# Married folk - when do you read?



## nwink (Feb 22, 2012)

For those on PB who are married and/or have children (those who need love and attention), when do you find time to read? I find it hard to have any time to read during the week between having a job and spending time with my wife when I'm home. (I am married with no children yet)

I have heard some older married men say they wish they would've spent more time with their kids -- I want to give my family the time they deserve yet I am also so eager and interested for everything I read but have so little time for it. 

So how do you do it? Do you maybe have set times when you read as a family, even if it's each person doing their own, personal reading? How do you do it if your spouse isn't a big reader? (You wouldn't want to just leave your spouse bored while you go off on your own to read for a while...)


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## Kim G (Feb 22, 2012)

When my husband and I were first married, we mistakenly thought we had to spend all of our time doing purposeful things together like we had when we were dating. We soon learned we each NEEDED to take time for ourselves. My husband is not a reader, but he loves to relax with video games. So he'd play on the computer and I'd read.

Now, after our two kids are asleep, we spend a little time connecting, and then we spend the rest of the time doing whatever we want. I take my shower, read a book for a little while, then head to bed. He either reads, plays a game, or watches an episode on Netflix before he turns in. It's our way of winding down.

Does your wife have a hobby? She should find one so you don't feel guilty reading. If all else fails, read in the bathroom.  That's what I did growing up to get away from my brothers.


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## FenderPriest (Feb 22, 2012)

Our son wakes up at 7am. I wake up early enough to eat breakfast, spend an hour in devotion time, and an hour reading/writing. And then I study two nights a week after the little man goes to bed. My wife and I have worked through our schedule to emphasize those things that are important. Getting time to study, read, and write are important to me, so we make the schedule serve those desires. It's not perfect (my "hour of reading/writing" is often 30-45 minutes, but it's still time) and we aren't rigid about it, but it is important to us because it is how we express and live in the good things the Lord has given us and calls us to (especially me with thinking through pastoral ministry and calling).

That's what we do - we've been doing it like that for a while now, even before our son was born.


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## jwithnell (Feb 22, 2012)

Before the little guys get up in the morning (if the reading takes any brain power) and in the half hour+ before going to sleep.


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## Curt (Feb 22, 2012)

Us older folk don't have to worry about taking care of the kids. Nor, in my case, do I have to worry about a job (that's a joke, we still have a full-time ministry), bedtime is still reading time.


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## JML (Feb 22, 2012)

I am a night owl and my wife is a morning person so I read at night after everyone has gone to bed. The kids go to bed at 8:00 and my wife is usually in bed by 10:30. So, a lot of times I will read for an hour or so after she goes to bed.


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## Jeff Burns (Feb 22, 2012)

If you have a TV, get rid of it (at least for a time). Less time wasted in front of it means more time to spend with your wife and to pursue other more worthwhile endeavors. My wife and I read together a lot. Either individually, or I'll read aloud to us. I also would encourage you to rise earlier in the am than she so that you have some alone time to pray, read, and study.


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## Mathetes (Feb 22, 2012)

I usually read during my lunch break at work. I also take notes from the books I'm reading. My wife actually works an evening shift, so I usually have time at night to take my notes and then type them into Word format.


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## JML (Feb 22, 2012)

Also, to add to mine. I have a 40 minute commute each day (20 minutes each way) and I listen to the Bible on CD during the commute. It is amazing how many chapters you can get in for 40 minutes a day, 5 days a week. I would recommend anyone with a decent commute to listen to the Bible on CD or sermons. I used to waste my time listening to the radio which is not inherently wrong but once I realized how many chapters of Scripture I could get in I haven't gone back to the radio.


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## Scottish Lass (Feb 22, 2012)

After putting Gracie to bed.


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## Raine (Feb 22, 2012)

I've had much less reading time since my son was born, but I still make time for it at night after my husband goes to sleep and sometimes during the day when my son is napping. I'm also teaching him to sit for a few minutes at a time with paper and crayons or a board book, in hopes of eventually getting some time to read or write during the day. Prior to that, I had a job where I had a lot of time to read and my husband and I would sometimes spend a few hours a day in the evenings reading, curled up on the couch with a book each.


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## Miss Marple (Feb 23, 2012)

Wow, no time to read an no children to even interfere? You are in for some hardship in the reading time area

Well, when my children were young I could barely read. The few times I found a few moments' peace and sat down to read, I'd usually fall asleep as the words began swimming on the page.

To every thing there is a season.

If it is a high priority, you have to schedule it. Perhaps Saturday afternoons or some such.

Also, don't consider your reading time to be a complete neglect of wife or future children. Within reason it sets a good example and presumably is a means of grace for you.

Finally, reading aloud together is good family fun, assuming everyone is enjoying the story or devotional. Don't punish them with it.


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## Zork (Feb 23, 2012)

3:30 in the mornings, As I am a slower reader I need more time. LOL.


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## Jeremy Hoover (Feb 23, 2012)

Great thread. I read in the morning while my son is playing with his toys. In the evening, after he goes to bed, my wife and I usually watch an episode or two of something on TV. She'll then often do some work on the computer and I'll read until we go to bed. It's definitely changed since our son has come along, but I can still find time if I really want to. 

I'm also able to read quite a bit at work, which helps immensely.


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## rookie (Feb 23, 2012)

We don't have kids yet, and my wife is usually in bed by 8:30pm....unless she's working the evening shift at her store...so my reading gets in anytime after that. I don't usually hit the sack till about 11pm...


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## Bethel (Feb 23, 2012)

John Lanier said:


> I am a night owl and my wife is a morning person so I read at night after everyone has gone to bed. The kids go to bed at 8:00 and my wife is usually in bed by 10:30. So, a lot of times I will read for an hour or so after she goes to bed.



This is similar to our family except that I'm the night owl and my husband is the morning person. Our kids are older so their bedtime is 9:00 P.M.

I can also read during the day while I homeschool our boys, but I usually don't read anything heavy which requires a lot of thought or concentration because that time is subject to interruption.


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## Pergamum (Feb 23, 2012)

Audiobooks (Download Audio Books with Audible.com Online Digital Audio Book Store is great, as are the Great Courses) or (don't laugh) we sometimes lock ourselves in the bathroom (my "mini-library").

I carry a book everywhere. All the pilots we fly with in and out of the bush know me as the missionary that always has a book in his hand. I read a good book on hospitality the last time I took a canoe trip (bring an umbrella, shelter underneath, and read as you float, since the locals know the river better anyway). I try to read the bible while eating breakfast (before the distractions start).


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