# Breastfeeding as a Burden - Narcissism to the extreme



## kvanlaan

The Case Against Breast-Feeding - The Atlantic (April 2009)

Feminist liberal narcissism delivered to your door. This was misdirected to our home and nearly gave my wife an embolism.

Her favorite line: "...it is a serious time commitment that pretty much guarantees that you will not work in any meaningful way."

Breastfeeding advocate or no, women who talk like this are missing a very essential part of their feminine makeup.

Read it and you will see that the baby is an afterthought, it is all about ME.

We're reaping the whirlwind of the 60's.

Also in this edition:
Why Jesus Loves Globalisation
The Revenge of Karl Marx
The Genius of Slasher Flicks


----------



## LadyFlynt

Yeah, it was posted elsewhere and I couldn't even get through half of it without thinking, "ignorant, stupid, selfish woman".

Yes, breastfeeding sometimes hurts. Yes, it's sometimes annoying. No, it's not always a warm and fuzzy feeling...especially if you are a long term nurser. Yes, it eats up a lot of your day and night. But the whole point is, IT'S NOT ABOUT US! It's about feeding, nurturing, caring for our babes! It's doing what is best for THEM! CHILDREN take time, money, patience, create messes, frustration, etc. If you don't like it and can't be bothered, then DON'T HAVE THEM!

Rant off.


----------



## ColdSilverMoon

Yep, utter selfishness. The article conveniently ignores the piles of research in the pediatric, gynecologic, and even psychiatric literature that strongly recommend breastfeeding for both the baby AND the mother. There's no need to go into the litany of benefits here, other than to say mothers who breastfeed generally consider it a priceless and irreplaceable time of bonding and intimacy that no one else, including the father, can possibly experience. Those who forgo breastfeeding (for selfish reasons) are just harming themselves...


----------



## LawrenceU

That article is stupid. Selfish. Stupid. It will do well in our society. It just fits the narcissistic America.


----------



## Sven

William Gouge has an excellent section on nursing in his domestical duties. I would highly recommend everyone read the whole book, but I think husbands and their wives would do well to read the section on nursing. 

The whole book can be found here.


----------



## BJClark

I haven't finished reading the article, but to me it doesn't sound as if she is necessarily downing breast feeding, as much as criticizing those who try to stigmatize or even shun those who do not or can not for whatever reason continue breast feeding for longer than the first six to eight weeks..



> So overall, yes, breast is probably best. But not so much better that formula deserves the label of “public health menace,” alongside smoking."
> 
> Given what we know so far, it seems reasonable to put breast-feeding’s health benefits on the plus side of the ledger and other things—modesty, independence, career, sanity—on the minus side, and then tally them up and make a decision.


----------



## kvanlaan

What got me was the utter worthlessness she assigned to her child, it seemed that her baby was a time-sucking place holder, nothing more. 

The article was about #1 _me_, #2 _me_, and #3 how the baby will affect _me_.


----------



## ZackF

kvanlaan said:


> The Case Against Breast-Feeding - The Atlantic (April 2009)
> 
> Feminist liberal narcissism delivered to your door. This was misdirected to our home and nearly gave my wife an embolism.
> 
> Her favorite line: "...it is a serious time commitment that pretty much guarantees that you will not work in any meaningful way."
> 
> Breastfeeding advocate or no, women who talk like this are missing a very essential part of their feminine makeup.
> 
> Read it and you will see that the baby is an afterthought, it is all about ME.
> 
> We're reaping the whirlwind of the 60's.
> 
> Also in this edition:
> Why Jesus Loves Globalisation
> The Revenge of Karl Marx
> The Genius of Slasher Flicks



It is beguiling how many feminists eagerly run from so much of life that is uniquely of woman.


----------



## kvanlaan

I don't get it either. To have such great privileges heaped upon you by God and to reject them completely is beyond the scope of my comprehension.


----------



## OPC'n

I didn't read the whole article. The woman just sounds angry. I'm wondering if she wasn't very good at it and just couldn't admit it...so she decides to just be very self-centered and do what makes her feel in control and happy. This isn't the thinking amongst the woman at work who are very independent. They intend to breast feed or are in the process of doing so....have lots of new moms where I work. Could be that I work with nurses and so they are educated in this area and don't have this negative outlook on breast feeding, but I don't see any of this kind of behavior. Hopefully, this woman doesn't have a wide receiving audience. It's dangerous to be ignorant and have a platform.


----------



## Athaleyah

Going to a secular college and taking a few Women's Studies classes, years before I became Christian, I can tell you that I was taught to hate anything that kept me from being able to do anything that men do. I was even taught to hate men. After all they were the great patristic evil that was systematically keeping women in an inferior position of raising children and keeping house. Christianity in particular was hated, and I railed against God and the evil woman-hating Bible along with most others in my class.

I was taught that to even want to be a stay at home mother was wrong. You were wasting your talents and giving up on your duty to be productive to society.

If you've had a few feminism classes, it is pretty easy to understand. Breast feeding=something men don't have to do. That gives men an advantage and so its wrong. So why should women have do it when they can buy formula? Its bad enough that if they want children in the first place that women have to carry them. Once you get into the mindset, its makes perfect "sense."

I'm not saying that all feminism is this way... just what I encountered in college. Certainly there are feminists out there that still want what is best for their children instead of themselves. But this probably isn't consistent with what they were taught in school. Hence breast feeding is something that they resent, but because it is better, they feel required to do it. So if there is any way it isn't better, or isn't much better, that is every reason to stop.

Thank God, I no longer believe this nonsense. But I can still understand it.


----------



## forgivenmuch

I better not let my wife see this.


----------



## Beth Ellen Nagle

I can't even read this article...


----------



## kvanlaan

My wife was so angry she was just about shaking...


----------



## Honor

we accidentally subscribed to this mag. So I read the article... I thought it wasn't bad... slanted true but then .... have you read the mag???


----------



## kvanlaan

Yep, read it. Hated it with righteous fury and indignation.



> You were wasting your talents and giving up on your duty to be productive to society.



My wife was actually told this by a friend in college!


----------



## he beholds

BJClark said:


> I haven't finished reading the article, but to me it doesn't sound as if she is necessarily downing breast feeding, as much as criticizing those who try to stigmatize or even shun those who do not or can not for whatever reason continue breast feeding for longer than the first six to eight weeks..
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So overall, yes, breast is probably best. But not so much better that formula deserves the label of “public health menace,” alongside smoking."
> 
> Given what we know so far, it seems reasonable to put breast-feeding’s health benefits on the plus side of the ledger and other things—*modesty, independence, career, sanity*—on the minus side, and then tally them up and make a decision.
Click to expand...


But to act like those things are as important as health, or that they are impossible (modesty or sanity) with breast feeding, is all too telling. 



kvanlaan said:


> Yep, read it. Hated it with righteous fury and indignation.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You were wasting your talents and giving up on your duty to be productive to society.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> My wife was actually told this by a friend in college!
Click to expand...


This is the communist manifesto! Women=worker bees.


----------



## Carolyn

I left the workplace in 1988 when our oldest was a one year old. It halved our income to the point of poverty level. The hours I worked meant I went for three day stretches without seeing him awake. He was given a combination of formula and breast milk. I grew to despise this state of affairs. I told my husband that I wanted to stay home with him. At the time, the company my husband worked for was imploding and he was in fact laid off three years later. It was amazing to see God provide.

At my age, I have no pension and no future in terms of a career. I'm not employable for many jobs because of insurance costs. If something happens to my husband, I am entirely dependent on his insurance and (what is left of) his 401k.

Ladies, I would do this again in a heartbeat. Materially, we have MUCH less than those who delayed parenthood and/or had two incomes throughout that time. We are not in a secure position now, as my husband is in manufacturing IT and I teach at a Christian school. However, what I have now is priceless: through God's grace, no huge regrets and a life that means something beyond my own puny head.


----------



## jwithnell

I _loved_ nursing my babies!

(And actually don't mind _Atlantic Monthly_. I've been a subscriber in the past and certainly don't agree with all their perspectives, but at least they assume their readers have brains. I am so tired of the dumbing down of our society. I think _People_ and _Us_ are bigger threats.)


----------



## Knoxienne

LadyFlynt said:


> Yeah, it was posted elsewhere and I couldn't even get through half of it without thinking, "ignorant, stupid, selfish woman".
> 
> Yes, breastfeeding sometimes hurts. Yes, it's sometimes annoying. No, it's not always a warm and fuzzy feeling...especially if you are a long term nurser. Yes, it eats up a lot of your day and night. But the whole point is, IT'S NOT ABOUT US! It's about feeding, nurturing, caring for our babes! It's doing what is best for THEM! CHILDREN take time, money, patience, create messes, frustration, etc. If you don't like it and can't be bothered, then DON'T HAVE THEM!
> 
> Rant off.



Dear Sister, please don't stop ranting.


----------



## Theoretical

Honor said:


> we accidentally subscribed to this mag. So I read the article... I thought it wasn't bad... slanted true but then .... have you read the mag???


Atlantic Monthly is not bad for getting commentary from the other side, because, as Jean said, they don't presume their readers to be heads of mush. Are the columns sometimes really patronizing (as this one is)? Yes, but conservatives in "our" publications also have plenty of similarly patronizing ones to the left.

I would say Slate is even better than The Atlantic in terms of providing thoughtful commentary on the left.

Similarly, Justice Scalia is best friends with Justice Ginsburg, and always hires one clerk per session who is strongly leftist, so that he can see, understand, and address the valid points his philosophical opponents raise.


----------

