Do you give to the homeless?

Status
Not open for further replies.
AnnaBanana

AnnaBanana

Puritan Board Freshman
When you see someone standing on the side of the road (with a sign stating they are hungry, homeless, or in need) do you give money to them? Do you take them out somewhere to get something to eat? Do you share the Gospel? Do you give them food? Or do you do nothing?

Sometimes I am torn between giving (because I am not quite sure if that money would be contributing to something they are doing that they shouldn’t be doing).
 
I do not give money to them.

In college, I used to hang out with homeless people a lot and talk about the Bible with them. They called me the Bible Guy or something like that. A whole slew of them. They always asked for money or a shower, or etc, but always appreciated a good conversation. That's how I learned that Elijah was taken up in a Chariot by aliens, for example. This lasted my entire undergraduate experience.

Since college, I don't really have time to just hang out with them so much, but I have often offered to buy them something to eat or drink when they ask. I'll point at a restaurant and tell them "let's go right now, I'll buy you a meal." 95% of the time they reject it even though they were telling me they wanted money for food. I've been able to buy someone food about two to three times total in my entire life, and I've probably offered at least 50-100 times.

I have shared the Gospel with some, but not all. Sometimes if I see they are aggressive or not in their right mind, I might ignore them or move away from them as it can be pretty discomforting. Giving eye contact is hard because many times giving a nod to their presence is for them permission to be pursued and begged at. So as I've gotten older, I've done it more... cautiously.

The homeless in my city can be pretty aggressive and violent. So we need to be careful.

I had a late-friend in Indianapolis who would go around taking photographs of the homeless for the homeless. He wanted to give them dignity. I shadowed him a few times doing this and got to meet many of the homeless people there in Indy. When he suddenly died at the age of 49, I took the day off work and went to Indy to talk to all the homeless people I had met before. I talked to them and they really cared about Dave. I recorded what they had to say and gave those words to the people who attended his memorial service. People had no idea that he had done this.

You can still see Dave Haley's pictures here. I still miss him.
 
Last edited:
We live in small city of 15,000. One day last summer a figure appeared at a busy intersection, sitting in a camp chair with head down, covered by a hoodie. We learned we had a female, homeless and with mental illness seeking help.

Day by day we saw bags of groceries, coolers, clothing, blankets, and even a tent materialize for her benefit. We learned that the police checked on her frequently and helped her with resources for safe housing.

Our police chief said he got more calls about her than any other topic in his career and that individuals, churches and businesses were clamboring to help.

She stayed a couple of weeks then found housing in a larger city. We missed her, loved her and prayed for her as a community.
 
Last edited:
Sometimes a handout is helpful, but many times it is counterproductive. It's impossible to tell without knowing the person.

If you want to help someone who's needy, get to know them. Many will resist this, but some will welcome it. I seldom give a handout without speaking to the person. I sometimes will give after a brief conversation. I prefer to give to people I know well and will see again.
 
I do not give to them financially but I offer other assistance such as direcitons to ministries ect..

Several years ago I used to volunteer with a homeless ministry on Pittsburgh's North Side. We would head out on Friday nights with Soup, sandwiches and water to their living areas (don't recommend this because its very dangerous). What I learned is that Pittsburgh has a lot of ministries, government programs and soup kitchens which I believe most cities have. Because of this reason I was told never to give them money but point them to those ministries.

Most of them were diagnosed with a form of mental illness from a psychology perspective. For some their knowledge of scripture was amazing but they always distorted its words especially in terms of the gospel and the resurrection. I ultimately credit this to a spiritual battle and possibly demon possession.
 
No, though I will buy them food when opportunity presents. I've often had them disappear on me when I come back with food, however. While I do not regard 2 Thess 3:10 as giving an inflexible rule that applies in all circumstances, I do believe it teaches that our responsibility to be good stewards of our possessions extends even to our charity. If you don't know the person and they are homeless there is a good chance the money you give them gets spent on dissolution. I worked with homeless people for a time years back and I saw a lot of it. Even worse, in major urban areas some of the more prominent beggars are tied to organized crime.
 
Generally, no, but Saturday a man panhandled me for the quarter out of the buggy at Aldi. I had spoken to him on the way in. As I went in, a lady left her buggy with the quarter in it (which he could have gotten at that point, but he left the buggy for me). So it really wasn't my quarter, it was the quarter of the lady from earlier. I mentioned that to the man when I gave him the quarter.

So it's a philosophical question. Did I give him money, or not?
 
Edward said:
Generally, no, but Saturday a man panhandled me for the quarter out of the buggy at Aldi. I had spoken to him on the way in. As I went in, a lady left her buggy with the quarter in it (which he could have gotten at that point, but he left the buggy for me). So it really wasn't my quarter, it was the quarter of the lady from earlier. I mentioned that to the man when I gave him the quarter.

So it's a philosophical question. Did I give him money, or not?
Click to expand...

She abandoned the money. You claimed it and then gave it away.
 
AnnaBanana said:
When you see someone standing on the side of the road (with a sign stating they are hungry, homeless, or in need) do you give money to them? Do you take them out somewhere to get something to eat? Do you share the Gospel? Do you give them food? Or do you do nothing?
Click to expand...

Here's some stuff I never shared on the PB before. Get ready. :)

That's funny. I have got to show this to my wife. Two and a half years ago we took in a homeless 67-year old man. TODAY, finally—my wife is showing him around an apartment that a group called Family Promise is paying for. The homeless man, who is not all there mentally was a real trial. He was truly homeless, and here's the clincher. He's my brother-in-law. Initially, we took him in for two months an now it been 30 l-o-n-g months. We laugh a lot about this because there is a much longer story that we might tell someday. Mary and I got married in 1973. Since then, except for the first two months of our marriage, we have never been alone. Scores of men and women have passed through our revolving doors. We have bailed strangers out of jail. We've been robbed several times by some of the less than thankful people we took in. We no longer even hope to have anything like a life savings account. We spent what was at that time our small savings bailing out a heroin addict friend of mine, still suffering from recent knife wounds. A short time later my "friend" broke in and stold my vintage Less Paul low-impedance studio bass. What a long strange trip it's been (apologies to the Grateful Dead) Of course we gave the Gospel to everyone whether or not they were interested.

OK, I'll add one real story to show how early this nutty practice began. On our honeymoon, we picked up a very large, well fat black hitchhiker as we traveled South through some North Carolina back roads. Rather than try to describe his rough appearance I will continue with my story. It seems he was going our way no matter where that way was. After a while, we stopped at a gas station. What a sight we were. After filling the car, the attendant knocked softly on my window and whispered, "Are you in trouble?" "What do you mean," I answered. Still whispering the attendant told me about the note under the gas cap which read, "Help! We are being kidnapped." I never knew the note was there, but one of my friends had written it along with the total redecoration all over our car by the wedding guests.

We were brand new starry-eyed Christians with a verse of Scripture that we may have gone a little overboard on.

Matthew 5:42
Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away.​

What have we learned in those 45 years? I will tell a little of the lessons learned if there is any interest in my kinda weird post. But it's all true and still continues.
 
Last edited:
I used to carry sandwiches in my purse whenever I went downtown for when people asked for money. We didn't have enough to eat out ourselves back then so couldn't buy other people meals. One person seemed really glad for the sandwich instead (I can't say that others did :) -- maybe they didn't look very good! I'm not a great cook ...). He thanked me so gratefully and started eating it right away. I was so glad I had it in my purse that day.
 
Ed Walsh said:
Scores of men and women have passed through our revolving doors. We have bailed strangers out of jail. We've been robbed several times by some of the less than thankful people we took in. We no longer even hope to have anything like a life savings account.
Click to expand...

If no one has cared enough about you all to say this, I will. Of course, in my usual direct, undiplomatic style.

You all are slow learners with no sense of discernment. You need to man up and be more protective of your wife. You need to add the word "NO" to your vocabulary.

By enabling these people, you are hurting them rather than helping them. If you want to spend money, buy some decent locks and a shotgun. Lose the hippie mentality. "For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat."
 
Ed Walsh said:
What have we learned in those 45 years? I will tell a little of the lessons learned if there is any interest in my kinda weird post. But it's all true and still continues.
Click to expand...

I would like to hear the stories and the lessons.
 
Everyone I have talked to that has worked extensively with the homeless say never to give them money. Instead, we support a local gospel mission monthly who does work far beyond what we could ever do and give homeless people an excellent shot at a normal life if they want it.

If we didn't have this ministry in our city, I would probably work through the local church in some way and support people who are equipped and passionate to provide help. It is really easy to get taken advantage of and hurting more than helping.
 
Edward said:
You need to man up and be more protective of your wife.
Click to expand...

I appreciate the advice and should say that I was a bit flippant in the way I presented my stories. And believe me, the half has not been told. And we also made mistakes. But to your criticism, I should add that very few of the people we helped were able to work. At least not while they were with us. Our mistakes were what the last sentence in my post was to offer if there was any interest. There was my Alzheimer's crazed grandmother, her sister with no one else in the family willing to help, my son who had been disabled for years. Tyndale even published the story of our care for her. One Family's Journey Through Alzheimer's. We never went looking for them. They just kept coming. It was hard on our kids at times. Some of it was unwise to be sure. I never was a hippie — no flowers in our hair. I was higher class than that. I was what they called a "freak" back then. Front row at Woodstock t' boot. Sever were schizophrenics, my troubled brother in law has OCD so bad he was forced to stop working. Then his mother died, and he was on the street. I took two and a half years to get him any help. My wife wrote to over 20 services for the aging. There were few if any that were not in desperate need at the time. And it was my wife that found most of them. Just saying.
ofjcover.jpg
​
PS - I never leave home unarmed.
 
I don't usually, but we did just today. I carry very little cash, usually nothing, but mostly $10 or less. So, this is not a life-changing sum. My preference is to buy a meal, if possible. But generally, I figure I have plenty. If someone else is asking, I can give.

On the other hand, there are some "usual suspects" around where I work that are clearly not being sincere, in which case I decline politely. But insofar as I have been able to discern my own heart, I have felt that in the past I have used ostensibly legitimate reasons for denying aid that were really covers for my own stinginess.

Still, though, I don't always know the right thing to do.
 
In my little town there is a regular panhandler who confided in me that he stashes his earnings into a Roth IRA.

He is on disability, has section 8 housing, and three different signs for different intersections.
 
ZackF said:
Since Roth is supposed to be from earned income what does he declare?
Click to expand...

Well, I don't do his books, but I know he works part time at a body-shop. Probably makes below the SSI cutoff, but enough to contribute to an IRA.
 
Ed Walsh said:
Give me an hour or so to talk to my wife to be sure we are on the same page.
Click to expand...

What we have learned. Hmm.

We learned that we did too much. But at the time it always seemed unavoidable. My grandmother worked for years in a nursing home which had less than the best reputation. She grew to fear nursing homes more than death itself. So when she and her sister were unable to keep their home, they moved in with us after asking us to promise not to place her in a nursing home. She wanted to die at home. It was not wise, but we promised. That was a mistake, but she was doing fine at the time. The Alzheimer's epidemic was in its early stages, and there were few resources available. But over the years her condition deteriorated as she suffered a manic form of Alzheimer's and often nearly terrorized the household. We catch her trying to get the babies out of the wall by placing a knife in the electric socket, and many similar things. But, "He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not." (Psalm 15:4) It was not until near the end that we had to put her where she could get better care. During the last six years of her illness, we had four children ages four through twelve. This was NOT good for my family, or was it? I'm still not sure. It was very hard on my wife who bore most of the burden as I had to make money during the day. Many times I had to leave work to be home in a crisis. I think the promise was unwise in the extreme, but a promise it was. We would have never made the promise if we knew the consequences. We learned to keep our word, and we discovered that we made a promise harmful (in my opinion) to our young family.

Similar circumstances surrounded most of the other visitors, but I fear that you would quickly lose interest if I told them all. We also learned that there was, at least in those days, very few people, churches, and government services willing to help.

I think God gives different callings to each of us. What about foreign missionaries? They often risk a lot more than we did and are blameless. My final defense for the challenging life we had is to say again that we did not look for these people. They came to us wounded, sick and sore. And I think most left better than they came.
 
When we know we are passing through an area that has homeless/the poor, we buy extra foods and supplies and give them this food or supplies if we see them.

Please read Jonathan Edwards on our Duty of Charity to the Poor, where he answers 11 objections to giving to the poor:

https://www.whatsbestnext.com/2014/...ing-to-the-poor-answered-by-jonathan-edwards/


11 Objections on Giving to the Poor Answered by Jonathan Edwards


"...Edwards not only goes into all the passages which command helping the poor as “one of the three chief duties of true religion” (Micah 6:8; Matthew 22:23; 1 John 3:17-19), but also all the commands to do this with great generosity. Then, he goes into the vast promises that God makes to those who help the poor. The promises Edwards outlines are amazing and incredible (Deuteronomy 15:10; Psalm 37:25-26; Proverbs 11:24-25; 12:9; 19:17; 28:27; Ecclesiastes 11:1-2, 6; Isaiah 32:8; Luke 6:35-36; 12:32-34; 14:13-26; 2 Corinthians 9:6-11), and show that the ultimate foundation and motive for helping the poor is not only love but also faith — faith in God to fulfill his promises. (Thus, refusal to help the poor reveals not only a lack of love for people, but also lack of faith.)

Edwards argues that “God, in his providence, generally smiles upon and prospers those men who are of a liberal, charitable, bountiful spirit,” whereas “God has threatened to follow with is curse those who are uncharitable to the poor [consider Proverbs 21:3; Ezekiel 16:49].” In calling Christians to take seriously these promises that God makes to generosity, he encourages us to remember:



...4. We may object to charity against particular persons, that we are not obliged to give them anything, for though they are needy, they are not yet in extreme need. They do meet with difficulty, but not so as they cannot live.

“It does not answer the rules of Christian charity, to relieve those only who are reduced to extremity.”

a. We are commanded to love one another as brothers and show pity: 1 Pt 3:8

Is it like brothers to refuse to help one another, except when extreme need?

“The rule of the gospel is, that when we see our brother under any difficulty or burden, we should be ready to bear the burden with him”: Gal 6:2

“The Christian spirit will make us apt to sympathize with our neighbor, when we see him under any difficulty.” Ro 12:15

“When our neighbor is in difficulty, he is afflicted; and we ought to have such a spirit of love to him, as to be afflicted with him in his affliction. And if we are afflicted with him, then it will follow, that we ought to be ready to relieve him; because, if we are afflicted with him, in relieving him we relieve ourselves.”

“Christianity teaches us to be afflicted in our neighbor’s affliction; and nature teaches us to relieve ourselves when afflicted.”

We are fellow travelers together. If brothers are on a journey together, and one meets with need, don’t they all help?

We should not be overly exact and fearful lest we give others too much.

b. Loving our neighbor only when he is in extreme need does not fit with the fact that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves.

We do not wait until we ourselves are in extreme need to meet our own needs; so neither should we wait until our neighbor is in extreme need.



5. We may object against charity to someone because he “deserves not that people should be kind to him.” He has a temper, an ungrateful spirit, and treated people poorly.

a. But Christ teaches us to love even our enemies.

And the parable of the Good Samaritan shows that our enemies are included in the command to “love your neighbor as yourself.”

b. We are commanded to love one another as Christ has loved us John 13:34

This opens up our duty to love in a new manner, and goes to a further degree than loving our neighbor as yourself.

Christ loved us so as to be willing to deny himself, and suffer greatly, in order to help us. So also we should be willing to deny ourselves, in order to help one another.

Christ loved us though we were far below him.

Christ loved us though we were unable to repay him.

Christ loved us, though we were evil and hateful and not deserving any good.

Christ loved us though we were his enemies and had treated him ill.

c. Many particular rules also oblige us in this way.

We are to be kind to the unthankful and evil, thus following the example of God Mt 5:45


...7. We may object that we do not know whether a particular person is an object of charity or not. We do not fully know their circumstances or what sort of person they are. Or how he came to be in want, and whether it was by his own idleness and wastefulness. Thus they argue that they cannot be obliged, until they know these things.

a. This was Nabal’s objection, for which he is condemned in Scripture: 1 Sam 25

“This story is doubtless told us partly for this end, to discountenance too great a scrupulosity as to the object on whom we bestow our charity, and the making of this merely an objection against charity to others, that we do not certainly know their circumstances.”

“It is better to give to several that are not objects of charity, than to send away empty one that is.”

b. We are commanded to be kind to strangers whom we know not, nor their circumstances.

We are not to neglect to entertain strangers, for by such some have entertained angels: Heb 13:2
 
Some other thoughts:

--Context is important. Folks begging in the US versus overseas is different.

And this does not necessarily mean you should give overseas and be cautious in the US (in some parts of India, for example, there are syndicates that pass around crippled babies, etc, like doing shifts, and then they give their bosses a cut). Knowing the cultural context is important.

---Getting to know the poor/homeless is advised.

---But, if in doubt, it is better To give away a sandwich to a scammer is better than to deny food to the truly hungry. If a person cheats me by claiming to need food, I am not wrong...he is....

---Feeding the hungry is not enabling. Or giving a blanket to a homesless person in the winter (even if that person is an addict) is not enabling. It is compassion. Even stupid or evil people should not have to freeze to death.

---If we rationalize that it is good they are cold or hungry in order to teach them to not do drugs or to learn how not to be lazy...well, that only works for a rational person. If they are mentally ill or high, this argument does not work.


---If in doubt, do the merciful thing.
 
Throughout my seminary years my wife worked f0r a rescue mission, and I dealt with the homeless on a number of occasions first hand.

In considering how to help them, this one story is a great part of where my experiential view comes from. In driving to the mission one afternoon, a homeless man was standing by the side of the road with a sign. He looked homeless. He looked needy. however, having dealt with so many of them at the mission, I stopped the car, rolled down my window, and shouted out to him, (he was across the street from me) "Why don't you go down to the rescue mission which is less than a 1/4 mile from here. You'll get a bed, three squares, and they'll give you work." He absolutely refused to go there, quite adamantly. All he wanted was drug or alcohol money, I can't remember which, and waived me off.

Switch gears. This is the only story I have of someone actually in need, and truly homeless. (I'm sure more exist, but in three years at school in the Orlando area, I only have this one story.) When I say homeless, I mean on the street, they need help, want help, will do whatever to get real help.

My boss, at the time, was driving home from church one Sunday, and passed by a woman, very finely dressed, like for a business meeting, holding a homeless sign standing on the off ramp. This was a very odd sight. Homeless sign + finely dressed business woman in heels and such. My boss turned his car around (with his whole family in it) and parked by her on the road and inquired as to why she was on the side of the road holding a homeless sign. She, in fact, was a woman of business, lost her job, lost her money, lost her home, lost everything except for a few suitcases of clothes and such, and wound up on the side of the road needing help. She never did drugs, was not an alcoholic, etc. etc. He picked her up, gave her a place to stay, ministered to her, and helped her get back on her feet.

I tend not to give money to anyone in the first situation. I'd be happy to help in the second. For both, though, I've preached the Gospel while people are swinging screwdrivers at me, people yelling, some people listening, very few at any prolonged conversing, many drunk, etc. I've never personally seen a homeless person converted under preaching either in the ministry we had in my first church, or from like-minded neighboring churches. They will certainly pop in and ask for a handout, but even after preaching to them, or any kind of prolonged kindness, I've not seen any stick around. I only say that from experience.
 
Ed Walsh said:
Similar circumstances surrounded most of the other visitors, but I fear that you would quickly lose interest if I told them all. We also learned that there was, at least in those days, very few people, churches, and government services willing to help.
Click to expand...

I had mywife Mary read the thread. Here's some of her thoughts:

From my perspective...

A lock on our door and a shotgun could not have stayed the Providence of God. My husband has-perhaps a bit flippantly- described some often profound experiences we have been through. We learned from all of them.

Initially-before we had children- we were simply zealous, excited, joyful new Christians. We wanted to turn the world upside down for Christ-and we did our best. We were tagged the "God Squad" by all of our former friends. We were that zealous and at times, I'm sure, obnoxious. We did pick up hitchhikers, but that was not uncommon back in the '70s.
Ed brought one home to stay for a few weeks-not a wise move, as we later realized. Thankfully our first dog was a 100-pound Malmute that looked like a polar bear-a no-nonsense looking creature. I kept him close by my side at all times. (better than a shotgun any day)

A few of the people the Lord placed in our path-and at times in our spare room, had limited days to live. Only we were not aware of that. These were not old people-quite young in fact. We shared the gospel with them, cared for them and found out weeks, months later they had died- suddenly.
Those experiences were so profound that we felt we were right where we were supposed to be in the Lord's plan.

Our decision to move my husband's grandmother and aunt into our mother/daughter home was a well thought out plan-a way for us to buy a home and help them in their old age as well.

The unknown-God's Providence- was the Alzheimer's that gradually took over our grandmother's brain-and our lives for the next seven years.

What we have found, is that once you are fully immersed in these situations, they must be seen through until the Lord-mercifully provides an answer. That is where the rubber meets the road-so to speak-when there are no easy answers.

Our second son was stricken in his early 20's-not too long after Ed's grandmother passed away, with a complex set of physical problems--three years bedridden--God's Providence once again--


Love the thoughts below...

"---Feeding the hungry is not enabling. Or giving a blanket to a homeless person in the winter (even if that person is an addict) is not enabling. It is compassion. Even stupid or evil people should not have to freeze to death.

---If we rationalize that it is good they are cold or hungry in order to teach them to not do drugs or to learn how not to be lazy...well, that only works for a rational person. If they are mentally ill or high, this argument does not work.


---If in doubt, do the merciful thing."

Our most recent 'house guest' was not actually invited. He was part of my 'inheritance' after my mother passed away and left me as executrix of her estate. After four years of showing the house-with my brother still living there, the house finally sold. I literally drove him from her house to ours-realizing he was now homeless.
Unable to work for many years due to psychiatric issues he was now --our project. Two and a half years later-a very difficult two and a half years, many letters and phone calls later seeking help/housing for him-our prayers were answered. He will be moving to an apartment in about a week-with services in place to help him. We realize now, that he is in much better shape in every way than he was when he arrived here.
(..I can't say with certainty that I am!)

....I am hoping for a break--but realistically have to ask-what's next Lord?
 
Last edited:
May your own works praise you in the gates, Mary. And may you meet many of these people in heaven. I pray that whatever God sends next will be restful in ways you need.
 
@Ed Walsh
@Pergamum

Thanks, Brother (and Sister) Walsh! And you, too, Trevor, who have given so much of yourself in all your service! Thanks especially for the Edwards's material.

Your service in the ways described is refreshing and encouraging. May the Lord bless you now and eternally for it!

We all make many mistakes (and commit many sins) in serving. The one that we don't want to make is hiding the talent and not putting it to use.

Always remember, we answer above all to Christ for the shape of our service and devotion: we will stand before Him who is our common Lord (Romans 14:4).

Peace,
Alan
 
One time as we were finishing up fellowship meal at a former church I was a member of (which was in an urban area), someone came asking for money for food. A deacon and his wife kindly helped him get several plates worth of various delicious, home-cooked meals. He didn't want any then, so they were made to go. He then threw them on the ground right outside the building as he continued walking as he left. I assume the reason was that he didn't want food, but money, but it was disappointing to experience.
 
A dear friend has in his car kits he's made with protein bars, a brief overview of the gospel, toiletries, and items that could help someone on the streets. This is an idea I want to explore. The items help, won't go bad, and don't involve cash. We frequently have homeless in our library during cold days, and I'd love to know how to bridge the gap that necessarily exists between strangers.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

Richard King
  • Locked
When do you give up and walk away from a sinning brother?
Replies
12
Views
2K
Puritanhead
P
T
  • Locked
Approached by a Homeless Person
Replies
19
Views
3K
Pergamum
P
bradofshaw
  • Locked
Homeless Saints: A proposed solution
Replies
7
Views
2K
crhoades
crhoades
Backwoods Presbyterian
  • Locked
  • Poll
What Do You Know/Can You Do When it Comes to Cars?
Replies
11
Views
2K
Marrow Man
Marrow Man
C
  • Locked
Do you know who listens to the White Horse Inn?
Replies
6
Views
2K
daveb
D
Back
Top