Dealing with 'new age' mother....

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gordo

Puritan Board Freshman
Hello all.

Just looking for some advice on how to approach my current situation with my mother. My mom has for many, many years been into the new age cults etc. From Deepak Chopra to Oprah's musings to back in the day Shirley Maclain reincarnation stuff. She has a big buddha statue in her back yard.

I never really spoke much to here about my faith over the years. Probably because i wasn't being a very good witness and really was confused most of the time anyways. However, after being introduced to the truths of the sovereignty of God and the doctrines of Grace I have slowly over the last year made changes in my life and my mom has noticed. She now like to chat about God with me and is curious, but if anything she is a universalist now (many ways to God).

This past week though she said she could feel satan's presence in her dreams and she was visibly shaken. She also mentioned that Jesus is in her dreams and tries to help her. Seeing an opportunity to show her perhaps some truths of the Bible I directed her to read Precious Remedies Against Satan's Devices by Thomas Brooks. That night she read some of it and pulled out her Bible for the first time in years. The next day when I saw her she told me God gave her a message for me and that I so to speak 'listen to my mind to much instead of my heart'. I am taking this to mean I follow the Bible too much instead of listening to my heart. sigh.

I was in a rush so I didn't get to mention to her about the depravity of man's heart and how it can't always be trusted. Anyways, I think it's time to start sharing with her some gospel truths about the depravity of man and man's fallen nature. Any help with some good scriptures or things of that nature would be great. Also, please pray for myself and my mother as we deal with this.

I think the bottom line is she is always looking for spiritual calling. Something that she needs to do. I don't know how to tell her that it's not about her, but about God and sometimes we just need to be still and let God guide us.

Thank you all for reading! :)
 
I would in the most loving and respectfull way state to her that it is scripture that is our primary guide to life. In her new-agism she is of course experience driven, God talking directly to us. Try to in love drive home to her that we are not in position of experiencing God as we see fit but to experience God as he sees fit. God sets the rules of how we are to aproech him, we can't just go out and find God in many different ways but only in his ways.
 
Romans 1:16-23 is a good passage for new age thinkers and budhists. Also Gal 1:6-9.

The Genesis account of the fall of man and subsequent depravity is probably critical for her. If you could do an extended bible study with her on the topic it would be great. It sounds like you're on the right track with prayer and witnessing. I will pray for her now.
 
Encourage her to read the gospel of John. Don't worry about getting into discussion/debates. Just simply observe that the kind of questions and insights she thinks she has were regularly the kind Jesus was busy addressing. Encourage her to read John's gospel and answer a few simple questions: who does Jesus think he is, what does Jesus think our (mankind's) problem is, and what does Jesus say is the solution to the problem? I'd even applaud the seriousness of her spiritual hunger, demonstrated by her various spiritual interests. Use that as a lever to encourage herthat Jesus continues to eagerly speak to those who in sincerity want to know the truth and be set from from the lies of this world.

The back off and pray that the Spirit will work. Your mom is so deep into the deception of Satan that it is only the ordinary means of grace that will be used.

My own mom spent about 15 years berating and bullying me about my growing faith. In part she felt guilty around me, even when I wasn't being clumsy and witnessing horribly to her. Then in the mid 90's I adopted the approach I'm encouraging here. I stopped communicating in a manner that implied we were on different sides. Instead I started agreeing with her underlying desires, and keeping to myself my concerns about the sinful ways in which she was trying to meet those desires.

In 1998 she began bugging me for advice on where to go to church. Now she was still an unbeliever at this point, thinking of herself as a spiritual person and therefore a Christian. I spent a year rather reluctantly (fearing my own tendencies to turn things into an argument), recommending her to one evangelical church after another. Each one lasted six or so weeks before I got another call requesting another recommendation. I can't tell you both how scared and how frustrated I was that year, scared that I'd say something stupid and frustrated that she kept asking me for "social" advice when all I wanted was for her simply hear and believe the gospel.

Near the middle of 1999 I was at the end of my recommendations. Just finishing up at a reformed seminary, I sent her to the last (potentially) evangelical church I knew of in her area, a PCA church. Six weeks came and went without a phone call. Three months into this period, in another conversation, I heard her say "in our church we sing ...". I distinctly remember trying to hide my shock ather use of the first-person plural pronoun to describe this church.

Three more months after this she called me up and asked me for some help on a question I was desperately afraid was going to result in a argument. Turned out she was going to go for a membership interview with the church, and since I was a seminary graduate, she figure I would fulfill my filial duties and help her prepare. After I tried blowing it off the Spirit convicted me, in effect making it clear to me that my mom was asking me to lead her through the gospel. So I did. "What do you believe about ... sin, self, and Savior?" She got to the end of it, not realizing that her final answer to me was a clean, simple profession of faith. I had the blessing of being used to lead my mom to express her faith, without any debate, argument, etc.

Her final question to me was precious, "but what if the elders of my church are not satisfied with my answers?" The joy of being able to respond to her still brings tears to my eyes, "Mom, they only want to make sure you are safe in Jesus, that you know him, know his love, and are trusting only in him for your salvation. If they think your answers aren't "good enough" they're not going to turn you away. Instead they will shepherd you, helping you to understand and believe in Jesus."

That was in 1999. Today my mom (since moving from that original location) is a steady and growing believer, a member of a small OPC church where she is learning to love Christ and His Bride. And regularly she and her doubting son (me) talk about the wonders of our mutual Savior.

Put your faith in God's promises attached to his ordinary means of grace. Encourage her to read the Bible, then as that moves the conversation forward, encourage her to attend a church that faithfully proclaims the gospel. Give her the promise of Rom 10:9-17 where God expressly states that this will be a means he uses to help us both learn and believe.

I'm praying with you. (Please, if you would, pray for my dad, who is still not saved.)
 
Gord,

Here's my main advice: Don't think of it as "dealing with" your mother. (As you've so-titled this thread.) From the way you've written the post, your mom is certainly not hostile to you and has not pushed you away from having relationship with her. So praise God for that. Also, your mom appears to be in want of a spiritual head to nurture and guide her. As her son, if her husband isn't able or willing to, then I suggest that you honor your mom by gently and consistently loving her and guiding her. Don't attempt it by commanding or nagging. But you can have insightful comments or suggestions on which she can reflect and ponder. As others have suggested, perhaps encourage her to read something from Scripture and then ask her about it at a later time.
This is a great opportunity for you, not a terrible burden! I'll pray for you... and your mom.
 
thank you all so much. such wonderful advice!

Reed! What a great story about your Mother. thank you for sharing.

Ben. I appreciate your advice as well. You're right. I should be thankful my Mom is even open to talking about God.

James and Kevin. Thank you for the advice, encouragement and the scripture.

And thanks to all for your prayers.
 
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