Extreme fear and doubt. please HELP because I feel like all hope is lost.

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Please don't make it personal when you negatively refer to me / my character – in the midst of a theological discussion – coming close to mocking and bearing false witness. Stick to the ideas and Scriptures we are talking of, not our characters. You can make fun of my ideas if you like – though I do seek to base them on Scripture.

Dear Brother, Steve,

I just reread what I wrote and I certainly see where I was in error. There is no excuse for me writing that way. Please forgive me. I consider you a solid Christian and Godly man. I guess that is all I have to say.

Thanks for listening,

Ed
 
Two things may be true at the same time:

1) Chris's fears about where modern society is going are not unfounded. Just look at certain parts of Australia, which almost make 1984 look like a fairytale.

2) Chris lacks perspective because he has forgotten that these builders of modern Babel are not more powerful than God, who will eventually destroy their wicked schemes. The Lord may not destroy them as quickly as we would like, but our wishes are beside the point.

I seriously recommending meditating upon and singing Psalms 37 and 73 to get some sense of perspective.
 
Thanks for your tender heart in this, Ed! Of course I forgive you.

Part of the "problem" with me is that every evening – for years now – I almost always read the prayer booklet sent bi-monthly from Barnabas Aid on the persecuted and/or suffering church around the globe. It is heart-rending to read of our brothers and sisters, elderly and children, and what they go through for their faith in and love for Jesus Christ. This has affected me. I take it to be the "little season" of satan's loosing in progress.

I see it coming here too, in the U.S. – but slower – as we are the last bastion against the hordes of darkness seeking to silence the open and strong gospel proclamation in that political entity that I think is the headquarters nation of whore Babylon, which has not yet morphed into the drinker of the saints' blood. May the remnant of Christ's company of men and women make Him proud in that day.
 
Read, meditate, and sing Psalm 73.

I thought about which verses to quote and paste here, but I would have to simply paste the whole Psalm.

73 Truly God is good to Israel, even to such as are of a clean heart.

2 But as for me, my feet were almost gone; my steps had well nigh slipped.

3 For I was envious at the foolish, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

4 For there are no bands in their death: but their strength is firm.

5 They are not in trouble as other men; neither are they plagued like other men.

6 Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment.

7 Their eyes stand out with fatness: they have more than heart could wish.

8 They are corrupt, and speak wickedly concerning oppression: they speak loftily.

9 They set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth.

10 Therefore his people return hither: and waters of a full cup are wrung out to them.

11 And they say, How doth God know? and is there knowledge in the most High?

12 Behold, these are the ungodly, who prosper in the world; they increase in riches.

13 Verily I have cleansed my heart in vain, and washed my hands in innocency.

14 For all the day long have I been plagued, and chastened every morning.

15 If I say, I will speak thus; behold, I should offend against the generation of thy children.

16 When I thought to know this, it was too painful for me;

17 Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then understood I their end.

18 Surely thou didst set them in slippery places: thou castedst them down into destruction.

19 How are they brought into desolation, as in a moment! they are utterly consumed with terrors.

20 As a dream when one awaketh; so, O Lord, when thou awakest, thou shalt despise their image.

21 Thus my heart was grieved, and I was pricked in my reins.

22 So foolish was I, and ignorant: I was as a beast before thee.

23 Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast holden me by my right hand.

24 Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.

26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.

27 For, lo, they that are far from thee shall perish: thou hast destroyed all them that go a whoring from thee.

28 But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord God, that I may declare all thy works.
 
@deuteronomist / Chris,

What may be a real help to your heart and mind is to comprehend the LORD's power and His plan in these darkening days. What is called Amillennial eschatology (the study of the end times) shows that the very many times when it has looked dark and awful for God's believing remnant up through the church age, His glory and majesty has accompanied them into His loving presence.

If you think to discern by sight instead of by faith you will continue to be devastated. Why not, as His child, see by the vision of the Holy Spirit in His word:

For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal. (2 Cor 4:16,17,18)​

There are a number of us here praying for you, Chris! We are in this together.
 
goodness! I will go through every post. I talked to a counselor from my church and I'm doing better, not perfect, but better. Thank you so much for the flurry of responses!

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I'm still reading through. I really don't know how to use this website well. (Also browsers and websites have been getting slow since at least some time in 2020). i'm fumbling with the quote button so I'm giving up on that for now.


Whoever said stop listening to gary demar, i know almost nothing about him, but what he was saying was meant to ENCOURAGE listeners in trying times. I'm the kind of person who thinks and crossexamines to the point of EXTREME excess. I several brain chemistry/structure problems which contribute to my doubt. However, my faith is being strengthened and I can feel it. I was disagreeing with demar, (tbh I don't quite remember the topic), precisely BECAUSE of how apocalyptic I think. Apologies for being way off topic, but I'm amillennial simply because i got a lot of exposure to dispensationalism in my youth (though was essentially a deist at the time and didn't realize it until after became converted by the power of the Spirit). I didn't even KNOW the term dispensationalism. when i found out that stuff was all nonsense i lost all interest in end times speculation because of how fruitless it is. anyway, the reason WHY made this post is, whatever demar said which i dont remember, ran ran off with my thoughts and had a massive breakdown due to how the situation to me looked (and does look, dw not upset), that the horrific crimes exacted against our ancient jewish brothers or our brothers in the roman empire are incomparible to how LITTLE we suffer here in the west, it is that I believe that the roman empire most likely couldnt physically wipe out us out. never-ending whack a mole. I might be wrong about that. But that's what i suspect.

^ apologies for extensive typoes and bad sentence structure. I wanted tomake sure I didn't lose my thoughts so I was typing them as fast as I could! I have very frustrating short term memory issues.

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Yeah i was feeling VERY blackpilled! I'm doing better now, not great, but I KNOW the Lord is helping me by soothing my heart.

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I want to say to Puritanboard may God bless you guys. Thank you so much.
 
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Glad to hear you've gotten some help, Chris. May the Lord strengthen in you a faith which does not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God. Negative appearances, at that point, become irrelevant.

FYI, I removed your avatar. We don't allow images that purport to be of Christ, because of the 2nd Commandment. The rationale is spelled out in the Westminster Larger Catechism:

Q. 109. What are the sins forbidden in the second commandment?
A. The sins forbidden in the second commandment are, all devising, counselling, commanding, using, and anywise approving, any religious worship not instituted by God himself; tolerating a false religion; the making any representation of God, of all, or of any of the three Persons, either inwardly in our mind, or outwardly in any kind of image or likeness of any creature whatsoever; all worshipping of it, or God in it or by it; the making of any representation of feigned deities, and all worship of them, or service belonging to them; all superstitious devices, corrupting the worship of God, adding to it, or taking from it, whether invented and taken up of ourselves, or received by tradition from others, though under the title of antiquity, custom, devotion, good intent, or any other pretence whatsoever; simony; sacrilege; all neglect, contempt, hindering, and opposing the worship and ordinances which God hath appointed.
 
Yeah i was feeling VERY blackpilled! I'm doing better now, not great, but I KNOW the Lord is helping me by soothing my heart.

Chris, if I remember, I will send you a video against becoming black pilled in a private message later this evening. If I forget, send me a message to remind me. The black pilled mindset is really the coward's way out; instead of manfully resisting evil, it gives people an excuse to do nothing in the face of it. And, as Edmund Burke told us, we all know what happens when good men do nothing.
 
OH goodness ill remove the avatar immmediately.

EDIT:
SORRY!
an admin removed it. Thank you. I'm REALLY sorry about that. I'm SO HAPPY right now that I found one of my favorite memes. I feel very encouraged. I apologize.

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@Reformed Covenanter Thank you brother. I will meditate on those psalms. thank you.
 
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