# How to make the best use of the time?



## Jonathan95 (Jan 5, 2018)

Thanks for reading this. I'm a newly single man after a few months of being in a committed relationship. It ended on Christmas and now I'm just home mostly. Boredom and depression are frequently at my doorstep. I spend a good amount of time reading and working but I'm truly not doing well. I'm sad and I don't know how to spend my time wisely anymore. I was focused mostly on getting ready for marriage and now I'm just sitting here twiddling my thumbs. Overall, I just need your prayers. Please. I don't wanna do anything stupid because I feel frustrated. I want to remain busy doing good things. Just not sure exactly what that is yet.

Blessings.


----------



## Ask Mr. Religion (Jan 5, 2018)

Will pray for you, Jonathan.


----------



## JimmyH (Jan 5, 2018)

Physical exercise is a palliative against depression, requires time, and is beneficial for the whole body and especially the mind. At 69 years old I do a fair amount of it and have for many years. Exercise is 'the fountain of youth' in my experience. Walking or jogging, callisthenics, and/or weight training will pay enormous dividends for you.

Reactions: Like 4 | Amen 1


----------



## posttenebraslux83 (Jan 5, 2018)

JimmyH said:


> Physical exercise is a palliative against depression, requires time, and is beneficial for the whole body and especially the mind. At 69 years old I do a fair amount of it and have for many years. Exercise is 'the fountain of youth' in my experience. Walking or jogging, callisthenics, and/or weight training will pay enormous dividends for you.


Agreed! 

By the way, there is a terrific little book which may be of some help to you in this season of life, it is by Dr. David P. Murray (_of Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary_) which is titled "_Christians Get Depressed Too_". I've read through it many a time and it is a very helpful, edifying and encouraging read. Also, if you have the time, Dr. Martin Lloyd Jones' book "_Spiritual Depression_" is hands down the best work on the topic. 

My mother went home to be with the Lord last year and these two works were very helpful for me.

Reactions: Like 1 | Sad 1


----------



## Jack K (Jan 5, 2018)

You're in Boston, huh? You could devote yourself to shoveling out your neighborhood. 

Seriously, I agree with the wisdom that physical activity is helpful. The situation you describe is sad and frustrating, as I know from personal experience, and it is no surprise that you feel down. Having active work to dive into really helps. I've also heard excellent things about both of the books that have been recommended, though I've not read them myself.

And in matters of love and courtship, be patient. Bumps in the road are commonplace. For a man with a godly approach to life, these things often have a way of working themselves out in due time.

I took a moment to pray for you.

Reactions: Amen 1


----------



## Jonathan95 (Jan 5, 2018)

posttenebraslux83 said:


> Agreed!
> 
> By the way, there is a terrific little book which may be of some help to you in this season of life, it is by Dr. David P. Murray (_of Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary_) which is titled "_Christians Get Depressed Too_". I've read through it many a time and it is a very helpful, edifying and encouraging read. Also, if you have the time, Dr. Martin Lloyd Jones' book "_Spiritual Depression_" is hands down the best work on the topic.
> 
> My mother went home to be with the Lord last year and these two works were very helpful for me.



Praise God for your mother. Thank you so much. I'll definitely check out those reads!



Jack K said:


> You're in Boston, huh? You could devote yourself to shoveling out your neighborhood.
> 
> Seriously, I agree with the wisdom that physical activity is helpful. The situation you describe is sad and frustrating, as I know from personal experience, and it is no surprise that you feel down. Having active work to dive into really helps. I've also heard excellent things about both of the books that have been recommended, though I've not read them myself.
> 
> ...



I can't thank you enough. I'll deal with the snow for sure hahaha, Blessings

Reactions: Like 1


----------



## JimmyH (Jan 5, 2018)

D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones sermons contained in the book 'Spiritual Depression', can be listened to, or downloaded, for free here https://www.mljtrust.org/collections/spiritual-depression/

Reactions: Like 1 | Rejoicing 1


----------



## Cedarbay (Jan 5, 2018)

Since it's only been a few days, what you are feeling seems normal. Time to grieve is hard yet important. Do you have a male confidant, pastor, etc., to walk through this with? You are in our prayers.


----------



## Jonathan95 (Jan 5, 2018)

Cedarbay said:


> Since it's only been a few days, what you are feeling seems normal. Time to grieve is hard yet important. Do you have a male confidant, pastor, etc., to walk through this with? You are in our prayers.



I need to get out of the habit of being a loner and dealing with things on my own. A few of the guys in my church know, including my pastor but we don't spend too much time together. That's my fault.


----------



## ZackF (Jan 6, 2018)

Jonathan95 said:


> I need to get out of the habit of being a loner and dealing with things on my own. A few of the guys in my church know, including my pastor but we don't spend too much time together. That's my fault.



Getting past a girl is always terrible. It can take a long while. I always hated it. You don't always have to talk about it to someone as there is only so much to say. Just be around others more. Get some regular exercise. Don't look for a quick rebound girl.

Reactions: Amen 1 | Sad 1


----------



## Jonathan95 (Jan 6, 2018)

ZackF said:


> Just be around others more. Get some regular exercise. Don't look for a quick rebound girl.



Amen!!


----------



## deleteduser99 (Jan 6, 2018)

I feel for you brother. Such a thing feels devastating. May God strengthen and cheer you.

Sometimes the way to keep from depression is to keep busy. If you are looking for a good work, might you consider doing it in the line of work you’re engaged in? Might be there a new skill to obtain, or some education or study you can pick up that will increase your value as a worker? After all, you have a command to subdue the earth, and that would aid you in your task.

Though, my prayer too is that God will provide you a wife to subdue it with.


----------



## Ryan&Amber2013 (Jan 6, 2018)

Sorry to hear about your situation, brother.

Pursue the beautiful things in life, focus on growing into more greatness of character, serve people to your greatest capacity, spend much quality time with God, and take advantage of this season in your life. There is so much for you to live for, with a whole world of possibilities in front of you.

From J.R. Miller:
We are ever being called to a new life—a holier life, greater activity, and better service. "You have compassed this mountain long enough—turn northward!" Break away from the routine. Do not keep on doing just what you have been doing heretofore. Do not be content to go over the same old rounds. Turn northward—start in new lines, with your face toward God. Do larger things than you have done heretofore. Pray more fervently. Love better, more sweetly, more helpfully. Let Christ have all your life. Do not merely go round the mountain's base—climb up its side! Every time you compass it, gain a little higher range, get nearer heaven, nearer God.

We never should forget with what sympathy heaven looks down upon us continually. God is not a hard master. He knows how frail we are. He remembers that we are dust. Therefore he is patient with us. He judges us graciously. If we try to do our best, though we seem to fail, marring our work, he understands and praises what we have done. With such a master we should never lose heart, never grow discouraged, never become depressed, never let gloom or bitterness into our heart—but should always keep brave, hopeful, sweet—forgetting the past and stretching forward!

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but _I press on _to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: _Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on _toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:12-14

Check this out, brother.
https://www.gracegems.org/Miller/go_forward.htm


----------



## Polanus1561 (Jan 8, 2018)

I would recommend 2 books (outside of Holy Scriptures) - Thoughts for Young Men - JC Ryle and A Godly Man's Picture - Thomas Watson. Cannot think of any better 2 books to frame a young man's way.


----------



## C. Matthew McMahon (Jan 8, 2018)

This may be of help: _The Christian’s Resolve to Redeem Time_, Eph. 5:15-16


----------



## Ben Zartman (Jan 9, 2018)

posttenebraslux83 said:


> Agreed!
> 
> By the way, there is a terrific little book which may be of some help to you in this season of life, it is by Dr. David P. Murray (_of Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary_) which is titled "_Christians Get Depressed Too_". I've read through it many a time and it is a very helpful, edifying and encouraging read. Also, if you have the time, Dr. Martin Lloyd Jones' book "_Spiritual Depression_" is hands down the best work on the topic.
> 
> My mother went home to be with the Lord last year and these two works were very helpful for me.


Dr. Murray is coming to our church in North Providence (just around the corner from the OP) for a conference in May. Come on down and meet your neighboring saints!
Details on the Grace Community Baptist Church website. Hopefully posted by now...


----------



## Gesetveemet (Jan 9, 2018)

Jonathan95 said:


> Thanks for reading this. I'm a newly single man after a few months of being in a committed relationship. It ended on Christmas and now I'm just home mostly. Boredom and depression are frequently at my doorstep. I spend a good amount of time reading and working but I'm truly not doing well. I'm sad and I don't know how to spend my time wisely anymore. I was focused mostly on getting ready for marriage and now I'm just sitting here twiddling my thumbs. Overall, I just need your prayers. Please. I don't wanna do anything stupid because I feel frustrated. I want to remain busy doing good things. Just not sure exactly what that is yet.
> 
> Blessings.


I know this statement is used often but pray much. Pray that the Lord would fill that empty place in your heart with Himself. Also stay busy.


----------



## AnnaBanana (Jan 11, 2018)

Not to sound like an expert in this area but, I went through a pretty sad breakup that I thought would ruin my life (at the time I honestly didn't know how to live a life without him) 

But I am here to say... I am alive, and I well! Praise be to our Lord and King!The first few days, I cried.. and cried, and dragged my feet across the floor. But, then, I realized that there is so much else to focus on and so much more to live for and do then let this ruin me. My relationship with the Lord grew.. and when I say grew, it blossomed, it taught me to trust, rely, and turn to the Lord is every single area in my life, even the uncomfortable ones. 

I walked a lot, pretty much everywhere. Just being outside, getting some fresh air, can do your body, soul and mind so good. 

Praying for you!


----------



## Ajay (Jan 12, 2018)

"Redeeming the time." Colossians 4:5 

"That you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way." Colossians 1:10 

Thief 1. One of the greatest time-wasting sins, consists of idleness or sloth.

Thief 2. The next thief or time-waster, is excess of sleep.

Thief 3. Another time-waster, is an inordinate adorning of the body.

Thief 4. Another time-wasting thief, is unnecessary pomp andextravagance in household furniture and domestic entertainments.

Thief 5. Another time-wasting sin, is needless feastings, gluttony, and drinking.

Thief 6. Another time-waster, is idle talk.

Thief 7. Another thief which would steal your time, is vain and sinful company.

Thief 8. Another notorious time-wasting thief, is needless, inordinate sports and games — which are masked with the deceitful title of recreations.

Thief 9. Another time-wasting thief, is excess of worldly cares and business.

Thief 10. Another time-waster, is vain, ungoverned and sinful thoughts.

Thief 11. Another dangerous time-wasting sin, is the reading ofworthless books, plays, romances, and novels. And also unprofitable studies, undertaken but for pride and vain-glory, or the pleasing of a carnal or curious mind.

Thief 12. But the master-thief that robs men of their time, is an unsanctified, ungodly heart; for this loses time, whatever men are doing — because they never intend to do anything for the glory of God.

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do — do it all for the glory of God!" 1 Corinthians 10:31

(Richard Baxter) 

Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk


----------

