# How do you know when God...



## LeeJUk (Sep 5, 2009)

Wants you to attempt to date/court a girl?


Theres just this one girl who keeps coming up in my conversations today and like it's been this entire day when I think about it. Just bombarded with her in conversations with other christians, my pastor when we were in the car, recommends I be with her without me mentioning it, when I came home tonight, a family member starts talking about her without me mentioning her...


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## Brian Withnell (Sep 5, 2009)

LeeJUk said:


> Wants you to attempt to date/court a girl?
> 
> 
> Theres just this one girl who keeps coming up in my conversations today and like it's been this entire day when I think about it. Just bombarded with her in conversations with other christians, my pastor when we were in the car, recommends I be with her without me mentioning it, when I came home tonight, a family member starts talking about her without me mentioning her...



Hmmm.... could this be a case of "Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean everyone isn't out to get you."


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## Calvinist Cowboy (Sep 5, 2009)

Don't worry about it. Just see what happens over the next few weeks.


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## Grymir (Sep 5, 2009)

...or maybe it's time to get out the marriage manual!...


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## timmopussycat (Sep 5, 2009)

LeeJUk said:


> How do you know when God wants you to attempt to date/court a girl?



With great difficulty, particularly if you strongly want to date/court the girl.



LeeJUk said:


> Theres just this one girl who keeps coming up in my conversations today and like it's been this entire day when I think about it. Just bombarded with her in conversations with other christians, my pastor when we were in the car, recommends I be with her without me mentioning it, when I came home tonight, a family member starts talking about her without me mentioning her...



Provided the lady in question is biblically qualified to be a Christian wife, I think the decision is something for you and the lady to make as you get to know each other. One caveat: be particularly cautious in situations where one of the two of you does not want to pursue the relationship and the other has a "God told me that this is the one" attitude.

On the other hand, one strong indicator in my pre-marital situation was this: normally a quite selfish sort, I was surprised to find myself wanting to do things for the Orchid Lady - to a quite remarkable extent. If you find yourself enjoying serving the lady, that's a very good sign.


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## LeeJUk (Sep 6, 2009)

hmm thanks for the advice so far. I think the woman in question would qualify biblically(book of proverbs etc... ) having known her for 2 years. Shes in love with the Lord and is a youth leader in her church and her family whom i know well are all well saved and godly people to have fellowship with.


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## buggy (Sep 6, 2009)

A very good question! Because I'm now also facing some dilemmas as well... now that I'm in college, I meet across many wonderful, attractive, unattached Christian girls. I'm not sure as to whom should I think of dating yet... 

Any takers here?


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## LeeJUk (Sep 6, 2009)

[Off Topic Joke I heard in Church]

How many Church of Scotland men does it take to change a lightbulb?

They'll be no change in this church!


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## steven-nemes (Sep 6, 2009)

Well, just talk to her and see how it goes. If it is not God's will that anything happens, then of course nothing will happen.


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## Beoga (Sep 7, 2009)

steven-nemes said:


> Well, just talk to her and see how it goes. If it is not God's will that anything happens, then of course nothing will happen.



Would it be wise to talk to her or her did first?


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## ClayPot (Sep 7, 2009)

Lee, 

My simple answer: you don't. I'm sure you are seeking to be honorable in your actions, but it is unbiblical to try to find "God's blue print for your life". You don't try to find out God's "secret" (decretive, sovereign, etc.) will. God calls us to do what is moral, wise, and in accordance with our preferences. His moral will is laid out in his word, and guides our wisdom and preferences. There is no third "will" for my life I need to find out (like who I should marry). 

I'd strongly encourage you to listen to Greg Koukl's "Decision Making and the Will of God" series (from the Stand to Reason website). It's relatively cheap ($10) and is downloadable. Here is the link: https://secure2.convio.net/str/site/Ecommerce?VIEW_PRODUCT=true&product_id=3723&store_id=1341

Hope this helps.


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## Southern Twang (Sep 7, 2009)

I would first determine if you are in fact interested in her and that she is somewhat interested in you.

After that you should really speak to her dad. Mention to her that you are thinking about talking to her dad about a potential courtship or wanting to get know her better. If she says no, then you you know not to proceed. But if she gives you the go a head get the long process started...

That's the way it is working out for me at least....


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