# Cookbook



## py3ak

I hate most flavors/textures.

Heidi wants a cookbook for her anniversary.

Being a good wife, she does not want this for the purpose of inflicting misery, but for the purpose of improved knowledge of how to manipulate food so as to make it acceptable.

I am from a Pennsylvania Dutch background, but consider scrapple, beets, and sauerkraut about all equally abominable. Also I don't like casseroles. Or vegetables. Or fruit. Or spices. Or herbs. Or intestines.

With that in mind - cookbook recommendations anyone?


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## Pilgrim Standard

How about 
How to Cook Meat
Amazon.com: How to Cook Meat (9780060507718): Christopher Schlesinger, John Willoughby: Books

The Complete Meat Cookbook
Amazon.com: The Complete Meat Cookbook (9780618135127): Bruce Aidells, Denis Kelly: Books

Or 
Steaks, Chops, Roasts & Ribs
Amazon.com: Steaks, Chops, Roasts & Ribs (9780936184784): Editors of Cook's Illustrated Magazine: Books


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## Elizabeth

This is about the best all around cookbook, In my humble opinion: Amazon.com: The New Best Recipe: All-New Edition (9780936184746): Cook's Illustrated Magazine, John Burgoyne, Carl Tremblay, Daniel J. Van Ackere: Books


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## py3ak

I don't think we need an all-around cookbook. More like "The Hyper-picky Eater's Guide to Plain Food."


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## Laura

Elizabeth, I am a _Cook's Illustrated_ slave and would also recommend their stuff to almost anybody, but I don't think you fully understand the extent of Ruben's...uniqueness.  I am at a loss as to what to recommend, other than maybe Cook's Country--a branch of Cook's Illustrated but more down-home, simple, non-fussy recipes that might just someday yield something Ruben would like.
Edit: then again, that book does have a lot of casseroles. This might be fitting, and you can look at some of the recipes in detail if you scroll down. (I can't do a link properly for some reason: http://www.amazon.com/Americas-Test-Kitchen-Family-Cookbook/dp/1933615486/ref=pd_sim_b_13 )


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## VictorBravo

Ruben, steam some chicken breast, shred it, and put it on a gluten-free tortilla. No toppings. Wash it down with some prune juice. 

It's straightforward and the ordeal is over quickly.

If you need vegetables, zucchini squash microwaved does the job. Bland enough, too.

If you want to get fancy, you can pressure cook the chicken with the squash. Cook it until it is mush and pour into a mug. Let it cool some and swig it down in a gulp or two. That gets the job done even quicker.


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## Quatchu

My wife as well as others i know like "The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Recipes from an Accidental Country Girl" more of a country cookbook with allot of meat and potato type stuff.


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## SolaScriptura

God has graced you with a remarkably long-suffering wife, Ruben. There is no way I'd suffer that type of hyper pickiness when it comes to eating.


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## py3ak

Thank you, Laura: I appreciate your understanding.

Ben, I knew there was a reason things would never work between us.

Thanks, Justin!

Vic, _prune juice_ and _zucchini squash_? Apparently I failed to make myself clear.


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## py3ak

Sadly, bats also need nourishment.


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## GulfCoast Presbyterian

Pizza?


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## py3ak

Not normally: it is goopy and often contains many pointless ingredients. I regard it as a migraine medicine rather than as a food.


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## Rufus

[video=youtube;Uj9CysSSsps]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uj9CysSSsps&feature=related[/video]


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## py3ak

I don't think Heidi will know what to do with some Rhino Beetle Larvae or insect blood unless we get the cookbook first.

She expands:



> I should clarify: it's not so much that I want a cookbook that specialises only in meat and potatoes: that would be nice, but I doubt it exists. I am more interested in a cookbook that teaches one how to cook: what different knives and spices are for. For instance I have been given a knife block but I have no idea what I am supposed to do with each of the knives: I have always had one or two dull knives from the dollar store and credit the vast number of my years to their exceeding dullness (I'm a little terrified of having somewhat sharper ones: this is still Walmart brand though, so I am not as terrified as I could be). I am currently reading through Home Comforts (thank you Laura for the recommendation and Jessica S for the book itself) and there is significantly more useful information than I can find in my Betty Crocker cookbook on dubious points, and enough vital information that I can at least intelligibly google some more (for instance, I found out that something on the block I assumed was used to prod clams at a distance or some such is actually the knife sharpener. Giggles.) but it isn't really enough. I have a meat pounder but I don't understand the logic of pounding meat: I would do it for sheer joy but am afraid it will ruin something. Recipes are fine and I do want more recipes: I inherited a few from Ruben's mom and mostly discarded those I grew up with (large inexpensive casserole dishes, mostly): but I don't really want just a collection of recipes. Nor do I want a nostalgic journey through Amish country and the history of local businesses and traditions with some nice illustrations of food my husband mostly won't eat. I want to learn how to cook. Whether or not I use all the information is irrelevant. Elizabeth and Laura, would you say the cookbooks you recommend do that or is there something else you would recommend, in this case?
> 
> My own diet is also necessarily finicky with being gluten and other allergens free. I can always look recipes up online: I just have no idea how to begin organising the information into some sort of useful approach to cooking on my own. (Remember the Chocolate Gob . . . And the spur of the moment decision to use up the old maple syrup in the polenta . . .)


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## VictorBravo

py3ak said:


> Vic, prune juice and zucchini squash? Apparently I failed to make myself clear.



Forgive me. I certainly was off the mark. May I suggest boiled turnips and a mid-priced Columbia Valley Riesling?


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## Edward

py3ak said:


> Also I don't like ... Or vegetables.



Must not be using enough salted pork fat with the vegetables.


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## JoannaV

Oh I do love Heidi! Whenever she writes she makes me smile!


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## Laura

Heidi, the wonderful thing about Cook's Illustrated/Cook's Country is that, rather than being primers on cooking in general, they have different topical books (there is a "Best Chicken Recipe" for instance) that teach you to cook dishes of varying difficulty as you go. It's much more than just individual recipes thrown at you with the assumption that you have a certain amount of cooking knowledge. Besides lots of helpful sidebars featuring particular ingredients, techniques (e.g. what on earth to do to fennel to get it into the thin slices the recipe calls for), they basically assume, every time they develop and write a recipe, that you know next to nothing about cooking/baking, or about any slightly atypical ingredients (that part is probably not applicable to you, but they will go into detail about what the ingredient is/isn't, whether or not you can make substitutions, etc.). They head off any substitution disasters from the start, by emphasizing, for example, that you want pearl barley rather than regular hulled barley. Anyway, since neither of you would be eating barley, let me give you an example. This may be something Ruben would actually like so I will include the whole recipe verbatim.

Chicken cordon bleu
Serves 2
To help prevent the filling from leaking, use large (8 oz) chicken breasts and thoroughly chill the stuffed breasts before breading. We like Black Forest ham in this recipe.

4 thin slices deli ham (about 4 oz.)
4 oz. Swiss cheese, shredded (about 1 cup)
2 (8-oz) boneless, skinless chicken breasts, trimmed
12 Ritz crackers, finely crumbled
3/4 c. panko bread crumbs
3 Tbsp. unsalted butter, melted
1/3 c. unbleached all-purpose flour (they always use unbleached by default, but the world won't end if you use bleached)
1 large egg
1 Tbsp. Dijon mustard (which of course you could leave out or substitute regular mustard if that is inoffensive)

1. Adjust oven racks to lowest and middle positions and heat oven to 450. Following photos (there are 3 photos that show you how to prepare the chicken in detail), top each ham slice with 1/4 cup cheese and roll up tightly. Pat chicken dry with paper towels. Cut deep pocket in thickest part of breast and stuff each breast with 2 ham-and-cheese rolls. Season chicken all over with salt and pepper, cover, and refrigerate for at least 20 minutes.
2. Meanwhile, toss cracker crumbs and panko with the melted butter and bake on rimmed baking sheet on middle rack, stirring occasionally, until light brown,a about 3-5 minutes. Let crumbs cool slightly.
3. Place flour in shallow dish. Beat egg and mustard together in second shallow dish/plate. Spread cooled crumb mixture in third shallow dish/plate. Dredge one stuffed chicken breast lightly in flour, shaking off excess. Coat in egg mixture, allowing excess to drop off, then dredge in crumbs, pressing to adhere. Transfer to a clean baking sheet. Repeat with remaining stuffed chicken breast. Uncooked stuffed and breaded chicken may be refrigerated in an airtight container for up to 24 hours.
4. Bake on the lowest oven rack until the bottom of chicken is golden brown, about 10 minutes. Move baking sheet to middle rack, reduce oven temperature to 400 degrees, and bake until chicken is golden brown and registers 160-165 on an instant-read thermometer, 18-24 minutes. Transfer to platter and let rest for 5 minutes before serving.

That is from one of their Cooking for Two books, which present the obvious advantage of already having the recipes scaled down to serve two; so if the dish wasn't a hit, you don't have tons of leftovers to reckon with by yourself. This particular book features many recipes Ruben would not be interested in, but like I said, just reading through the recipes you will learn about cooking. On a recipe for Thai red curry with shrimp, there is a large box with information on shrimp sizing (what "21-25 per pound" means), how to efficiently cut carrots into matchsticks, and how to devein shrimp.

So that is my plug for this style of learning to cook. I have a Julia Child compendium (Julia's Kitchen Wisdom) which I thought would be a good starter book. It does have some useful charts for times and methods of preparing lots of different vegetables, but the problem is that she doesn't get specific enough for me, like she tends to assume I know more than I do about French food. As a novice I want the most specific directions, visual cues, etc. Cook's Illustrated will give you that. If they don't answer any questions that arise when I want to take on one of their recipes, I just google it and eventually will find the answer. Foodsubs.com is a nice reference for when you want to know the difference between cuts of meat (which are often bewilderingly named different things in different parts of the country), for example.


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## Southern Presbyterian

Then I don't suppose you'd be interested in one of these?

View attachment 2443


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## py3ak

VictorBravo said:


> py3ak said:
> 
> 
> 
> Vic, prune juice and zucchini squash? Apparently I failed to make myself clear.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Forgive me. I certainly was off the mark. May I suggest boiled turnips and a mid-priced Columbia Valley Riesling?
Click to expand...


Recently, I secretly placed some boiled chayote in a ziploc bag to avoid having to consume it; turnips would be no better.



Edward said:


> Must not be using enough salted pork fat with the vegetables.


You can add "fat" to the list of things I don't like.



Laura said:


> This may be something Ruben would actually like


Sorry, afraid not. I don't like Swiss cheese, I don't like mustard, and I don't like things that are this elaborate. I had it once and it wasn't as unacceptable as some other things, though.

James, I threated Kevin with an infraction when he had the gall to make one of those his avatar one time.


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## jwithnell

Joy of Cooking. It gives clear explanations regarding different ingredients and methods of cooking. It covers the gamut from plain and simple to snooty. I taught myself to cook with it at about age 14 and it has been the backbone of my cookbook library ever since. Get the 75th Anniversary edition. The other newer editions are way out of line with the historical mindset of "Joy."


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## a mere housewife

Laura, what a wonderful post, just what I would expect from my awe-inspiringly kitchen savvy friend ; thank you so much. I have the most accomplished and helpful friends. It offsets the despair over my own cluelessness 

Joanna, I'm glad my ignorance makes someone smile besides just myself (I'm afraid if I didn't laugh over it, I would end up in tears: I have actually been cooking whole meals ever since I could read my mom's instructions and stand on a chair at the stove, pretending to be a sea cook in a dingy place below deck, boiling octopus for the wretched crew -- but I never learned anything much beyond the recipes I used. I still only possess about four spices, and only understand the use of two of them .

I think I may, in keeping with Jean's suggestion and after poking around a bit this morning, request _The Joy of Cooking_. Jean, would you suggest the anniversary edition over the facsimile of the original? It sounds like it is a very enjoyable read, at the least, and a good place to begin, in being so. Perhaps next year I will be more comfortable asking for the massive Encyclopedia of cooking Ruben linked me to, which is probably more to the purpose, and yet, I find the eclectic restaurant image it assumes one is striving to imitate not only intimidating but somewhat of a dubious element for my own purposes. As Cheryl Mendelson says, home is supposed to be a safe place, tailor made for the people in it, and someone I love would never feel safe in that place .


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## Edward

Since you don't enjoy food, get the cookbook without regard to your requirements. No reason for her to not make good meals for herself and others. And whatever you do, don't move to Louisiana where food is part of the culture. 

You've ruled out 


py3ak said:


> I don't like casseroles. Or vegetables. Or fruit. Or spices. Or herbs. Or intestines....You can add "fat" to the list of things I don't like...I don't like Swiss cheese, I don't like mustard, and I don't like things that are this elaborate.



Looks like grilled or broiled meat, microwave baked potatoes, and vitamin supplements would take care of you. And you don't need a cookbook for that. 

For everyone else 

Paula's Fried Butter Balls Recipe : Paula Deen : Food Network

or the Junior League cookbooks - Junior League Cookbooks


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## py3ak

Edward said:


> Looks like grilled or broiled meat, microwave baked potatoes, and vitamin supplements would take care of you.



Finally, someone who understands! 

Incidentally, Heidi has won a pie-baking competition and her meals have always proved quite acceptable to others, even the ones that I will eat.


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## Mindaboo

I second The Joy of Cooking. I think it would be helpful.


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## a mere housewife

Thanks so much, Mindy  



py3ak said:


> her meals have always proved quite acceptable to others, even the ones that I will eat.



You have such a kind memory. There was that traumatised looking vegetable dish which not even I would eat when we had company in the trailer. And the Chocolate Gob.

Edward, he also eats salad. (no tomatoes, no cucumbers, no avocado, no red onions . . . )

But yes, buy her the cookbook by all means ! ! ! !


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## py3ak

a mere housewife said:


> no red onions



Why the qualifier?

But there is also your Aztec cake that others have consumed in large quantities, and people fighting over who got to take home the scalloped potatoes.


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## Mindaboo

Just so you know, Brad is a lot like that. So, feel free to invite us over for dinner  Or we could invite you.


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## a mere housewife

Well that puts us in some of our favorite company, Mindy .


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## Edward

a mere housewife said:


> Edward, he also eats salad.



But I'm guessing he wouldn't like my home-made vinaigrette - even my family won't touch it, and they usually go for my recipes. 

Back on topic - Something along the lines of an old Better Homes and Gardens (my wife's basic pre-marriage cookbook) or the Good Housekeeping (my old basic book) would be good for a comprehensive book. The Good Housekeeping has a chart of spices and their uses, and a dictionary of terms. While I have some specialty cookbooks, most of the time now I get recipes off the internet and adapt them. 

You'd be better with older cookbooks, a lot of the modern ones are 'healthy' and take the flavor out.


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## a mere housewife

Thank you, Edward; that's helpful. I was wondering about those two in particular, so it's good to have an opinion. I have been gravitating in searching towards the old fashioned ones myself. I think an approach less concerned with image than the modern one tends to be, and more concerned with the kind of knowledge my grandmother had about food, is probably going to give me a better ability to know how to make things even Ruben can enjoy eating with somewhat more flavor and nutrition and variety -- which is certainly the goal .


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## seajayrice

Here's something different, even the little ones can pitch-in. View attachment 2444


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## Edward

I'm thinking that would have texture issues.


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## jwithnell

I would consider the anniversary edition first. It does pick up some of the favorites from the original. We have many more items in grocery stores these days, a taste for ethnic foods, and a better understanding of food safety. (Or perhaps, our current means for obtaining food requires greater awareness of food safety.) All are reasons to go with a newer cookbook.

BTW, in many ways, Joy is an encyclopedia of food. So is The New Professional Chef, a good reference for restaurant basics.


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## Southern Presbyterian

I'm thinking any old cookbook will do.... Just tear a couple pages out for each meal. Wash it down with a cup of water. Problem solved.


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## Laura

> Laura said:
> 
> 
> 
> This may be something Ruben would actually like
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry, afraid not. I don't like Swiss cheese, I don't like mustard, and I don't like things that are this elaborate. I had it once and it wasn't as unacceptable as some other things, though.
Click to expand...


So then sub Manchego for the Swiss, omit the mustard, and what does it matter to you that it's elaborate if Heidi's making it? 

Heidi, the Aztec cake, if it is what I am thinking of, is indeed one of the tastiest things I have ever eaten. Unfortunately, though you gave me the recipe, I don't think I've made it a single time since because one of my husband's very few picky issues is with bechamel-type white sauces.


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## Rich Koster

White Castles with a few juicy mosquitos, mixed into the onions, to satisfy the discerning bat's palate.


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## py3ak

Laura said:


> So then sub Manchego for the Swiss, omit the mustard, and what does it matter to you that it's elaborate if Heidi's making it?



Did I fail to mention that I don't like breading? Or chicken in a situation where I can't see the objectionable parts so as to avoid eating them?


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## a mere housewife

Thanks much, Jean!

Laura, the lady to whom I was a mother's helper passed along that recipe -- it's one of the few dishes that makes me really hungry: though I (obviously  understand about not making such a thing for your husband.

CJ, what a helpful resource. Winnie the Pooh is one of my favorite culinary figures ('a little something' is one of my favorite snacks). In fact, the large puppy, Hormisdas, you see in my avatar has also authored a cookbook -- some time ago, before the invention of the printing press (he claims to be a former pope) he wrote 'The Bishop's Book of Baking Questions -- _Answered_' (the style is a very very early anticipation of medieval scholasticism, with inadequate recipes given first and then reconciled in the correct recipes).


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## Wayne

> I hate most flavors/textures.



So I'm thinking, _The Great American Tofu Cookbook_, or any reasonable facsimile.

(I just made that title up out of thin air, but it turns out : Amazon.com: The great American tofu cookbook (9780394737454): Patricia Gaddis McGruter: Books )

Or you could just subsist on boiled gelatin (let it cool down first).


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## Edward

I don't think the author of this thread would have enjoyed the lunch that my wife and I had. We each started off with a cup of what was supposed to be goulash suppe but had some carrots chopped in with the onions, beef and potatoes (spicy with plenty of paprika, though) we followed that with a couple of lengths of stuffed, seasoned intestines which we dunked in Düsseldorf style mustard. with sides of sauerkraut and a potato salad made with vinegar and herbs.


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## JBaldwin

I'm a bit late to this discussion, but I just purchased a cookbook entitled "Cooking Essentials" for my daughter. It's put out by Cooking Club of America. It is the best book I've seen for explaining the basics of how to cook, use spices, etc. It's simple, short and to the point, and has excellent pictures. I wish I had purchased an extra one for myself.


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## py3ak

Edward said:


> I don't think the author of this thread would have enjoyed the lunch that my wife and I had. We each started off with a cup of what was supposed to be goulash suppe but had some carrots chopped in with the onions, beef and potatoes (spicy with plenty of paprika, though) we followed that with a couple of lengths of stuffed, seasoned intestines which we dunked in Düsseldorf style mustard. with sides of sauerkraut and a potato salad made with vinegar and herbs.



I'm vaguely honored that you would plan a whole meal just to spite me. Thank you for your sacrifice.


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## a mere housewife

JBaldwin said:


> I'm a bit late to this discussion, but I just purchased a cookbook entitled "Cooking Essentials" for my daughter. It's put out by Cooking Club of America. It is the best book I've seen for explaining the basics of how to cook, use spices, etc. It's simple, short and to the point, and has excellent pictures. I wish I had purchased an extra one for myself.



Thanks so much, Joy. I will definitely be on the lookout for that one.


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## Mindaboo

Heidi, One more thought, Food Network has lots of recipes, and you can file them into a recipe box on their site. I found it really easy to use. If I can do it; you can certainly do it.


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## CalvinandHodges

Hi:

If you like to eat out, then this is a great cookbook to get:

Amazon.com: Top Secret Recipes: (Creating kitchen clones of America's favorite brand-name foods): Super Secret Restaurant Collection (9780452287945): Todd Wilbur: Books

Enjoy!

-Rob


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## Edward

py3ak said:


> Thank you for your sacrifice.



Sacrifice was the time some cousins- in-law fed me raw herring in cream sauce. Although it didn't have much flavor - you might actually like it.


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## a mere housewife

Mindy, I think I do actually have an account there! Sometime long ago before several interruptions of our internet accesss . . . (or maybe it was another place at which I had a little recipe box?)

Off topic, perhaps, slightly, I have been hoping all afternoon that the Pooh book has a chapter by Rabbit on 'How to Make a Small Repast So Delicious that Overindulgent Guests Become Embedded in the Entryway . . .' Perhaps failing Rabbit, Laura could come up with something


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## seajayrice

View attachment 2447 For that family on the go. Love the title, sounds so Calvinist!


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## py3ak

Edward said:


> raw herring in cream sauce



Out of those five words, only the preposition is acceptable; and even then, when it comes to food, it is a preposition better avoided.


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## kvanlaan

Ruben, by means of this thread alone, you have taken Batman from the terror that flies at night and the dark knight to being about as terrifying as a box of kittens and about as knightly as a three year old girl with ringlets in a smocked frock (_with_ petticoats, no less). Oh the humanity!

Heidi, go to Amazon and order Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallon. It will teach you both how to eat properly and actually be good for you.


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## py3ak

Perhaps you missed my post #22, Kevin, where it was revealed that I am capable of engaging in misdirection to distract people while scooping bileous food into a ziploc bag. And who is always prepared with countless numbers of evidence bags?


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## kvanlaan

> Perhaps you missed my post #22, Kevin, where it was revealed that I am capable of engaging in misdirection to distract people while scooping bileous food into a ziploc bag.



Ruben, it is time to dip into that great untapped reservoir of gastronomic testosterone. What you describe above is behaviour befitting Robin, not Batman. My dear friend, no man belongs in green tights, nor does it befit any man to travel with baggies for food abduction. I think it is time for an intervention.

Brother, you must come visit. Both you and your bride must come to the farm. Breakfast is bacon and eggs (bacon from our hogs and eggs from our hens) with a side glass of chilled milk from the cow (running somewhere between 5-6% milkfat in the summer, slightly less now). There are few cans of anything involved in meal preparation, as Elizabeth cooks from scratch for most everything. Spaghetti sauce for lunch begins with tomatoes grown in the garden, then hamburger from Sweet Pea (our recently deceased Shorthorn cow with murder in her eyes and heart - farmers always get the last laugh), then fresh vegetables and herbs (some of those home grown as well), then simmering of it all together until it unites in glorious deliciousness. Add pasta and serve.

Dinner will be a portion of Tank, a gentle Dexter steer who has just a couple of weeks ago gone to the Great Pasture in the Sky (we sent him to the butcher a little over two weeks ago, he was then hung for 14 days and cut up just a few days ago and set to freeze). Steak on the grill (we would grill even in a foot of snow) and baked potatoes (served with home made butter, sour cream, and bacon bits) along with sauteed veggies, a little olive oil and a little garlic, salt and parsley. This day's meals can be yours and Heidi's simply for the price of gas and the ability to put up with large amounts of people of all sizes. Yum.

Voila - your first step into culinary normalcy. I'm dead serious - PM me for a date. I've never seen a case so serious as yours. You're welcome to stay a while if you can handle it, but these first steps must be taken immediately if there is to be any hope.


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## py3ak

kvanlaan said:


> Ruben, it is time to dip into that great untapped reservoir of gastronomic testosterone. What you describe above is behaviour befitting Robin, not Batman. My dear friend, no man belongs in green tights, nor does it befit any man to travel with baggies for food abduction. I think it is time for an intervention.
> 
> Brother, you must come visit. Both you and your bride must come to the farm. Breakfast is bacon and eggs (bacon from our hogs and eggs from our hens) with a side glass of chilled milk from the cow (running somewhere between 5-6% milkfat in the summer, slightly less now). There are few cans of anything involved in meal preparation, as Elizabeth cooks from scratch for most everything. Spaghetti sauce for lunch begins with tomatoes grown in the garden, then hamburger from Sweet Pea (our recently deceased Shorthorn cow with murder in her eyes and heart - farmers always get the last laugh), then fresh vegetables and herbs (some of those home grown as well), then simmering of it all together until it unites in glorious deliciousness. Add pasta and serve.
> 
> Dinner will be a portion of Tank, a gentle Dexter steer who has just a couple of weeks ago gone to the Great Pasture in the Sky (we sent him to the butcher a little over two weeks ago, he was then hung for 14 days and cut up just a few days ago and set to freeze). Steak on the grill (we would grill even in a foot of snow) and baked potatoes (served with home made butter, sour cream, and bacon bits) along with sauteed veggies, a little olive oil and a little garlic, salt and parsley. This day's meals can be yours and Heidi's simply for the price of gas and the ability to put up with large amounts of people of all sizes. Yum.
> 
> Voila - your first step into culinary normalcy. I'm dead serious - PM me for a date. I've never seen a case so serious as yours. You're welcome to stay a while if you can handle it, but these first steps must be taken immediately if there is to be any hope.



It was resourceful and decisive, Kevin: prime traits of any non-super-powered-super-hero. Thank you very much for your gracious invitation. Jesting aside, it would be a pleasure to meet you and the family.

I don't eat eggs: I thought about what they were one day. Bacon is acceptable. I don't drink milk, unless chocolate has been added to it. Hamburger and noodles are both fine, but if tomato sauce has chunks in it one feels constrained to offer to buy a more up-to-date blender. 

Vegetables and herbs should be kept separate from the food proper. I unobtrusively pass on the sour cream, sauteed veggies, etc.

Take another look at my avatar; I thought it was clear that _normalcy_ was not really very high on the list of priorities. Thank you for the compliment on the depth of my convictions and sincerity of my principles, though.


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## kvanlaan

Ruben, I fear your condition is terminal. My regards to Heidi, but it appears you are beyond the scope of even the most dedicated gastronome. The fact that you are apparently at peace with your eating habits is quite besides the point, and may be comparable to the hard-bitten addict who is comfortable to the degree with which he fancies heroin. Is Heidi similarly afflicted, or does she possess some grasp of societal norms in how she eats?


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## py3ak

Heidi's health necessitates some delicacy in her consumption, but no, she does not share my astringent and rational tastes. Years ago my grandmother, upon finding out that I don't eat fish, told Heidi she would pray for us; I still don't eat fish.


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## Wayne

Kevin, that menu reminds me of the Amish diet:



> Eat absolutely ANYTHING you want in any amount. Then work like a dog from 5:30 AM till 7 or 8 PM.


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