Augusta
Puritan Board Doctor
I was raised in a penecostal/charismatic church my whole life. All of this is like greek to me...literally.
I am slowly accepting and understanding the reformed view of theology. I don't know what covenantal theology is. I am trying to learn this whole new language. Its worse than speaking in tongues.
Is there a dictionary of terms somewhere that I can use to look up words I haven't heard? I came to this whole thing by listening to R.C. Sproul on the radio. I had never ever heard of predestination or anything until I listened to him. Then I got on the internet and went to his website. That was 7 years ago. I have kind of kept it to myself mostly. Whenever I do pipe up you can imagine the looks and the response I get. Like I am demon possessed. I have been percolating silently. My husband now believes at least in the the predestination part. At first he rejected it vehemently but he is a very logical guy and eventually saw the logic behind it was undenyable. I did too but then when it first sunk in I had a sort of breakdown. I had just had my second child and I was just devastated theologically. My whole world was turned upside down and I had to face the fact that I didn't know God. I have been a Christian my whole life and I have always had a personal relationship with God in that I prayed and thought about God all the time. I remember vividly witnessing to a girl on the playground in grade school. I was very involved at my church youth group all through high school and college age. I got married very young because I had strict values and would not compromise. I have always had a very healthy respect for God's laws. I felt cheated out of a true portrayal of God and all his attributes. I was mad that predestination was true. I had a very hard time overcoming what had been drilled into me. That I chose God and not the other way around etc. At the same time it answered so many of my questions I just knew it was true. I let it fade into the background but found myself shaking my head and rolling my eyes at my pastor occasionally. I still attend a penecostal church. It is a Foursquare church. They are actually not so bad as these type of churches go. I also don't exactly understand what dispensationalism is. Is it word faith teaching. I am working up to getting my hubby to let us try the Presyterian church near us. He is not ready. Whats so funny is he was a non-practicing catholic when we got married and I sorta dragged him along to my church. I actually wouldn't marry him until he accepted Jesus which I was sure he could not possibly have done in a catholic church.
I was a nut. My whole family are just out there theologically. Why am I telling you my life story?? I guess because I need support just now and teaching. My hubby and I are currently listening to RC Sproul almost every night online. He just started his Systematic Theology series. We have also listened to others of his. Actually what spurred me on here was listening to a message by John Sartelle on there last night and he made a statement about Aarons sons who brought the strange fire to the altar and got toasted for it. And he equated that with the worship in evangelical churches and it sorta freaked me out. I have spoken against some weird stuff that came down the pike but luckily our church didn't get involved in it but I don't know. I am just going through a kind of paradigm shift here and its a little unnerving still. I am also studying whether I am going to believe in infant baptism because I will have to deal with that if I go to a Presbyterian church. We used to think we would be fine where we were at out current church where I have attended for 23 years and where I was married and baptised etc. It's just really big. I am having to undo years and years of teaching. I find new things all the time that predestination touches. I at first thought it wouldn't change much but it changes almost everything. I never never thought I would be questioning believer's baptism. I guess what I need is a reformed view 101. Some kind of website or something that can help a person who is totally new to the whole thing. If anyone has any advice please give it. Thanks for listening.


