Sproul's or Piper's...He wants you and He wants your all...no more and no less than He wants Sproul or Piper.

(1Co 12:14-18)
For the body is not one member, but many. If the foot shall say, Because I am not the hand, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where were the smelling? But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him.


----------



## A.Hudson (Jun 2, 2009)

Knoxienne said:


> Brother Ameen, it's evident from this and your other posts that you love the Lord and have a passion to serve Him with every fiber of your being. The encouragement I have to give you is this: Because you have such a fervor
> for the Lord and to serve Him and His Church, He _will_ use you. Trust in His faithfulness as He sanctifies you, and continue studying and obeying His Word. As His providence unfolds, you will see and know the work and service He has you to perform. And it will be fulfilling and gratifying beyond your imagination.
> 
> One of the advantages of being older is being able to look back on life and see where God has been faithful when we were insecure and afraid and to remember those times and see His faithfulness come to pass in time.
> ...



Thank you so much, Praise GOD.



whitway said:


> Hey Meen,
> 
> You do have a passion for Christ evident in your post that won't go unrewarded. Don't worry about what others have been called to do and just focus on living daily for Him and looking for opportunities to serve Him. In time He will show you how He will have you serve Him in whatever vocation He calls you but patience is definitely a Christian virtue you must learn to possess in order to be content in Christ. It is easier said than done for all of us but through prayer He gives it to us.



That is very true, Patience is def something that I need to depend on GOD to install in me more and more, thanks you so very much for the encouragement brother.



larryjf said:


> Try not to be too concerned about judging your walk in the light of others. I notices that you said things like...
> 
> [speaking of missions] "I'm not called to do it like Paul Washer and others do."
> 
> ...



True Praise GOD, I really needed to read 1 Cor 12:14-18 again, I need to look into it even more tonight  ..thanks so much for the encouragement you guys, I Love you all.


----------



## jambo (Jun 2, 2009)

Thank you for sharing that. I am struck by the fact that you obviously look up to others who are in ministry and feel that that they have a lot going for them. From what you say in your post, I would not be surprised if they look at you and think that you have a lot going for you and that down the road God will bless you richly. 

I think of the disciples walking along the beach after the resurrection. Peter wants to know what is going to happen to John. Was Peter envious? Jealous? Did he feel, because of his denial, he was going to be less effective than John? We do not know but the important thing is that Jesus basically says, 'dont worry about John, just follow me' 

The important thing for us is that it does not matter how the Lord deals with our friends, but how we follow the Lord, whether we are in full time ministry or otherwise, we just follow him, where we are using the gifts he has given us. I recall a saying of Spurgeon who was talking about this very thing "I can glorify God just as much by sweeping the street as by preaching on it"

I would continue on where you are doing what you are already doing. I believe a factory worker, a student, an office worker is just a called as as a full time minister and his role is just as important.


----------



## reformedminister (Jun 2, 2009)

Meen,

When I first got called into the ministry, I thought the thing to do was go to Bible College. At the time I was going to a secular University, but a good one. However, my pastor wisely counseled me to stay in the secular University and major in something that I was interested in. After I graduated and was still interested, I could go to seminary. This was good advice and encouraged me to have a backup plan. The only thing I would have added is for me to pick out a field where there was a demand. I majored in Psycology, which really requires a Master's to do anything with. I waited three years before entering the seminary and had trouble landing a good job in between. God will direct your steps.


----------



## rpeters (Jun 2, 2009)

Let me share astory from my life and that may help. I felt at very young in my faith that God was calling me to be a pastor. ewell I had one problem a stuttered very Bad. I fet to myself God you definetley got the wrong guy. I felt like Moses. To make matters worse when consulted my pastors and elders they said Bob I think you got this wrong. I strayedfrom the Lord for a time, But God pulled me back to Him. Then he gave the call again. I was nowa tutor on teh college level in subjects like calculus, math, programm etc. God displayed himself to me in ways I could never imagine. The Lord has opened doors to me through Lamp seminary which has been a joy and delight. Why do I say all this. Sometime God is working in our midst and we do not even realize it. I too when for a technical field(Computer Engineering) which i think God brought me their to be a light and communicate his Word to people who do not know Him or would never go o church. ALso I agree do not be like Piper, Macarthur, Etc. Be you! I have the depest respect for Piper, Macarthur, Sproul, White just to name a few. In some ways I am a mix between all of them. Calvin was needed in Geneva and he was effective because he submitted God Alone. Edwards was effective and used by God because he submitted to God Alone. God calls us all to unique ministries. Part of rightly knowing God is knowing ourselves and the unique person God had called us to be and people to minister to. I hope this help. I will pray for you.


----------



## Scott1 (Jun 2, 2009)

> Proverbs 16:9
> 
> 9A man's heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.


.


----------



## awretchsavedbygrace (Jun 2, 2009)

I do rap music also. might want to hook up.  email me.

-----Added 6/2/2009 at 07:32:52 EST-----

o and crossmovement is not reformed at all to my knowledge. Youtube Shai linne or Timothy brindle instead.


----------



## Tim (Jun 3, 2009)

Ameen,

As others have said, it is clear that you desire to serve God to the very best of your ability. And God will indeed bless this desire, since it is He who put it there!

I have a few comments to encourage you.

Your profile indicates that you have been a Christian for 3 years. No doubt God has taken you a long way during this time. But you still have many good things to look forward to in how God will help you grow. In the near and far future, you will discover many things about yourself and change in many ways. 

As you grow, it is reasonable to expect increased clarity about what God would have you do.

My next comment is a practical one. You may be in a situation where Bible college or seminary is not a present option. But there is no reason why you won't have that opportunity in your late twenties, your thirties, or even your forties. There will be plenty of time to pay off loans and save for a school of your choice, if that is what you truly desire to do. Set a goal and work for it, if it is truly your heart's desire. And never give up.

I encourage you to speak to the elders at your church. Ask them how you can best serve the body and reach out to unbelievers. What abilities do they see that you have? What challenges do they suggest that you tackle? Do they think you need to grow in a specific area of your Christian life?

Finally, you are a child of God who is fearfully and wonderfully made. You are unique. God has put you in your specific situation for works He has created for you. No one else on earth can accomplish these works. Pray. Fast. Seek the wisdom of the Lord. He will lead you lovingly to where you are to serve Him.


----------



## LeeJUk (Jun 3, 2009)

Well actually I was in your position a while ago and without me really doing much consciously things just started to fall into place and God started speaking to me through other people.

I've actually heard 3 people preach on this and I find that it was extremely wise.

1) SermonAudio.com - Knowing God's Will 
and
SermonAudio.com - 4 Steps in Knowing the Will of God

These are sermons that are really great on the issue and are very practical.

2) I can't remember the actual message I heard but it was from Paul Washer, he said basically as long as your renewing your mind in the world of God and surrendered to his will then you'll end up getting to the place where he wants you in your life.


3) Speak to your pastor and even to the brothers and sisters you mentioned in this post, who are in bible college and know what their on their way to. How did they know? 

Pray about it before hand, ask God to speak powerfully to you through his people then speak to each of them explicitly about your problem and honestly. Maybe they'll all come to the same conclusion in what they tell you individually? 

God spoke to me through people on a particular day without me praying about it or anything but it set me on the course im on now to ministry and I was drifting around in the dark, confused before then.


----------



## A.Hudson (Jun 3, 2009)

Thank you all for the encouragement and prayers, it's been a BIG help...Praise GOD!

-----Added 6/3/2009 at 01:49:02 EST-----



XBlackWaterX said:


> I do rap music also. might want to hook up.  email me.
> 
> -----Added 6/2/2009 at 07:32:52 EST-----
> 
> o and crossmovement is not reformed at all to my knowledge. Youtube Shai linne or Timothy brindle instead.


Word, If The Lord wills, we can all get up sometime, you can find some of the Video's people put up on youtube too, under H.G.A, and K.B And seckond chaynce...but to my knowledge I think Crossmovement is def reformed, I know Ambassador and Flame def are, and if they weren't I don't see why they at the label, would let artist like Flame make songs about it, if they didn't agree with his theology..as far as lampmode they def are...especially Shai


----------



## Confessor (Jun 3, 2009)

If money is the only issue regarding seminary, and not time, there's always The North American Reformed Seminary.

And of course...


----------



## A.Hudson (Jun 3, 2009)

^^^ Yea I was looking at that, is it any good?


----------



## Confessor (Jun 3, 2009)

A.Hudson said:


> ^^^ Yea I was looking at that, is it any good?



I've heard good things about it. Otherwise, it would definitely be better for you to ask someone actually associated with the seminary. (I don't mean to sound sarcastic.)

Does anyone else know who to contact for TNARS information?


----------



## JonathanHunt (Jun 3, 2009)

Yeah, that guy who already posted on this thread whose signature looks like this:

Larry Bray
Elder - Reformed Presbyterian Church of Boothwyn, PCA
Boothwyn, PA - Reformed Presbyterian Church - Boothwyn, PA
Free Online Reformed Seminary - The North American Reformed Seminary


----------



## larryjf (Jun 3, 2009)

Confessor said:


> A.Hudson said:
> 
> 
> > ^^^ Yea I was looking at that, is it any good?
> ...



You could talk to me about TNARS...or you could email the administration here...
[email protected]

-----Added 6/3/2009 at 06:13:15 EST-----



JonathanHunt said:


> Yeah, that guy who already posted on this thread whose signature looks like this:
> 
> Larry Bray
> Elder - Reformed Presbyterian Church of Boothwyn, PCA
> ...



Exactly!


----------



## rpeters (Jun 3, 2009)

Lamp Seminary might be another option. There are many sites in FL


----------



## A.Hudson (Jun 3, 2009)

larryjf said:


> Confessor said:
> 
> 
> > A.Hudson said:
> ...



Ok, lol well I can send u a private message..


----------



## Confessor (Jun 3, 2009)

JonathanHunt said:


> Yeah, that guy who already posted on this thread whose signature looks like this:
> 
> Larry Bray
> Elder - Reformed Presbyterian Church of Boothwyn, PCA
> ...


----------

