1689 Baptist Church Worship Led by Teens

[feeny]

I’m not sure how to think about this issue in my church. My husband and I are recent members.
Worship/music is led by the teenage daughters of one of the pastors, who are overseen by their mother. They are very talented and the song choices are solid. However, I’m a little concerned that they are the ones leading worship every Sunday.

Is this a normal setup? Am I being silly?
Occasionally some adults will join and we love it when they do. We have several very musically talented adult members in the church, one of them is a pastor (not the father to the teens).

One other thing is that every holiday (Easter, Christmas) the student ministry puts on basically a concert followed by preaching. They also have a concert midweek for the big holidays as well.
Are we wrong to think that kids shouldn’t be the main focus of the church? Most resources and spotlight is on students.

All children are important and special and should be included in the church. We should be nurturing them, supporting them, teaching them. But it feels like they are in a leadership role over the adults.

Any advice?

 

[Deleted member 13126]

I would say that your concerns are not unfounded. It could be regarded as disorderly or worldly.

But what does your husband think?

If your husband agrees then I suppose your next step as a couple ought to be to prayerfully puzzle out how far you’re willing to ride this train, because it could very well take you to another station (read: church) as it did for us when our family went through a similar process earlier this year. We committed those matters to prayer for more than a year, waiting to see what the Lord would do, in addition to trying to affect change ourselves.

I believe you may have mentioned in another thread that you don’t know of a better church within an hour’s drive. I don’t believe people ought to make mountains out of mole hills as it pertains to commuting to and from church. But I also have four young children, and so I understand the challenges of traveling longer distances with a family quite well.

Some hills are worthy dying on. Is this one of those hills? Only you and your husband can decide these things before the Lord for yourselves.

But if you decide it’s worth speaking up about, I’d suggest that it may be good for your husband speak to the Pastor, either privately, or with you accompanying him. Pray before, during and after. Have your Bibles open. There are a few texts you can go to, but the stumbling block verses come to mind. Worship ought not be led by children or women. Along these lines the texts regarding the role of women in the church or the texts related to the regulative principle of worship might be helpful.

 

[SolaScriptura]

I mean, baptists gonna baptist.

We've had our youth play the instruments for our congregational singing on a couple occasions. There's a way to do it that is simply involving them in mature roles, and there's a way to do it like you're letting the teens turn it into an immature caricature of a worship service. Y'all would have to decide how it is coming across to you.

 

[jwithnell]

May I ask why you joined this church? It sounds like their approach had already been put in place?

 

[Phil D.]

I mean, baptists gonna baptist.

That's kind of like observing that Finney was the father of determinism and all the nonsense that entailed, and then saying "presbyterians gonna presbyter."

 

[feeny]

I would say that your concerns are not unfounded. It could be regarded as disorderly or worldly.

But what does your husband think?

If your husband agrees then I suppose your next step as a couple ought to be to prayerfully puzzle out how far you’re willing to ride this train, because it could very well take you to another station (read: church) as it did for us when our family went through a similar process earlier this year. We committed those matters to prayer for more than a year, waiting to see what the Lord would do, in addition to trying to affect change ourselves.

I believe you may have mentioned in another thread that you don’t know of a better church within an hour’s drive. I don’t believe people ought to make mountains out of mole hills as it pertains to commuting to and from church. But I also have four young children, and so I understand the challenges of traveling longer distances with a family quite well.

Some hills are worthy dying on. Is this one of those hills? Only you and your husband can decide these things before the Lord for yourselves.

But if you decide it’s worth speaking up about, I’d suggest that it may be good for your husband speak to the Pastor, either privately, or with you accompanying him. Pray before, during and after. Have your Bibles open. There are a few texts you can go to, but the stumbling block verses come to mind. Worship ought not be led by children or women. Along these lines the texts regarding the role of women in the church or the texts related to the regulative principle of worship might be helpful.

Thanks for your reply. My husband agrees. We are both new to church membership. We will consider what you’ve said.

 

[feeny]

May I ask why you joined this church? It sounds like their approach had already been put in place?

We hadn’t attended anywhere regularly as a couple until the last few years. During the whole Covid thing we began really reading the Bible and learning a lot, building our relationships with God.
Then we went to several different churches in the area for about 1-2 months each. None seemed right or what we needed in a church. We found the one we are members of now. We agree on a great deal with this church, and we knew that we needed to be plugged in somewhere.
In hindsight, we both wish that we had waited and continued to attend, but not become members just yet. We’re still new to reformed faith. I was raised in Pentecostal churches/belief. My husband’s family didn’t regularly attend anywhere.
Sometimes you have to go through and experience things before you see it’s a problem, unfortunately.

 

[Deleted member 13126]

Sometimes you have to go through and experience things before you see it’s a problem, unfortunately.

I agree, and I wouldn't beat yourself up about this unnecessarily. For us, evangelism, clear and consistent Gospel presentations, corporate Christian service, the doctrine of the working church, etc., as well as hospitality and the pure and undefiled religion that James talks about in James 1:27 weren't really on our radar at the time. We were over the moon to be aligned doctrinally with a church and to be able to sit under robust and sound preaching. We, too, found and joined our church during COVID. We made some assumptions about church programs and what would or wouldn't come back once things settled down and all that panic around the pandemic cleared. Turns out we were wrong about some of those assumptions and, as I said, in other cases, it just wasn't a real area of focus for us in our walk with the Lord. But we ought to walk in the light of the light we've been given, where ever we're at in our walks with the Lord. Totally understand.

 

[Jonathco]

Hi Ashley, a couple things stand out to me from your post.

1. Are these young teens "leading" or simply facilitating the music? Here's why I ask:
   
   I am an elder at my church and in addition to shepherding and teaching duties, one of my specific areas of oversight is music. I vet new songs we consider singing, to ensure they are doctrinally rich, congregationally singable, and not from a questionable source or artist. I also select the songs we sing each week, with input from the rest of the elder body, to ensure what we sing ties closely to what is being preached that Sunday. I do this, even on weeks where I take a week off of playing/singing, and another member facilitates, so I can sit with my wife and children.
   
   To put it plainly - what the church sings is part of the teaching ministry. Ideally, this should be overseen by an elder, even if that elder does not play or lead the singing each week.
   
   
2. Regarding the concerts surrounding "holidays" - your husband and you will likely need to work through whether or not this is a hill to die on. At face value, a concert at the Sunday gathering would be a difficult one for me to not have significant issues with. Have you and your husband considering speaking with the pastors/elders of the church regarding your concerns?

Sister, it was only last year that our reforming church became convicted that music should be oversaw by an elder. I would strongly ensourage you to speak with the pastors of the church. It may be ignorance or it may be convictional difference, but you guys will not know for sure until you've brought the issue before them for consideration.

 

[Jack K]

Sure, there may be some error or lack of wisdom in your church's practice. Perhaps those young people are given inappropriate oversight of the worship content, or they are made too much of just for being up front. Or maybe your church has failed to fully appreciate how the leaders of the worship service are meant in some sense to speak for God, so that your church has not given due attention to who should fill those leader-looking roles during worship.

But there are even greater errors you will likely find in many of the other nearby churches that preach the gospel (which is most essential). Some churches will assume kids don't belong in the "big church" service at all, or they will ignore their young people, or they will go all out to attract them through flashy entertainment rather than involve them in the means of grace and gospel worship. Any of those would be a worse place to be.

And to be at no church at all would be still worse. So, it may indeed be you should broaden your church search a bit before you get even more immersed where you are, but be careful. You don't want to end up searching endlessly for the perfect church, or be so critical of all churches that you end up dissatisfied with any of them. Your starting place with worship should be an attitude of thankfulness for what God has provided, not discontent over what he has thus far withheld.

Talk humbly with the leadership of your church. Seek to truly learn. Ask why they do things the way they do. Try first to appreciate what's good, not scold for what's wrong. See where that takes you and them. Don't be too quick to decide you made a big mistake where you are.

 

[jwithnell]

We hadn’t attended anywhere regularly as a couple until the last few years. During the whole Covid thing we began really reading the Bible and learning a lot, building our relationships with God.
Then we went to several different churches in the area for about 1-2 months each. None seemed right or what we needed in a church. We found the one we are members of now. We agree on a great deal with this church, and we knew that we needed to be plugged in somewhere.
In hindsight, we both wish that we had waited and continued to attend, but not become members just yet. We’re still new to reformed faith. I was raised in Pentecostal churches/belief. My husband’s family didn’t regularly attend anywhere.
Sometimes you have to go through and experience things before you see it’s a problem, unfortunately.

Sounds like your heart is in the right place trying to establish yourself with a church and your faith will be strengthened by doing so. Finding a good church is not always an easy task, but we can bless and be blessed wherever we find ourselves..

 

[Santos]

That's kind of like observing that Finney was the father of determinism and all the nonsense that entailed, and then saying "presbyterians gonna presbyter."

ooooohhh Burn

 

[davejonescue]

Our town is a Christian College town (Howard Payne) so our student ministries are kind of at the forefront. But my perspective is a little different than yours. Imagine being a member with a call to life-long celibacy; and not only having to sit and support all the student ministries, but the marriage and children's ministries as well. I will go through my church life, probably never hearing a single sermon or shout out on or about Pauline Singleness; yet, church isnt just about me. How I could dread going to service on Fathers Day, Mothers Day, baby dedication day; even our "mature singles" Bible study group is comprised of mostly married couples and parents. Yet, as long as my church stays doctrinally sound; it is my home. I must decrease, and he must increase; and however God has chosen to glorify the body I am a part of; whether that is an emphasis on the future generations via students, the present generation via married couples and parents; or even the seniors which get more play than the singles; it is Gods will. It is for his glory we gather. I would focus more on orthodoxy; is the church teaching sound doctrine; because that is becoming harder and harder to find. If the students get more shine, so be it; look at the war they are entering....Barna says only 25% will make it out of college without deconverting. I dont know your situation fully, so please this isnt meant to be offensive. But if the preaching is soundly, the music isn't heretical, and you all love each other; who actually sings hallelujah on stage should be of little concern.

Another thing to think about too; especially in smaller congregations, is sometimes situations like that occur because no one else is willing to step up to the plate. Have you or your husband considered possibly joining the worship team?