# Wise words your parents told you



## Richard King

Did anything your parents used to say 
...stick with you?



My Dad used to say:

The trouble with trouble is ...
it always starts out as fun


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## larryjf

I would not consider this "good" advice, but it shows the kind of advice that i received growing up in an atheist family...

"if you do bad things the important thing is to not get caught."


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## tdowns

*My dad.....*

My dad is kind of a wild-card, and he had so many tips he wrote some books on them, but a couple he used to say, and still does.....

1. There's no free lunch.
2. Life's not fair, get used to it.
3. If this? If that? If Frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their butts, but they don't, so make it work.
4. Make the hard stuff the fun stuff, don't complain, embrace the challenge.
5. If it doesn't kill you it makes you stronger.

Just a few I remember.

From my mom....."BE NICE TO GIRLS."


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## Kenneth_Murphy

I heard the "life's not fair" one many times.

Another one was "Eat your vegitables, they are good for you".


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## BobVigneault

*Etiquette of a Gentleman*

My mom and I were having this discussion just the other day. I can't remember the context but she said, "I'll bet you've never spit on the ground have you?" Of course she was right. I had seen a woman spit on the ground a week ago and it occurred to me that I have never spit. Mom said, "I used to drill that into you."

I found this list of etiquette by Michael Bucci for Ask Men mag. (I don't recommend the mag) The list really sums up the good things my mom and dad taught me and I'm teaching to my kids.

*Etiquette of a Gentleman*
by Michael Bucci

One only needs to take a quick glance around to notice that there are very few true gentlemen remaining among us. In times past, a gentleman was much appreciated and being gentlemanly was a noble thing.

Alas, things have changed in today's society; some for the better and some for the worse. One thing that particularly irks me is the lack of good taste and etiquette most guys are guilty of at the turn of this new millennium.

I'm not saying that men should act like robots and be slaves to etiquette, but some basic good manners will go a long way in helping you during your ascent to the top.

What I've done is compile a quick list of tips that will help turn even the most blundering fool into a proper gentleman. Follow these simple tips and I can assure you that people will perceive you as a man of good breeding and taste, hence a man they wish to associate and conduct business with. Not to mention the fact that the ladies are always quite pleased to meet a real gentleman.


*general etiquette*

Always be polite
Even if you don't like someone, there is no need to lower yourself to their level. Be polite and courteous; show that you're the better man.

Do not curse
Swearing is a big no-no. It shows that you don't have the vocabulary to express your thoughts appropriately. Furthermore, it is always very crude and impolite to be vulgar.

Do not speak loudly
When you speak loudly, it raises the stress level among company. It always implies that you can't reason with people and rely on "brute force" to get your point across. It also draws attention -- negative attention.

Do not lose your temper
When you lose your temper, you are showing everyone that you can't control your emotions. If you can't even control yourself, then how can you possibly control anything else? Keep your cool at all times (it won't be easy but it is worth the effort) and people will take positive note of your levelheadedness.

Do not stare
Ogling someone is the equivalent of psychological aggression. You don't want to intimidate people for no reason.

Do not interrupt
Let people finish what they are saying before adding your comments. Interrupting others is a sign of poor etiquette and a lack of social skills. If you want to come across as egotistical, you can do so by constantly interrupting.

Do not spit
A lot of men do this almost subconsciously. Spitting is very crude and not too pretty to look at. Do not spit in public unless you want to look like you were raised in a sewer.

Respect your elders
In fact, you should respect others as you would like them to respect you. I am specifying elders because it seems that today, young men think they know it all. Well, they don't. Just think of yourself five years ago... you're much smarter and experienced today, aren't you? Of course, yet you thought you knew it all five years ago. 

Do not laugh at others' mistakes
This is perhaps one of the cruelest things one can do. When you mess up, the last thing you want is for someone not only to bring it to your attention, but to ridicule you on top of that.

Remove your hat indoors
This rule seems to have gone out the window these days. You should remove your headwear upon entering a building. Furthermore, never keep your hat on while at the dinner table. It reflects very poor etiquette.

Wait for seating before eating
When sitting down for a meal, you should wait until all the guests are properly seated and ready to commence the meal before eating. Everyone should start dining at the same time; this is a subtle but very important rule.

*the basics of chivalry*

In addition to the aforementioned rules, gentlemen (in training) should follow these additional rules when in the presence of a lady. Chivalry may be on life support, but it is not dead yet. Be one of the few to keep this flame burning for many years to come.

Always open doors
This is perhaps the most basic rule of male etiquette out there. It is also one of the easiest to follow so you have no reason to forget it. Whether she is about to enter your car, restaurant, club, or anyplace with a door, you should always hold it open. If there are many doors, then hold them open one after the other.

Put on her coat
Always help a lady put on her coat or overgarment. This is a simple but powerful action.

Help with her seat
If an unaccompanied lady is sitting next to you, it is important that you help her be seated by pulling her chair out for her and gently pushing it back into place, with the lady seated of course.

Give up your seat
If a lady arrives at the table and there are no available seats, you should stand up and offer yours to her.

Stand at attention
Always stand when a lady enters or exits the room. This rule has been somewhat relaxed, so you can stand upon entrance but remain seated upon exit. Nonetheless, if you can do both, you should.

Give her your arm
When escorting a lady (that you know) to and from social events, you should offer her your arm. This is a little more intimate, but serves well when walking on uneven ground -- especially if she's wearing high heels.

Ask if she needs anything
This is one that most guys already do, but helps complete the gentleman in all of us nevertheless. When at social events, make sure to ask the lady if you can get her something to drink (or eat, depending on the event). Show her that you care about her comfort and needs.

Gentlemen, if I may call you that, these are the rules of etiquette you should observe in everyday life. Elevate yourself above the rabble and display the mannerisms of a true gentleman. The world will appreciate such a rarity and your career will most definitely benefit from your good manners and savoir-faire .


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## Contra Marcion

My Dad once gave me some sage advice about finding a wife. He said, "Son, always ask yourself, 'If I died ten years from now, is this the woman I'd want to raise my children without me?'" 

I never forgot that. Thankfully, when I watch my beautiful wife with our children, the answer is a resounding "YES"!


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## tdowns

*Good tips.....*

I follow most on that mag tip list, the one I have to work on, is speaking too loud, I have a low, booming voice, which is great for teaching middle schoolers, and coaching and on stage when I do an occasional acting or M.C. gig....but during normal conversation, I can tend to overwhelm with my voice.......thanks for the reminder.


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## Chris

My parents aren't long on advice. 

I do remember this gem, though: 

'shut up!'


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## Blueridge Believer

My grandfather used to say to me:

Keep on doin' what yer doin' and you'll keep on gittn' what yer gittn'.


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## tdowns

*I forgot....*

the most important one, my mom used to harp on......

Wear clean underwear, you might get in a car accident, and if they have to take off your clothes, it'll be embarrassing......lol.....


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## Dagmire

I don't remember much at all that my dad ever said to me. And my mom is certainly none with wise adages.


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## Theogenes

"Always wait 45-60 minutes after eating before you go swimming- otherwise you'll cramp up and drown". Bottom line, I don't swim anymore


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## LadyFlynt

"When they're little they step on your toes, when they are older they step on your heart" also said, they tug on your apron strings to they tug on your heart strings.

"Your mouth is what gets you into trouble"

"You made your bed, lay in it"

"Marriage is a commitment, not all those ooogi-squishy feelings...re: the Finnish Boot adage"

"Don't ever go to sleep until the argument is settled and resolved"



And some not so wise words:

"Writers aren't read nor do they make any money...until their dead" 

"You're just like your father" 

"Blood is thicker than water"


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## Civbert

"For _this _I had children?!?"


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## Blue Tick

"Don't stare it's not polite"


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## VictorBravo

Some of my Dad's:

"Stand tall."

"Use a firm handshake."

"Look him in the eye when you talk."

"Measure twice, cut once."

"Understand the end before you begin."

"Fools names and fools faces often appear in public places."

"Don't fish in another man's hole."

"When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout."

"!*##*!!+++*!, Not that tool, I meant the other ***!!!###!*! tool!"


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## tcalbrecht

One thing my father taught me: Don't die without a will. 

He did.


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## Richard King

My dad's response to everything I ever griped about or whined about or wished had not happened was always...

Well, did you learn anything?

I always hated that.
Now I get it.


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## MrMerlin777

My dad always said, "Never just assume things. Because it can make an ASS out of U and ME.

He also said, "Opinions are like noses. Everyone has one."


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## Richard King

He also told me more than once...

you don't have to love me
that is sort of a volunteer thing
but you WILL respect me
or move somewhere where you can find someone else to respect


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## Poimen

pas op!

All the time too...


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## panta dokimazete

my dad...

"If I tell you a duck dips snuff, you can look under his wing for the can!"

"A hard head makes for a soft a--...behind..."


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## Dagmire

Well, I suppose my dad taught me that I should spend more time with my children than he did with me. Especially if I get terminal cancer.


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## Storm

*Terminal Cancer??*

What does that mean???

When I was out of college and flush with cash from my first engineering job I wanted to buy a brand new royal blue Firebird with a T-top. When I asked my dad what he thought I should do he said, "Well, if you spend you money on a new car, you won't have money to spend on other things." I told him that I didn't need money for other things. But, in the end, I bought a used Datsun 210 station wagon for $2,000. A year later I went to grad school. I never could have paid for grad school (MBA) if I had spent my money on a new car. (Before grad school, I bought a sweet used Toyta Celica GT for $6,000, so all was not lost!)

My youth leader used to say (about sex), "You can only do something for the first time once!" That kept me out of trouble...mostly...


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## jenney

Davis,

I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart grieves to think of the pain you've had in the last ten years since losing your father. I know the Lord has a special mercy for the fatherless and I hope that you will know deeply His mercies as they are new every morning, regardless of yesterday's sins and temptations.

I don't know the mind of God and why He has chosen such difficult providence for you, but I do know that He is faithful. May He continue to glorify Himself in you.


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## Dagmire

Storm said:


> What does that mean???




Terminal means leading to death.






jenney said:


> Davis,
> 
> I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart grieves to think of the pain you've had in the last ten years since losing your father. I know the Lord has a special mercy for the fatherless and I hope that you will know deeply His mercies as they are new every morning, regardless of yesterday's sins and temptations.
> 
> I don't know the mind of God and why He has chosen such difficult providence for you, but I do know that He is faithful. May He continue to glorify Himself in you.




Thank you for your kind words. You've been a help to me. It's amazing what a few words can do to a weary soul.

May the Lord pour out his grace upon you and fill your life with his peace.

Your brother,
Davis


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## LadyFlynt

victorbravo said:


> "!*##*!!+++*!, Not that tool, I meant the other ***!!!###!*! tool!"



Yep...dealt with that one regularly...from both my stepdad and my shop teacher. They be shocked at all the repairs I've learned to do.


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## Storm

*I Know What "Terminal" Means*

Dagmire (or "My Name Is Davis"),

Hey, I didn't mean any offense...I just didn't understand what you meant that your dad "taught" you to spend more time with your children by...dying?

You sounded sarcastic, brother. And I know sarcasm...but where's the forgiveness?

I remember one of my friends telling me that the biggest thing he learned from his dad was how NOT to be as a dad. I think that's sad.

So...tell me a few things about your dad that you remember that were good...if you're willing...


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## edb19

Richard King said:


> Did anything your parents used to say
> ...stick with you?



My mom - who faced 2 major cancers in her life . . . . 
"this too shall pass"

My dad - whenever he thought appropriate . . . . 
"You're cruising for a bruising." (and no, I wasn't remotely a battered child, it was just a saying he had)


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## MrMerlin777

edb19 said:


> My mom - who faced 2 major cancers in her life . . . .
> "this too shall pass"
> 
> My dad - whenever he thought appropriate . . . .
> "You're cruising for a bruising." (and no, I wasn't remotely a battered child, it was just a saying he had)



A friend of mine (also not remotely a battered child), his dad used to say,"I'll knock you inta next week if ya don't shut up!!"


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## Bandguy

Because I am your father and I said so. That's the only reason I need.

You better stop your crying before I give you something to really cry about.

Don't you know that there are starving children in Ethiopia who would love to eat that spinach?

You are who you hang with.

You're not going anywhere, doing anything, or watching any tv until you finish your homework.

Anytime you think you are man enough, take your best shot, son. But I warn you. If you ever hit me, you better knock me out or kill me.

So, you're running away, eh son? Well, if you walk out that door, don't come back. We are changing the locks. This is not a revolving door.

I think all of these sayings were great and helped make me the wonderful person I am today.


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## kvanlaan

A favorite from my Mother: "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."


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## Puddleglum

Eddie . . . that's probably my mom's most-said phrase, too!

When we were little, my dad used to always say "mess around and you get hurt" - especially after we'd gotten hurt rough-housing.


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## kvanlaan

Rev. Kok,

"Pas op!" was also a favorite with the grandparents, as was "Tinker om, jongen..."


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## LadyFlynt

Just remembered my stepdad's favorite...

"This isn't a democracy; it's a dictatorship"


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## bookslover

MrMerlin777 said:


> He also said, "Opinions are like noses. Everyone has one."



From where I come from, that's the cleaned-up version!


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## bookslover

Bandguy said:


> Don't you know that there are starving children in Ethiopia who would love to eat that spinach?



I used to get that one all the time (from my mother). I'd always think, "Fine! Pack it all up and send it to them, then!"


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## Richard King

kvanlaan said:


> Rev. Kok,
> 
> "Pas op!" was also a favorite with the grandparents, as was "Tinker om, jongen..."




You gotta translate,
...or were they charismatic?


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## Bandguy

> I used to get that one all the time (from my mother). I'd always think, "Fine! Pack it all up and send it to them, then!"



I actually had the nerve to offer a 25 cent stamp so mom could mail it to them. I thought I was being compassionate. Mom thought I was being a smart aleck. She was probably right after further reflection.


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## edb19

LadyFlynt said:


> Just remembered my stepdad's favorite...
> 
> "This isn't a democracy; it's a dictatorship"



I remember saying that to my son once - I also mentioned the fact that I was the dictator, not my then ~8 year old son. I thought my dad was going to fall over laughing - I'm sure he had been waiting for years for a comment like that to come out of my mouth (and despaired of ever actually hearing it). 

My father-in-law (a hillbilly from West Virginia) used to say regarding children, "Doggone snipies, you ought to smack them every time you see them because sure as shooting if they aren't coming out of trouble they're going into it."

edie


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## Dagmire

Storm said:


> Dagmire (or "My Name Is Davis"),
> 
> Hey, I didn't mean any offense...I just didn't understand what you meant that your dad "taught" you to spend more time with your children by...dying?
> 
> You sounded sarcastic, brother. And I know sarcasm...but where's the forgiveness?
> 
> I remember one of my friends telling me that the biggest thing he learned from his dad was how NOT to be as a dad. I think that's sad.
> 
> So...tell me a few things about your dad that you remember that were good...if you're willing...




It wasn't so much sarcasm as it was the pain of a destroyed life seeping into my words. The Lord is mending me, but it is taking time. I know His timing is good, though.

And what about my words is unforgiving? His death ruined me. I don't blame him for it. I don't remember him teaching me much, but I was only a boy when he was alive. If the Lord blesses me with children, then I want to devote myself to them as much as I can. I want to teach them to walk in the Lord's ways and make them absolutely sure of how much I love them. I hardly think that's a bad thing to take a way from a bad experience. I know that wanting to do it and actually doing it are two different things, though.



I don't remember much about my dad. He was a pastor for a year or two before my birth until his death. He was considered a faithful and zealous Christian and a competent teacher. 




Well, I've been sitting here for about 10 minutes and I can't really think of anything to write about him. I just remember solitary events. I remember looking at a map and him being there and I saw the country Niger and I pronounced it like the racial slur and he told me never to say that word. 



Another 10 minutes has gone by. I give up. It's upsetting to me that I can't remember a significant amount of anything about that man. Oh well.


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## kvanlaan

> Originally Posted by kvanlaan
> Rev. Kok,
> 
> "Pas op!" was also a favorite with the grandparents, as was "Tinker om, jongen..."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You gotta translate,
> ...or were they charismatic?
Click to expand...


Nope, they were Dutch. The first one is (roughly) "look out!" The second, "You better watch yourself, boy..."


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## Richard King

I have some dear friends who lurk secretly and occassionally on the PB. 
The husband is a Baptist Preacher's boy. They sent me these sayings from their parents.


My dad said:

Your reputation will follow you everywhere you go,
Unless it's a bad reputation and then it'll beat you there.

We always told our kids:

Run with horse thieves, Hang with horse thieves.

I also told them alot:

You can always get want you want.....but if you try sometimes, you just might find...you get what you need.

Cloyce's dad had a whole list (hundreds of things) that he remembered his dad saying:

One I really liked was:

They'll put you so far in jail, they'll have to shoot you biscuits with a slingshot.


Another I always said was:

"Poof"----which meant go away quickly. If they didn't I would whisper in their ear telling them, "Make Mama's Magic work......Poof!


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## CalvinandHodges

Greetings:

When I was growing up:

"Clean your room"

 

-CH


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## Kristine with a K

Mom's advice to me was (is): "Just do your best." For a perfectionist, that's a hard pill to swallow. Sometimes my best isn't perfection.  

"What goes around, comes around." (This was usually told to me after I'd intentionally annoyed one of my big sisters. And believe me, it's still comin' 'round.)

Bad advice I got from a relative, "Don't get too close to a moving train; bullets shoot out and you'll get shot and die." Hm. A simple "Don't get too close to a moving train or you'll get spanked" would have been quite sufficient.


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## jenney

Dagmire said:


> His death ruined me.



I read this on Saturday night, Davis, and it reminded me of you:
_"All things work together for good." This must be so for three reasons.

First, because all things are under the absolute control of the Governor of the universe.
Second, because God desires our (His children's) good, and nothing but our good.
Third, because even Satan himself cannot touch a hair of our heads without God's permission, and then only for our further good.

Not all things are good in themselves, nor in their tendencies; but God makes all things work for our good. Nothing enters our life by blind chance; nor are there any accidents. Everything is being moved by God, with this end in view, our good.

Everything being subservient to God's eternal purpose, works blessing to those marked out for conformity to the miage of the Firstborn. *All suffering, sorrow, loss, are used by our Father to minister to the benefit of His elect.*_

from AW Pink, Comfort for Christians, boldface mine.

All the best to you, brother.


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## JonathanHunt

My mum's best advice to me, when I told her I was in love with a single mother 8 years my senior...

'Only two things matter. Does she love the Lord, and does she love you?'

She did, and she did.


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## ajrock2000

"I don't think you are saved." -Dad


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## Michael

"You've missed your opportunity to be silent."


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## Ivan

bookslover said:


> From where I come from, that's the cleaned-up version!



Indeed!


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## Ivan

My Dad often said, "Can't isn't in our vocabulary."

I saw him do some pretty amazing things on the farm.


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## jenney

Ivan said:


> My Dad often said, "Can't isn't in our vocabulary."



A friend at church told me his dad always said, "Can't lives on Won't Street," and we say that to our kids who tend, sadly, toward being quitters.


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## Swampguy

Dad: Save 10 cents of ever dollar you make. I now own a house and two cars with no debt.
Don't get her in trouble (our sex talk)
Mom: never draw to an inside straight


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