Genesis 3:16 Woman's desire shall be for her husband

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Richard King

Puritan Board Senior
16 To the woman he said,

"œI will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be for [5] your husband,
and he shall rule over you."



Okay, I have heard more than one Bible teacher put a spin on this that indicates this desire as a negative thing as if the woman's desire shall be to usurp or overthrow he husband and that will always be her nature. I sure don't get that. Am I missing something by taking God's word at face value here?
 
Yes, I have heard that too. Clarke's commentary speaks of this a bit when he says
"Gen 3:16 -
Unto the woman he said - She being second in the transgression is brought up the second to receive her condemnation, and to hear her punishment: I will greatly multiply, or multiplying I will multiply; i.e., I will multiply thy sorrows, and multiply those sorrows by other sorrows, and this during conception and pregnancy, and particularly so in parturition or child-bearing. And this curse has fallen in a heavier degree on the woman than on any other female. Nothing is better attested than this, and yet there is certainly no natural reason why it should be so; it is a part of her punishment, and a part from which even God´s mercy will not exempt her. It is added farther, Thy desire shall be to thy husband - thou shalt not be able to shun the great pain and peril of child-bearing, for thy desire, thy appetite, shall be to thy husband; and he shall rule over thee, though at their creation both were formed with equal rights, and the woman had probably as much right to rule as the man; but subjection to the will of her husband is one part of her curse; and so very capricious is this will often, that a sorer punishment no human being can well have, to be at all in a state of liberty, and under the protection of wise and equal laws."

Okay, I can only speak for myself and the ladies I have spoken with about this....From a woman's perspective, I actually see it especially for the married woman, 1 Cor 7:34 says, "The woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may PLEASE HER HUSBAND. "

Many times , some of us ladies have a nasty tendancy to want the comefort, security, fellowship, approval etc, from our husnands that only the LORD can give. No human can fulfill that, yet over and over it is easy to slip into that tendancy. We desire from the depths of our hearts to please our husbands in every way, but then want back what only God can give. In that personal way, it really is a curse.

Similar, in a modern day application of Adam's curse, (yes the ground and Adams life was changed... yet now men are destined to toil tilling the ground (job: farming or non-farming), yet it does not really end. They must work to accomplish the task, sometimes long hours, weekends, overtime....but There will always one more project, one more patient, one more...

In a way, it testifies to Ecc 1:2 "Vanity of vanities," says the Preacher, "Vanity of vanities! All is vanity."

Okay, a very, very non-traditional answer. Fire away!
(... now covering head and ducking...)
 
In examining the Hebrew words used here, the terminology indicates that the struggle for control within marriage is a consequence of sin and a direct result of the curse given in Genesis 3. The woman will be driven in her sinful desires to rule over her husband and he will in turn attempt to lord it over her and rule with harshness. Both are contrary to God's design for marriage where the wife willingly submits and the man lovingly leads (Eph 5:22-33).

The Hebrew word translated "desire" is the same word used in Gensis 4:7 where Cain is told that "sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it." So this desire is a lust for control, for dominance.

Phillip
 
So...
hmmm
that gives me some confusion but plenty to think on.
About that disire to wrestle the control away...
I don't feel that kind of thing going on between my wife and myself.
In fact she kind of hates it when I don't take charge. She gets very frustrated when I shrug off a decision and throw it on her.
The danger (I would think) is some guys use this take on the verse as one more way to put down a woman.
I know some guys who have preached this too me in their rants on how flawed women are. (yes, they are divorced experts on what the Bible says about women. Seems to be tons of those guys.)
Would it not be true that women are flawed as men are flawed. All born depraved etc.

I am not pushing womens lib here. I just always read it like a woman is going to have this sometimes unexplainable desire for her man... the way some women hang on to a guy that the rest of us can't believe she sees anything in. Almost like saying though the woman may have the advantage in terms of smarts she STILL is going to want a man to feel completed.

Thanks for the input. I am not one who knows the hebrew meanings or has much experience with commentaries.
 
Originally posted by pastorway
In examining the Hebrew words used here, the terminology indicates that the struggle for control within marriage is a consequence of sin and a direct result of the curse given in Genesis 3. The woman will be driven in her sinful desires to rule over her husband and he will in turn attempt to lord it over her and rule with harshness. Both are contrary to God's design for marriage where the wife willingly submits and the man lovingly leads (Eph 5:22-33).

The Hebrew word translated "desire" is the same word used in Gensis 4:7 where Cain is told that "sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it." So this desire is a lust for control, for dominance.

Phillip

Phillip,

This is exactly how I have heard other competent Reformed Bible Expositors explain Gen 3:16.
 
Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.

Behind all my tongue-in-cheek patriarchial dominance ramblings, I whole-heartedly affirm the Apostle Paul's exhortation to husbands:


Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, ...
--Ephesians 5:25

That's a tall order, but may God give me the grace through his indwelling Holy Spirit to shower my future wife with sacrificial love, undying kindness and consideration. While the Bible affirms patriarchial authority in marriage, it also affirms mutual fealty and mutual submission. The woman's willingness to initially and actively submit to her husband plays a big role in reaping the fruits of a spritually uplifting, fulfilling and God-glorifying marriage.


Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates.
--Proverbs 31:29-31

Likewise, may God bless all you old people in your on-going marriage...
:D
 
The real point here is that the basic source for all family conflict can be traced right back to the fall and the curse. In fact, I preached a series of messages defining the Biblical roles for the family and the first sermon in the series was from Genesis 3 titled "The Source of Family Conflict."

The point is that while not everyone is a type A take control personality, there are other ways that the curse works its way out - there are ways to be passively rebellious to authority, ways to refuse to lead or be led that may not seem obvious on teh surface. And the bottom line is that sin causes us to rebel against God and His design.

Phillip
 
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