# Divorce, Remarriage, then Coming to Faith



## RefPres1647 (Dec 24, 2018)

Hi all,

Completely hypothetical and based on a situation that has happened to someone I know that isn't a Christian.

If someone who isn't a Christian gets married, divorced (for unbiblical reasons), remarried to someone else, and then comes to faith, what is the proper response to the sin of being married to someone else while being divorced for reasons of, what we can call, inconvenience?

Would staying married to the second person be considered adultery and then show that the person isn't truly showing spiritual fruit? Would God consider the divorce valid if it was done as a non-Christian? Would he be expected to care for this new spouse even though it could potentially be sinful?

Like I said, this is just a random hypothetical and an interested in seeing what scripture may have to say about this in case this example ever came to fruition in anyone I know.


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## Jack K (Dec 24, 2018)

Stay married to the second spouse, and be faithful in every way. True, the person should not have remarried. But now that it is done, forsaking the second spouse would only compound the sin.

Sometimes, when we come to repentance we are able to undo our past sins, to some extent, and make things right again. Other times, the damage has been done and repairs are not so simple. In the case of a person who has remarried, it is too late to go back and try to undo things.

Reactions: Like 8 | Edifying 1


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## Reformed Covenanter (Dec 24, 2018)

I agree with Jack. As the horse has bolted from the stable, going back to the first marriage is not an option nor is ending the second marriage proper. Repentance, in this scenario, involves making the best of a bad situation in a fallen world, staying faithful to the current spouse, and resolving not to divorce and remarry for unbiblical reasons again. 

The situation is analogous to a professing Christian marrying an unbeliever. The person needs to repent of the sin of marrying the unbeliever, but repentance does not involve breaking a marriage that was sinfully contracted. Instead, it involves being faithful to the unbelieving spouse and seeking to win them for Christ.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Edward (Dec 24, 2018)

And one must interact with Deuteronomy 24:1-4. Leaving the current spouse and returning to the first one is not an option.

Reactions: Like 1


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## RefPres1647 (Dec 24, 2018)

Jack K said:


> Stay married to the second spouse, and be faithful in every way. True, the person should not have remarried. But now that it is done, forsaking the second spouse would only compound the sin.
> 
> Sometimes, when we come to repentance we are able to undo our past sins, to some extent, and make things right again. Other times, the damage has been done and repairs are not so simple. In the case of a person who has remarried, it is too late to go back and try to undo things.



That makes a lot of sense. I guess my thought process was trying to be more meticulous rather than practical which is why I felt the need to post. Thanks!


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## Jeri Tanner (Dec 24, 2018)

God is gracious and merciful.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Dachaser (Dec 24, 2018)

RefPres1647 said:


> Hi all,
> 
> Completely hypothetical and based on a situation that has happened to someone I know that isn't a Christian.
> 
> ...


God description of marriage in the NT would seem to be from the position of at least one of the parties involved were really saved and in a relationship with God, so in this scenario laid out here, would think that God would not have them re divorce again , but to stay with the current spouse and do their due diligence to make sure that this second one would be until death do them part.


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## Jerusalem Blade (Dec 26, 2018)

Hello Jordan, this little book (99 pages) by Jay E. Adams, _Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the Bible_, is considered by many in the Reformed churches to be the best on the topic. Some disagree, but it is the general consensus.

Reactions: Like 1 | Informative 2


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## Berean by Grace (Dec 26, 2018)

Jeri Tanner said:


> God is gracious and merciful.


Jeri Tanner: I see Birmingham on your post. Greetings from Cullman!


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## Jeri Tanner (Dec 26, 2018)

Berean by Grace said:


> Jeri Tanner: I see Birmingham on your post. Greetings from Cullman!


Oh, hello neighbor! Not too far away at all. We were there (well, in Vinemont) visiting a niece just a week ago or so.  What church do you attend?


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## Berean by Grace (Jan 2, 2019)

I'm embarrassed to say...... but it is an SBC in Mt. Olive. A good friend pastors there. I teach the older adult Sunday morning class and my wife teaches the women. Our pastor friend has been trying to change the atmosphere there for years. My wife and I came in a couple of years ago to help teach Reformed Theology. A continuous struggle! My wife and I have been desiring to attend Christ Covenant Presbyterian in Cullman. It would be a much better fit and I wouldn't have to restrain my tongue so much.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Jeri Tanner (Jan 3, 2019)

Oh interesting! I know how tough that must be. We have family in Hayden who need to find a church. They’re credobaptist and not reformed but are beginning to think a little more about theological matters (I hope). Do you think this church is basically sound enough to recommend to someone like that? If so I’d like to know the name of it- you can pm me if you prefer.


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## Berean by Grace (Jan 4, 2019)

Calcedonia Baptist Church
5438 Mt Olive Road
Gardendale, AL 35071

This is a lot better choice for a Baptist Church in Northern Jefferson County. There are several Churches on this side of the county that are KJV-Only Churches, so tell them to be careful.
Our lead pastor uses the KJV in the service, but he is not KJV Only type. He actually uses the NASB in personal study.
Pastor's names is Danny Miller. Tell them I am the one who looks like Charles Spurgeon. (Chubby fellow with a beard).
If they want to come to Sunday School, then they can come to my class. A couple does not have to split up.
I hope to see them there!

Reactions: Like 1


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## Jeri Tanner (Jan 4, 2019)

Thank you, I’ll pass this along!


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