Consumed With Ones Own Sinfulness

[Quatchu]

I have often sympathized with Luther who was known to greatly struggle with hate of his sinfulness. I just find that when i sin especially when its one that i constantly find myself in my feelings in hate for my sin and despair are very strong. Despair because i feel that as someone who calls himself a Christian I so often find my self committing the same sins over again even after repenting and making effort to stop. I know this is our sinful nature but it never ceases to hit me hard as i know I displease God, and i truly wish to please him. My mind tries to tell me that i do not belong to Christ if i so easily fall into the same sins.

I find myself so consumed with hate for my sin that it can to often turn into a self hate. Is there fine line between hating sin and self hate. I just struggle so much with feelings of unworthiness and doubting that I'm regenerate, of wanting to please God and feeling like as a Christian i should be more able to not fall into the same sins.

 

[rbcbob]

Justin; a couple of questions for you.

1. Why do you suppose that you continue to "bother" confessing and repenting?

2. Have you ceased to hope exclusively in the blood of Christ as the one sufficient propitiation for your sins?

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

 

[PuritanZealot]

often find my self committing the same sins over again even after repenting and making effort to stop

Therein lies your problem brother, I too have a deep struggle with sin, as should every believer, as soon as you stop committing one sin, you struggle with the thoughts of committing that sin, and then the desire to even think of committing that sin. God exposes the exceeding sinfulness of sin to the believer and reduces the cathedral of works we automatically build up to a pile of stinking rubble.

Explore that standing sink that is your heart, analyse yourself, pray about your unworthiness, sinfulness and ugliness before a wrathful God at Sinai, and then plead and pray that Christ will draw you to Himself at Calvary. Our only hiding place from 'making an effort to stop' is in Christ and then the Holy Spirit will not be grieved and will assist you utterly in being able to stop.

 

[Quatchu]

1. Why do you suppose that you continue to "bother" confessing and repenting?

I continue to bother because i have sinned, the Bible says to confess our sins to God and repent. I feel guilt for dispeasing the God whom i love and who shows such grace to me a sinner who does not deserve it.

2. Have you ceased to hope exclusively in the blood of Christ as the one sufficient propitiation for your sins?

No, when i have moments like this its the only thing that keeps me from full despair. I know that the only person who can save me from my sins is Christ, by his death and resurrection, I love him for that sacrifice. My problem is not that I wan't to cease sinning so i will be saved, but that i want to not sin because I'am saved and I wish to please God. I know i will never not be able to sin, its what my sin nature wants, however Satan tries to tell me that if i truly belong to Christ then should i not have more strength to withstand more temptation then i have been.

 

[ServantsHeart]

Dear Brother in Christ, And that is what you are my Brother and fellow redeemed sinner based on what I hear your Heart saying. For 30 years certain sins have troubled me and caused me to think at times as you are now. I have learned ,the Holy Spirit Helping me that we don't Believe once in the Past then walk in rationalism sprinkled with a little faith here and then there. Nor do we Repent at the beginning then after that just try to bare up under a load of present and future guilt. We are always Believing or trusting in His total forgiveness every moment of the day. And we are always Repenting likewise looking by Faith to the Finished Work of Christ in confession of our ongoing sin and failures. All your sins have been forever dealt with,you deal with accepting His forgiveness for them until this life is over. When what ever lessons the Father is teaching you in your present struggles is acomplished He will show you His Victory in grace and truth then move you on to the next area that needs Renewal in your mind and Heart. One day If you are truely His which I think you are you will look back in utter Wonder at what He has worked in your soul when all your efforts have failed. We Must overcome ,persevere,finish our course,fight the good fight and keep the Faith. By His Grace from beginning to End you will. Now work out your Salvation with Fear and Trembling trusting in your heavenly Fathers love which never Fails.

 

[greenbaggins]

I think this is a struggle common to many Christians. And that in itself may be encouraging to you, Justin. Another thing of help is to recognize that only the Christian does battle with sin. The unbeliever never does. The mere presence of the battle in your life is a sign that there is in fact a new nature present alongside the admittedly hard to kill (read here "impossible," actually, when one is considering only yourself) old nature. One of the reasons that God allows us to fall into the same sin over and over again is to show us how impossible it is for us to conquer it. Only Christ can conquer it in us.

Here are some things to keep in mind. First of all, do not try to emotionally manipulate yourself into sorrow for sin. The problem here is that we tend to equate sorrow for sin with repentance. They are not the same thing. We think that if only we can have that joy in the Lord, then we will be able to fight off sin. It doesn't work that way. Emotions are not the measure of repentance.

On the flip side, if you can remember one single time when you knew for certain that you were a child of the King, then rest assured that God's verdict has not changed. Try to bring back to mind that time of certainty.

Furthermore, even if you feel like you just can't make use of the means of grace because you are unworthy, do it anyway. The fact is that we are always unworthy in and of ourselves to make use of the means of grace. We fool ourselves into thinking that if we just make ourselves a little bit better, then we will be more worthy of grace. Being worthy of grace is a contradiction in terms. We are never worthy. That's the whole point of grace. When you make use of the means of grace, make sure that you are not thinking of it as a pill to take that will automatically cure you. The means of grace contribute to your overall spiritual health by the power of the Holy Spirit. The long battles are never won in a day.

On the long battles, don't think of them as long battles. Satan wants you to look at the big picture here and see just how big your sin is (so that he can diminish Christ in your eyes). He wants to overwhelm you by how powerful sin is. Don't think of conquering sin as a once for all perfectionistic thing. It is a daily battle. Only think of the battle for that day. Sometimes it is even necessary to break the day down into smaller chunks.

Lastly, recognize when you are going to be more tempted. Spiritual highs are danger points. Spiritual lows are danger points. Whenever something fantastic happens or whenever something awful happens, then be on your guard. We tend to be more vulnerable then.

 

[Quatchu]

This is all very helpful. It helps incredible knowing that these feelings are not unique just to me.

 

[Leslie]

I was in a similar position, not long ago, figuring there was no way that I was reprobate for sure, no evidence of regeneration. A wise pastor asked me, "Do reprobates hate their sin the way that you do?" This was helpful, pointing out that the very fact of the struggle indicates a change of heart toward God.

 

[ServantsHeart]

Being worthy of grace is a contradiction in terms. We are never worthy. That's the whole point of grace. When you make use of the means of grace, make sure that you are not thinking of it as a pill to take that will automatically cure you. The means of grace contribute to your overall spiritual health by the power of the Holy Spirit. The long battles are never won in a day.

Amen Brother,a good thrust into our modern day shallow attitude about a quick out and that little ugly works rightousness spirit from the serpent and his hissing lies!

 

[Peairtach]

Have you studied Romans chapters 6 and 7 closely?

If we are Christ's, and we have reason to believe we are Christ's if we have the marks of grace, e.g. hatred for sin, love for God, Christ and His law, a strong motivation to be holy and free of sin if we could be (we can't of course be completely free of the presence of sin in this life), love for the brethren, love for Christ's cause and kingdom and happiness when we see people grow in grace or get converted, love for God's Word, for gathering with God's people, for God's day, etc, etc.

But even although we are saved and look to Christ's blood and righteousness to make us right with God, we can still be under a relative legal bondage, because we have not appreciated that we are no longer under law as a Covenant of Works but under grace.

If you have faith in Christ and are therefore justified nothing bad that you do can change that, and nothing good that you do can add to that. Of course if you are justified your heart will also be changed and you will be united to Christ - particularly in his death and resurrection - and so you will want to live as a Christian.

It is vitally important to taste that freedom and breath it in. You are no longer under law as a CoW but under grace. The law is a pattern and rule of life for the believer not a means to get right with God or stay right with God.

When a believer sins they should no longer think of themselves as being arraigned before God as Judge to face eternal punishment, but brought before God as Father to face loss of fellowship and chastisement.

I know what you're going through because I very much did not appreciate that I was no longer under law but under grace for years after I was converted. I had a terrible lack of assurance of faith.

Listen to sermons by Sinclair Ferguson and John Piper on this area of Romans, so that you understand not only that

(a) You are justified by faith in Christ alone through grace alone,

but also,

(b) You are no longer under the law as a CoW but only as a rule and pattern of life. When a believer sins they are not before God as Judge but as Heavenly Father, not for the threat of eternal punishment, but for possible loss of fellowship and/or temporal troubles.

If you want a heavier/deeper study on this vital subject read the Marrow of Modern Divinity by Edward Fisher.

 

[Wannabee]

God provides grace for the moment, always; and always enough.

I can't add much to what Lane wrote. It was an excellent response and I'd encourage you to read through it repeatedly.

There are a couple of thoughts I'd put forward in case they help in your self-examination. They might or might not be relevant. First, there can be a certain pride in beating ourselves up over sin. This is insidious and often very difficult to discern. But the implications are that one begins to set his sin above Christ's atonement. They wouldn't come out and say this, but the testimony of their hearts bear it out as they continue focusing on the sin to the exclusion of the forgiveness that Christ has secured. Is any sin, any amount of sin, no matter how grievous and vile, more powerful than the work of the Savior? Feast on Christ and know the peace that surpasses understanding.

Second, being broken over sin is good. Staying there is not. There is a very real sense in which we should be excited when we recognize our sin, for it gives us an opportunity to repent and grow in Christ-likeness. Praise God for eyes to see and ears to hear so that you can take the steps to hack Agag to pieces. But many never take this step. The sheep bleat in their ears and they nurture Agag along without ever truly dealing with the sin that lurks there. This is remorse, as was discussed earlier, without true repentance. To repent is to turn away from the sin and toward Christ. It is to turn the heart to Christ and grasp His strength in overcoming it. He has provided Scripture as our guide in order that every man may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work. He has sent the Holy Spirit to make our path straight. If this is part of your struggle then truly repent and rejoice in life everlasting.


Blessings,