# Family Worship with an Autistic Child



## Josh Williamson (Nov 18, 2014)

G'day Everyone!

I'm hoping that some of my PB brethren could give me some advice. My three year old son has recently been diagnosed as highly functioning, non-verbal autistic. We have known for sometime that something wasn't right, but we've finally discovered what it is. Over the past few years we have struggled with Family Worship as my little boy struggles to sit still, and easily gets distressed. I was wondering if anyone else has had dealings with autistic children, if so, I'm hoping that they can give advice and tips on how we can better have Family Worship. 

Also, I have been told that using the AV / KJV is quite beneficial for children with autism as they seem to pick up the poetic nature of the text better than normal. A friend of mine who has an autistic child said this has been a blessing to them. Has anyone else experienced something similar? 

Thanks

Yours in the Fellowship of the Gospel

Josh


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## whirlingmerc (Nov 19, 2014)

Toddlers like repetition. A simple picture and a word over and over. Maybe pick one song to sing the same song every night for sleep.
The same verse all week or all month can be OK.Children desiring God has an article on teaching a child with autism http://www.childrendesiringgod.org/documents/events/2011/fischer.pdf

My favorite story Bible for small toddlers is 
http://www.amazon.com/Read-Aloud-Bi...=8-33&keywords=story+bible&pebp=1416400918140
Pictures are simple

It's not quite the same but one family at church had an asperger child and I was on the 1-3rd grade Sunday School team he was going to.
We actually had an enjoyable tie in the class with him, but did have some adjustment.


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## KMK (Nov 19, 2014)

My autistic daughter is now seven and she loves family worship. She struggles with learning in many areas but not with God's Word. However, she made things very difficult for us when she was three! Now she makes things difficult in other areas. HA


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## C. M. Sheffield (Nov 19, 2014)

The most important thing is to not expect perfection. Keep it brief, simple, joyful, and with an eye to your child understanding the gospel. Sing, read and teach from the bible, and pray as a family. He may interrupt, fidget, and play--don't let that discourage you. Mine do all these things. We simply have to be patient, press through, and keep at it.


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## jwithnell (Nov 19, 2014)

Can you help me understand the non-verbal part of the diagnosis; doing so could help in a response to your questions.


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## Josh Williamson (Nov 19, 2014)

Non-verbal means he isn't speaking much. He is improving in this area but he only says a handful of words


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## KMK (Nov 20, 2014)

C. M. Sheffield said:


> The most important thing is to not expect perfection. Keep it brief, simple, joyful, and with an eye to your child understanding the gospel. Sing, read and teach from the bible, and pray as a family. He may interrupt, fidget, and play--don't let that discourage you. Mine do all these things. We simply have to be patient, press through, and keep at it.



I remember when we adopted our first special needs baby thinking to myself, "This isn't the Vision Forum catalogue anymore!"


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## jwithnell (Nov 20, 2014)

With our two youngest, including my autistic son, we started early on teaching them hand motions for the children's catechism which they enthusiastically engaged in as we were putting them to bed. They also loved our singing hymns to them. As they became a little older, we established a before-they-go-up to bed routine of scripture reading and prayer and sometimes hymns and catechism. We viewed this time as important not only because of family worship but also because it provided a training time for public worship. Consistency is critical -- ritual and predictability are usually very important for spectrum kids.

Some of the best advice we received early on: your expectations should be the same as for any covenant child, but it will take your child much longer. You might want to try a really, really short family worship time and make a huge deal when your child succeeds, then slowly lengthen the time. It's a bit much to expect any young boy to sit perfectly still and quiet. Quietly maneuvering a favorite stuffed animal or action figure is OK with us, as is doodling during church (though the permissible time for the drawing has shrunk over the years so they can fully participating in hymns, responsive readings etc.).

You might also consider recruiting veteran moms to help train your child during the regular worship service so your wife can fully attend to those critical means of grace. Our congregation approached us about doing this and it was a life saver to me.

Let me know if there are any specific questions I can answer.


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## jandrusk (Nov 20, 2014)

My youngest son, who will be 10 in January was diagnosed on the spectrum when he was 3 as well. He was pretty much non-verbal at the time as well, but we got him into a special school at the time. His speech did improve a little bit, but it was like night and day when we had him streamlined in school among those who were not on the spectrum and his speech improved dramatically. As far as family devotions I have found we need to make the sessions short and terse in relation to the language used. I have not found much success with the bible in general since he struggles with reading, but am going to be trying the KJV soon. The main thing to remember is to keep it simple and short. I would also recommend ensuring your child is part of corporate worship as kids on the spectrum understand and know a lot more than what they can communicate.


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## Josh Williamson (Nov 20, 2014)

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. Very helpful.


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## Puritan Sailor (Nov 21, 2014)

We have one child on the spectrum though on the mild side. He tolerates family worship fine now at 13. But it was a challenge earlier on mainly because he was easily distracted and needed to move. I would agree with advice given so far. Keep it short and consistent. Play to his strengths. If he likes to move, use motions or dramatic reading. If he likes stories, then stick to narrative portions of Scripture (usually a good rule for younger children anyway). And remember, he is probably learning more than you think he is, even though he may not be able to articulate it. And patience is important. If family worship is impossible to do because he's having bad spell, shorten it even more or let it go and try again later. Keep the long view in mind and don't let the short-term obstacles discourage you too much. And he will probably have better and worse times of the day. As you get to know his cycles, try to have family worship around those better times. Hope this helpful.


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