# THUG LOVE- What's up with some teen girls?



## ReformedWretch (Jul 16, 2006)

Ok, can someone explain to me why what appears to be sane, decent, attractive, smart, young ladies like two bit wanna be thug rapper boys?

Seriosuly, it completely mystifies me. THANK THE LORD Jesus that the girls I work with are NOT attracted to this nonsense, but the ones I used to work with sure are.

For example, my wife and I are very close to an attractive, white (not that color matters but I wanted to mention it just in case), seventeen year old young lady from a small town (not in the sticks, but not the City either) who just LOVES these boys who dress like Snoop Dog and talk (AND WRITE!!!!) in some jive ghetto language that when read makes the reader sound more like Forrest Gump than Jay-Z if you ask me.

For example, here are some comments from some of her friends on My Space. I read these for entertainment! Seriously, when I need a good laugh I go to her site and read her comments. It's sad that she likes this stuff, but reading the way these other people write to her makes me laugh until I cry.

Here are a few: (If there are curse words in these forgive me, I tried to spot them best I could)

wats craccin wit chu ma nigga yea u real funny wit dat akon shyt huh but u kno i had ta com show ya page som luv nd watch keep up wit dat akon shyt imma 6eat cha azz

wat it is yung sis hows thangs goin eh im makin an appeareance soon aite so stay up tell our niggas tha boi skippa is throwin a bash wen i cum back ya herd n only eastside cats n dogs can cum n othas if i say so but holla at me luv ya

yea i got ya numba ama halla at u sum timz agt..

Wat Iz Up Ma Sexy A$$ *censored*in friend..lol..daz rih da badest chicaZ up in diz biotch!!!....lol...but yea even though u right next to me..lol ima show ur page some love...even though i think personally needs a lil update...lol oh wait there are some..lol..ima keep typin cuz i wanna leave a long ass comment...so chris(even though u right next to me) whea ma cheese doodles nigka! lol..im bored.. ;-(..oh but wait chris do u kno wha time it is..huh..do ya...its peanut butter jelly time..its peanut butter jelly time..lol...but anyways...ummm what else...um...u are my sunshine ma only sunshine u make me happy wen clouds are gray...u neva notice how much i love u..plz dont take my sunshine away...lol..love ya..
THE END...

WATS POPPIN FRESH HOLLA AT ME AITE KEEP DEM LITES OFF U KNO I HAD TO DROP SUM LUV ON YA

-------

Ok, those are just a FEW comments on her site.

Can someone, anyone answer me when I seriously ask

What is this all about?


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## Bandguy (Jul 16, 2006)

Image.

Peer Pressure.

Media.

Rebellion.

Post Modern Amoral mindset.


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 16, 2006)

All good answers I suppose, but I want to dig at this as much as possible. someone suggested to me it was about security and that guys who profess/pretend (or really are) thugs seem "strong" and "protective" to young insecure girls. That makes sense to me I guess, but it still fasinates me.


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## ChristianTrader (Jul 16, 2006)

Why you be hatin  As the old proverb says, "Hate the game, not the player."

Now that the jest portion of the post is done, time for a bit of seriousness. I could actually be offended that you feel necessary to single out the thug rapper version of the stereotypical "badboy". What is so different about the thug rapper vs. the other versions of badboys that women (usually younger) tend to go for at some point in life.

Is not thug love just a newer version of "badboy" love?

CT


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 16, 2006)

I dunno...is it? Thugs are white and black and the most successful rapper (from my understanding) is Eminem. It may have started with the black culture, but it's certainly not remained there. The bad boys that I remember in school weren't all that "bad". Maybe if you explain how you see or saw "bad-boys"?


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## turmeric (Jul 16, 2006)

*Warning!!! This post may contain psychobabble. If you, or anyone you know is allergic to psychobabble, please skip this post!*

I read somewhere that girls are attracted to (insert undesirable male type here), because thery are actually looking for Alpha males, the better to protect them and their young'uns. They mistake bombast and rage for strength.


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 16, 2006)

Ecellent point Josh! Mettrosexuality makes me want to vomit. So in a way the "bad-boys" are rebelling against that possibly? One of my main points is the language though, what is it about the kind of writing I've posted here that some young people see as cool or even "bad"? Look, we all use some slang and that's fine, but at seventeen, eighteen years of age why would you still find that cool, fun, etc.? Is there something about it I am not understanding? I work with plenty of young kids who like hip-hop music who don't talk like that and if they do, they certainly don't write like that.

I am just amazed at the difference. At one place I worked with street kids who loved rap and hip hop and they evolved into the characters in the videos and movies. At another place (current place) they enjoy the same things yet do not evolve into what they see on the screen (big or small screen). I have no idea what the difference is between the children though. The first set seem lost when it comes to direction while my current set seem able to seperate entertainment from real life.


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## panta dokimazete (Jul 16, 2006)

One of my pop-culture childhood heros:








vs.

[before editing - tis was a picture of Eminem - showing off his tats and flipping the bird - really wanted to illustrate the contrast...but no worries...]


<hr>

...hmmm...

[Edited on 7-16-2006 by jdlongmire]

[Edited on 7-17-2006 by LadyFlynt]

[Edited on 7-17-2006 by jdlongmire]


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## panta dokimazete (Jul 16, 2006)

> _Originally posted by ChristianTrader_
> Why you be hatin  As the old proverb says, "Hate the game, not the player."
> 
> Now that the jest portion of the post is done, time for a bit of seriousness. I could actually be offended that you feel necessary to single out the thug rapper version of the stereotypical "badboy". What is so different about the thug rapper vs. the other versions of badboys that women (usually younger) tend to go for at some point in life.
> ...



Yeea dawg, don't be hatin!










no different than the glam/metal/thrash, etc... badboys - "itching ears syndrome" - anything counter to the moral desires of the parent...rebellion in its simplest sense...the age old problem and the fruit of the Fall.



-JD

[Edited on 7-16-2006 by jdlongmire]


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## Puritan Sailor (Jul 16, 2006)

Adam, I think the language part of your question really revolves around our innate desire to be part of something bigger than ourselves, to be part of a community without losing our identity altogether. Perhaps it's similar to the gang mentality being preached through the music. These kids think it's cool to have a unique language and culture which makes them different from the dominant culture. It gives them a meaning to life and a common cultural framework to live out that meaning. Christians do this to with the "born again" sub-cultural language which the culture at large does not really understand.


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## LadyFlynt (Jul 16, 2006)

Ditto to Meg and Josh. Also, if any of these young ladies are reading trashy romance novels (p*rn for females), those books push the alpha male role.

On the writing issue...many of us grew up using "cool" words or phrases. Also wrote in lingo (acronyms were popular when I was in highschool...and online they still are). It's an identity thing...until they grow up and get their own...

(did not know that word was censorable...and yet, that bird flying a few posts up isn't...)

(ha! realized this was a forum I CAN work on)

[Edited on 7-17-2006 by LadyFlynt]

[Edited on 7-17-2006 by LadyFlynt]


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## Pilgrim (Jul 16, 2006)

They do it for the same reason many get tattoos and put metal in their face and elsewhere. They do not realize that in their desire to rebel that they have simply fallen for another form of conformity.


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Jul 17, 2006)

Rebels without a cause usually end up east of Eden.


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## CDM (Jul 17, 2006)

[Warning: The following are my opinions based on a lifetime of observation and experience mixed with a better than average understanding of how God made the woman for the man and all this entails]

Women, in general, are attracted to what's known as an "Alpha male". And someone mentioned this earlier: that this ridiculous (bad-boy rapper/other) type of pseudo-machismo is a facade of strength and Alpha-male-ness. In fact you'll find it´s mostly the beta and gammas who engage in such delusional flattery.

Plain old fashioned acting really. 

Much of my experience growing up as violent unbelieving antichrist attests to the veracity of this belief. I've seen Alpha, beta, and the gammas in various situations behave and you'll know, without a doubt, who is the real deal, and who are the posers. The costumes they wear and the accents they adopt fall quickly away when real danger presents itself. 



> _Originally posted by Pilgrim_
> They do it for the same reason many get tattoos and put metal in their face and elsewhere. They do not realize that in their desire to rebel that they have simply fallen for another form of conformity.





Yes, that is the laughable irony of it. Their attempts to not conform to abc results in them conforming to xyz. Complete with costumes and tattoos to better represent their conformity!


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## Texas Aggie (Jul 17, 2006)

Women who are wooed by thugs have a low self esteem. A woman´s father is to blame for the tragedy. Fathers need to tell their daughters how beautiful, intelligent and spiritually attractive they are from the very, very beginning. Daughters need to hear this everyday of their life from their fathers until they are given over to marriage. Otherwise, you (as a father) can expect your daughter to be attracted only to garbage.

A woman´s high self esteem convicts her to be selective in her choice of men. Physical, mental and spiritual attractiveness in a mate thus becomes the sought after traits in a young fellow. Low self esteem in all three areas (physical looks, mental ability and spiritual maturity) will only attract individuals of like-mindedness.

Fathers must love their wives and visibly demonstrate this love to their daughters in order to make complimentary statements credible. A father shows a daughter how a man is to treat a woman through their relationship to their spouse. Proper grooming, behavior and spiritual leadership are to be conveyed from an early age all the way to adulthood. You can expect your daughter to pick up somebody you directly reflect in your daily behavior.


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## Pilgrim (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by mangum_
> [Warning: The following are my opinions based on a lifetime of observation and experience mixed with a better than average understanding of how God made the woman for the man and all this entails]
> 
> Women, in general, are attracted to what's known as an "Alpha male". And someone mentioned this earlier: that this ridiculous (bad-boy rapper/other) type of pseudo-machismo is a facade of strength and Alpha-male-ness. In fact you'll find it´s mostly the beta and gammas who engage in such delusional flattery.
> ...



And usually it's a conformity or bondage that is as bad or worse than what they rebelled against. 

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.... 

(Can't let Andrew have all the pop culture references.  )


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## Pilgrim (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by VirginiaHuguenot_
> Rebels without a cause usually end up east of Eden.





Good one, Andrew.


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by Pilgrim_
> Meet the new boss, same as the old boss....
> 
> (Can't let Andrew have all the pop culture references.  )





Bumper sticker:


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 17, 2006)




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## LadyFlynt (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by VirginiaHuguenot_
> 
> 
> > _Originally posted by Pilgrim_
> ...



We are?!


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by LadyFlynt_
> 
> 
> > _Originally posted by VirginiaHuguenot_
> ...



 Not "nonconformists" as in _Puritan dissenters_ or _Christians_ but rather as in _rebels without a cause_.


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 17, 2006)

> _Originally posted by LadyFlynt_
> 
> 
> > _Originally posted by VirginiaHuguenot_
> ...



Well, it would be nice if those of us not conforming to the "world" would be very similar!


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## govols (Jul 18, 2006)

Nuther bumper sticker:

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.


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## kceaster (Jul 18, 2006)

Though I do not disagree with most of the posts, I would slant a bit and say that young ladies are looking for men with chests. But as Lewis put it, we're raising up young lads who don't have them. And so our ladies go on looking for cheap imitations.

In my humble opinion,

KC


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## ReformedWretch (Jul 18, 2006)

My dad used to ask me (when I got a little full of myself..imagine that!!)

"Do you want a medal boy, or a chest to pin it on?"


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