# Bagpiping Celts! and Caledonian Calvinists! and the Adventures of Astroscot Will McNeil



## Puritanhead (Jan 28, 2006)

For optimal viewing pleasure hit your F11 key








Selections from the VMI Pipe Band

I have an Anglish surname, and I'm only half-Celtic!! But I am feeling all Scottish today!

[Edited on 1-29-2006 by Puritanhead]

[Edited on 1-30-2006 by Puritanhead]


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Jan 28, 2006)

One of the most moving moments I have experienced was listening to the Edinburgh Military Tattoo perform Psalm 23 to the tune Crimond in the Edinburgh Castle.


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## Puritanhead (Jan 28, 2006)

Aye! You tell that atheist, bunch of heathen on the school board, that Groundskeeper Willy will stand up for Jesus, and hand out Bible tracts to the wee little schoolchildren!


http://www.simpsonstrivia.com.ar/simpsons-photos/wallpapers/groundskeeper-wille.jpg

[Edited on 1-29-2006 by Puritanhead]


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## LawrenceU (Jan 28, 2006)

Play on. Play on. Music to warm the blood and inspire the heart.


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## Puritanhead (Jan 28, 2006)

"Matthew McMahon is seven foot tall and if HE were here, he'd consume the Arminians with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse."
:bigsmile:











[size=-1]Yeah, I really need to stop watching Braveheart[/size]


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## RamistThomist (Jan 28, 2006)

> _Originally posted by Puritanhead_
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I got to save the wee turtles. If I don't save the wee turtles, who wull?
(later, with a bunch of snapping turtles latched on to Willie)
"Acghck! Save me from the wee turtles! They were too big for me!"


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## Puritanhead (Jan 28, 2006)

> _Originally posted by Draught Horse_
> I got to save the wee turtles. If I don't save the wee turtles, who wull?
> (later, with a bunch of snapping turtles latched on to Willie)
> "Acghck! Save me from the wee turtles! They were too big for me!"



Groundskeeper Willy WAV file


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## Puritanhead (Jan 29, 2006)

Robert the Bruce!


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## Scot (Jan 29, 2006)

This is the most awesome thread that I've seen so far on the board.


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

**Here is an excerpt from a book _Partisans and Redcoats : The Southern Conflict That Turned the Tide of the American Revolution_, which I found particularly funny about Presbyterian-Anglican relations in the backcountry of South Carolina in the mid-eighteenth century in the years before the War for Independence. It is told from the perspective a missionary of English pedigree who was sent to one of the token Anglican parishes in the Carolina backcountry. I found this story rather amusing... Anyway, jump ahead to page nine if you want to get to the gist of the story. FYI The quotations are the words of Rev. Woodmason, an Anglican clergyman.



> [p. 5]
> The Scots-Irish were proud of their heritage. They were, first of all, Scots. They knew their nation's tortured history and its mistreatment by the English. They were fervent Presbyterians whose forebears had been persecuted for their beliefs. They were family men and women and tended to stick close by their kinfolks.
> 
> ...
> ...









































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## Mike (Jan 30, 2006)




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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

[align=center]"Ne Oublie - Don't Forget"








[/align]


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## jfschultz (Jan 30, 2006)

Ok, Ok, I guess it is high time that I change my avatar.

Buaidh No Bas!


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

August 2005, marks 700 Years since the execution of Scotland's Favorite Son William Wallace, at the hand of King Edward, or "Longshanks"...
Braveheart

"Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take our FREEDOM!!!" 
-- William Wallace (Braveheart)


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## VirginiaHuguenot (Jan 30, 2006)




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## LadyFlynt (Jan 30, 2006)

Matt was looking a little pale in that kilt there


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

> _Originally posted by LadyFlynt_
> Matt was looking a little pale in that kilt there



You would have a flush complexion too... if you were wearing at kilt with no underwear on in 40 degree weather.


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

*The Adventures of AstroScot Will McNeil*

The First British-Initiated European Union Lunar Landing. 2018.



*London:* "Lunar Astronaut McNeil, this is London, do you read us?"

*McNeil:* "Aye! AstroScot McNeil here!!! 

*London:* "McNeil, You're under expressed orders to put a European flag on the moon. This is an historic year with the entry of Russia into the EU! Don't let us down!"

*McNeil:* "No problem London... we've got our _special-issue_ solar radiation-resitant flag unfurled to fly for eternity."

_...McNeil laughs..._

*London:* "What are you laughing at McNeil?"

*McNeil:* "Far off in sunlit places  
Sad are the Scottish faces,  
Yearning to feel the kiss  
Of sweet Scottish rain.  
Where the tropics are beaming" 

*London:* "McNeil, how about something for His Majesty? Or European Union solidarity?"

_...McNeil belches loudly..._

*London:* "MCNEIL!!!"

*McNeil:* "Excuse me... Must of been the freezed-dried haggis I ate..."

_...five minutes later..._

*McNeil:* "One small step for man, and one giant leap for...... Acghck!"

_...abrupt break of silence..._

*London:* "Astronaut, this is London do you read us?"

*McNeil:* "Aye! London we have a problem!!!"

*London:* "We read you McNeil. What's that?"

*McNeil:* "You made my lanyard too short!!! I tripped up.... it appears to be broken!!!"

_silent static for a few seconds..._

*McNeil:* "Now I am flying away!!! You damned English [email protected]#@[email protected]%"


Astroscot Lt. Col. William McNeil, British Royal Air Force, 1978 to 2018.








[Edited on 1-30-2006 by Puritanhead]


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## LadyFlynt (Jan 30, 2006)




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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

Tune into AstroScot Neil McNeil's Funeral Ballad

_...Four days later amidst much official pomp and military ceremony..._

*Rev. James MacGregor*: "There were no braver Scots than Will McNeil. A man wild in his youth to be sure, but born of the Spirit, he was a man of God, and definitely a Son of Scotland."

*Rev. James MacGregor*: "The European Parliament was outraged that that Scotsman put the Saint Andrews Cross on the Moon, but he would have made Ian Paisley proud!"

_...congregation laughs... his wife sobs..._

*Rev. James MacGregor*: "McNeil was a man firmly committed to the doctrines of grace. McNeil was a sinner saved by grace. Now let us mourn his passing with Amazing Grace!"

*Congregation Sings:* Amazing grace! How sweet the sound 
That saved a wretch like me! 
I once was lost, but now am found; 
Was blind, but now I see.  
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear, 
And grace my fears relieved; 
How precious did that grace appear 
The hour I first believed. 
......
......
......
......

*Rev. James MacGregor*: "Take heart brothers and sisters, Second Corinthians Five tell us, For we know to be absent from the _moon_ is to be in the presence of the Lord."

_...congregation laughs... his wife sobs even louder..._

*Rev. James MacGregor*: "Sorry, I meant to say, to be absent from the body means to be in the presence of the Lord.... Alzheimers has got the better of this seventy-five year old Scottish Bible preacher."





Bagpiping Services courtesy of Scotia Bagpipers

Will McNeil-- Gone but not forgotten!


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## Ivan (Jan 30, 2006)

This is an AWESOME thread!! Ye put a happy smile on my face!!


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

Ian, the wayward son of Glasgow Presbyterian minister was returning home from the pub, smelling like a distillery.

He flopped on a bus seat next to a Catholic Priest. His tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of whiskey was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. Then he asked the priest, "What causes arthritis?"

"Well my son, it's the result of loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much whisky and a contempt for your fellow man."

"Well I'll be damned!" Ian muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, feeling a little guilty, said, "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't, Father. But I was just reading here that the Pope does."

:bigsmile:


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## Puritanhead (Jan 30, 2006)

Jacob the Aitken


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## LawrenceU (Jan 30, 2006)

> You would have a flush complexion too... if you were wearing at kilt with no underwear on in 40 degree weather.



Nay, that shodna do it. The feileadh mhor is quite warm; even when it is very cold.


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## PuritanCovenanter (Jan 30, 2006)

*We arnt forgettun!*

[Edited on 1-31-2006 by puritancovenanter]


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## Puritanhead (Jan 31, 2006)

Confederate Willy?!?!?!
:bigsmile:


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## Puritanhead (Jun 12, 2006)

I'm gonna preach in a kilt one day


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## ~~Susita~~ (Jun 13, 2006)

A Bellendaine!


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