How to pray better?

[Santiago DO]

I try to pray daily (private prayer after wake up and before going to bed) and circumstantially through the day. But I feel I don't pray enough (sometimes my private prayers are short ~5-15min) and don't pray correctly (Often I get distracted with my thoughts).

Can you please give me some advice to pray for the glory of God? Or recommend me books or sermons about this topic in a practical way (I think I know the theological importance, this is why I feel really bad about my prayer life)

Thank you so much.

 

[Jake]

A really good book on the topic is, A Method for Prayer by Matthew Henry. You can read it on-line here: https://www.matthewhenry.org/read/preface/

 

[Ed Walsh]

I try to pray daily (private prayer after wake up and before going to bed) and circumstantially through the day. But I feel I don't pray enough (sometimes my private prayers are short ~5-15min) and don't pray correctly (Often I get distracted with my thoughts).

Can you please give me some advice to pray for the glory of God? Or recommend me books or sermons about this topic in a practical way (I think I know the theological importance, this is why I feel really bad about my prayer life)

Hi Santiago,

This brief answer will have to be just a teaser for now. I have some things I need to take care of right now. But I'll try to write back sometime this morning.

But my first response is -- Of course, you don't know how to pray correctly. No Christian does. Even the Apostle Paul said he didn't know how to pray.
After doing it wrong for the first 45 years I was a Christian, I finally gave up trying to pray about five years ago. Here's the paradox. Now I really pray, and in a soul-satisfying way.

Ed

 

[Polanus1561]

I love EM Bounds, when read discernly, on this.

 

[Ed Walsh]

This brief answer will have to be just a teaser for now. I have some things I need to take care of right now. But I'll try to write back sometime this morning.​

I’m still busy, but I wanted to get back briefly. Be sure to read the work of John Bunyan. He said it a lot better than I could anyway.
See the attached PDF of Bunyan.

I WILL PRAY WITH THE SPIRIT AND WITH THE UNDERSTANDING ALSO
OR
A DISCOURSE TOUCHING PRAYER
WHEREIN IS BRIEFLY DISCOVERED
1. WHAT PRAYER IS. 2. WHAT IT IS TO PRAY WITH THE SPIRIT.
3. WHAT IT IS TO PRAY WITH THE SPIRIT AND WITH THE UNDERSTANDING ALSO
Bunyan, J. (2006). A Discourse Touching Prayer (Vol. 1, p. 621). Logos Bible Software.​

The main thing I learned is that God isn’t particularly interested in your ideas of what, who, and how to pray. True prayer requires the help of the Holy Spirit. And I don’t mean the general day in and day out indwelling Spirit. I am talking about the felt presence of the Spirit aiding you in all aspects of your prayer. The very best thing you have going for you is your dissatisfaction with what you are doing now. The Pharisees loved to pray long flowery prayers to get a reward from other people.

The first step is to know deeply that we, unaided by the Spirit, are all but useless in prayer. That’s why you are you are dissatisfied with both the content and duration of your prayer times. I am sure you know the verse below from Romans 8, but you must come to know it deep in your heart by faith (and yes, personal failure). The unaided Christian can’t please the Lord, except for the prayers for His help. I don’t mean this absolutely. I guess I often pray through the day with a please here and a thank you there, which is acceptable to God. But when you get down to the serious duty of prayer, you should feel that you are in way over your head--because you are. It is not only the Gentiles who think they will be heard for their much speaking (Matthew 6:7), but it can be true of us also. Otherwise, Jesus would not need to give the warning.

Romans 8:26-27​

Likewise, the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought:​

but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.​

And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.​

Some consider Romans 8:26 as if it taught, We know how to pray up to a point, but we need the Spirit to fill in the blanks.

Consider and meditate on the following statements by Jesus.

John 15:5 (KJV)​

I am the vine; ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit:​

for without me, ye can do nothing.​

Lest you think I am exaggerating, even the Lord Jesus confessed His utter dependence on God for everything He said and did in the time of His humility.

John 5:30 (KJV)​

I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.​

Is praying in the Spirit easy? Far from it. He can lead you to the heights of joy unspeakable, as well as a dark horror at your own heart or the desperate need of the Church. I sometimes get so lost in prayer and praise that I almost forget where I am. And I always forget much of the detail of my prayer. The very best part for me is the life and vigor the Spirit gives you to praise God and long for His glory in a way that is far beyond anything you can do on your own. You will sometimes end your prayer time in both exhilaration and physical exhaustion. Yes, praying is hard work, but it is the closest you can get to the heavenly realm.

Nehemiah 9:5 (KJV)​

Then the Levites, Jeshua, Kadmiel, Bani, Hashabneiah, Sherebiah, Hodiah, Shebaniah, and Pethahiah, said,​

“Stand up and bless the Lord your God from everlasting to everlasting.​

Blessed be your glorious name, which is exalted above all blessing and praise.​

Now, I will leave you to Bunyan.

Ed
[pardon any typos-I was in a rush]

 

[Relztrah]

This is a great little 32-page booklet published by P&R. It's not as in-depth as most books on prayer but I find it helpful and encouraging. It's $4.00 on the P&R website but I bought it on Amazon.com because I had a gift card.

 

[D.L. Arter]

I recommend learning how to utilize Scripture for prayer. Praying through psalms and other biblical prayers has helped my own prayer life to grow. In addition, I recommend Valley of Vision, it's a collection of Puritan prayers and I typically recommend that people pray through one a day. Of course, you do have to distinguish between praying and reading psalms, biblical prayers, and other written prayers. And you'll always want to be sure that you are genuinely praying and not just reciting what you're reading.

 

[Vernon]

I was told almost fifty years ago [I know the timing because it was during my Bible College years, which I can date] that Martin Luther once said that he had to pray at least three hours a day because he was too busy not to do so. I have never come across that citation, so perhaps it is just a bit of lore. (Perhaps someone could help with the verification.) Whether true or not, there is wisdom to the sentiment. Since God is gracious to order our lives, time spent in prayer is beneficial. However, some difficulties are present. To set prayer time by the clock smacks of formality, and perhaps the “much speaking” and “vain jangling” of the gentiles that we want to avoid. And, strangely, some might ask if three hours is indeed enough. After all, did not the apostle say “pray without ceasing”?

Regarding the “without ceasing“ mandate, I have long struggled. At first blush, it sounds like an injunction to speak directly to God every moment, which may not even have been achieved by Simeon Stylites. It helped me recently to consider the words of Samuel: “Moreover, as for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by ceasing to pray for you” (1 Sam. 12:23).

These three paragraphs have only raised questions. Let me say, briefly, that learning to pray has been for me a very long journey. In short, the closer God draws me to him through prayer, the more I relish time spent with him.

 

[aaronsk]

Martin Luther wrote a book for his barber on the subject when he asked a very similar question.

https://www.ligonier.org/store/simple-way-to-pray-paperback

"No book has done more to revolutionize my personal prayer life than this little book by Martin Luther. I would recommend it for every Christian’s library."
—R.C. Sproul

 

[Joshua]

Brother, one thing that was instantly of help to me was to pray with the Larger Catechism's guide to the Lord's Prayer, Questions 189-196. They are good kick-start in my own estimation, to helping form an outline. It's helpful to read and consider questions 178-185 as occasional refresher.

 

[Vernon]

Martin Luther wrote a book for his barber on the subject when he asked a very similar question.

https://www.ligonier.org/store/simple-way-to-pray-paperback

Thanks Aaron. I found an online copy and did a skim-read to see if that is the source of the quote. I didn’t find it.

 

[aaronsk]

Thanks Aaron. I found an online copy and did a skim-read to see if that is the source of the quote. I didn’t find it.

Didnt find what?

 

[Taylor]

Didnt find what?

He mentioned a quote here supposed to be from Luther where he said he prays because he’s too busy not to.

 

[aaronsk]

Ah sorry I see. I was just suggesting the work to the OP. Im not familiar with where that particular Luther quote might be.

 

[aaronsk]

@Vernon this link may be of interest.

https://beggarsallreformation.blogspot.com/2009/07/luther-i-have-so-much-to-do-that-i.html?m=1

 

[Vernon]

@Vernon this link may be of interest.

https://beggarsallreformation.blogspot.com/2009/07/luther-i-have-so-much-to-do-that-i.html?m=1

Aaron, I cannot thank you enough. I read the blog spot and most of its links. There is a lot of material there. What a surprise it was to read and get so much background. Over the years I’ve just filed that quote away mentally. It has helped guide me, and now I have a better grasp.

It does appear that Spurgeon may have given the quote the impetus that has made it so popular. Perhaps he generalized from his overall understanding of Luther. Whatever the case, I look forward to the day I can chat with Martin and Charles, to get full information.

I have a few more things I hope to say later that will be more on point to Santiago. My apologies if I led the thread astray.

 

[Vernon]

. . . Can you please give me some advice to pray for the glory of God? . . .

George Whitefield leaves information in his journals about how he prayed, during his years at Oxford. It becomes clear that it was this prayer practice, among other things, that helped him advance out of the pragmatic way of salvation by works that was current with the Holiness Club, to the doctrines of grace that he came to preach with such great fervor.

Whitefield, in the early hours before classes, would read a passage of scripture and pray over it, asking God’s direction. He would then read that same passage of scripture in the Hebrew or Greek, and again ask God’s direction. From this, his prayer time became more generalized, seeking how God’s will might intersect what he had read.

This was apparently his practice during late teens and early twenties at Pembroke College, which was part of the university. It helps explain how he came to such radical differences with the Wesleys in their schemes of works / personal holiness based salvation. It also helps explain how his powerful preaching came to be so effectively filled with the doctrines of grace.

I personally find that by uniting my prayer time with the reading of the Holy Word, grace and growth are more readily imparted.

 

[Morgan]

Thanks everyone for the info on prayer. It seems many of us are thinking similar to one another.