How You Respond When You're Sinned Against?

[Ryan&Amber2013]

I would say this specifically refers to interacting with non-Christians, primarily the work place. When someone treats you unfairly, sins against you, is impatient with you, etc., do you find it best to 1. Not say anything at all and pretend all is well. 2. Not say anything but communicate through a changed attitude that something is wrong. 3. Confront every instance in a godly way to communicate the wrongs being done, knowing it may lead to a change of job?

Thanks for the wisdom!

 

[Jonathan95]

Usually I pull the person aside, give an explanation of my own behavior, ask what type of behavior they are looking for instead, etc.

Depends on the context of course. Depends on the job. Depends on who it was. Everything just depends lol.

 

[Alan D. Strange]

When it comes to the world, we are not to expect fair treatment or anything of the like. Thus we are to, if possible, "as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all."

What should condition our expectations, then, when dealing with the world, is that we don't expect them to treat us as brothers and sisters in the church should. It's great if they are fair in their treatment, and we may be in a place where we can speak to them if they are not and seek to bring about better conditions, if possible.

However, we should not anticipate or require such and should be willing to "turn the other cheek" and willingly suffer as necessary (I Peter as a whole). Our focus should not be on our own welfare but on the destiny of the ungodly if they continue in their sinful ways, part of which includes their mistreatment of us. This should induce us to pray for them and ask that the Lord would even use our kindness to them to convict them of sin so that he might have mercy on them (Rom. 12: 17-21).

Peace,
Alan

 

[Taylor]

It's great if they are fair in their treatment…However, we should not…require such…

Is this true? I suppose it depends on how you intend “require.” Perhaps you meant we should not demand fair treatment? As see it, unbelievers are required by God’s law to treat people fairly. When they don’t, I don’t see any reason why they cannot be called to account—to the glory of God and the good of their soul, of course, not for our own comfort or rights.

 

[Ryan&Amber2013]

That is kind of my thought. If I don't speak up, it seems that people just continue in their ways and justify themselves, and never change. I wonder if I made some things known, if that would bring about some sort of conviction and possibly lead to change.

Fairness and justice, are not limited to the church, right? Shouldn't they be expected of all humanity?

 

[Alan D. Strange]

@Taylor

I mean, Taylor, that we require proper behavior from our fellow Christians. We hold one another accountable for such. Church discipline may be engaged if it's not present.

We don't expect fair and kind treatment from our enemy, the world. Now, this is not to say that we may not go to law against the world if they've committed crimes against us. But this wasn't the question: it was about unfair treatment, not crimes.

And I think that I answered your possible objection by what you failed to cite from my answer:

It's great if they are fair in their treatment, and we may be in a place where we can speak to them if they are not and seek to bring about better conditions, if possible.

If we can deal with the world in their unfairnesses and unkindnesses in such a way that might ameliorate them, that's great, but we should not expect it or demand it. I am happy to amend that word if it perhaps clarifies things.

If they will not voluntarily rectify, however, and it's not a matter of invoking civil authority (we're not talking crime), and if some other due authority (the boss) will not call them to account (another possibility), then we are to suffer the wrong as Christians are called to do in places biblically too numerous to mention.

I certainly affirm that everyone is under God's law. I would have no problem with someone receiving unfair treatment telling an unbeliever that such wrong behavior is contrary to God's law and liable to judgment. But that's not ordinarily going to rectify the situation, given unbelief. And if done in a way that's throwing pearls before swine or simply in your face, that's not living as peaceably as possible.

Better when the offending party is unreceptive to any such admonitions, as they typically are, not to repay evil for evil and to allow the one to whom vengeance belongs to use that to bring about the conviction that only he can so that your good works become as coals upon the head of the evildoer.

Peace,
Alan

 

[Alan D. Strange]

Fairness and justice, are not limited to the church, right? Shouldn't they be expected of all humanity?

Fairness and justice are required of everyone by the law of God.

The civil magistrate enforces this in a measure and others in authority (parents, teachers, bosses, etc.) do as well.

However, humanity in its fallen condition does not act this way nor should we expect it; otherwise, what our Lord says in the Sermon on the Mount--in which he describes kingdom life in a fallen world--makes little sense. While due authorities properly call to account, we as Christians must be prepared to suffer injustices. The SOM is applied then to oneself--I speak up for others being shown injustices, but if I can't rectify such for myself, and others will not, I do not lash out, but suffer for righteousness' sake.

Peace,
Alan

 

[JimmyH]

In my late 20s, a confirmed unbeliever, I was sent out of the ironworker's union hall with three other men on a job of a few weeks duration. One of the men was about my age, and a Pentecostal minister with a congregation he presided over on each Lord's Day.

So I was in the habit of using the Lord's name as an exclamation, or as an expletive if I was aggravated. My Pentecostal co-worker finally said to me, "Call someone you know."

I asked him what he meant and he told me if I need help it does no good to call someone I don't know, and he went on to say it was hurtful to him, my co-worker, whenever I took the Lord's name in vain.

So I pondered this and lo and behold I stopped doing it. Some years later, having come to a saving knowledge I had a couple of occasions to say to others I worked with .. "Call someone you know."

Not sure if this is at all helpful, but the only experience I have with a work place situation ... and in that case, I was the unbeliever.

 

[RaderSDG00]

That is kind of my thought. If I don't speak up, it seems that people just continue in their ways and justify themselves, and never change. I wonder if I made some things known, if that would bring about some sort of conviction and possibly lead to change.

Fairness and justice, are not limited to the church, right? Shouldn't they be expected of all humanity?

This is my exact situation. Confrontation has always made it worse, however peaceably I have attempted it. It hardens them in their injustice and even aggravates it. The law of of God, without the Spirit of God, will only ever produce such a result. You suffer injustice, or you confront them about it and suffer even more. In my case, to them it is justified because all the grievous work gets thrown onto the lowest man on the totem poll. They reason, it was done to them, therefore they will do it to others. Just be careful that when you try to correct them, that you do not become pharisaical. Nothing hurts our witness more than that sort of hypocrisy. Keep in mind your own sinfulness when dealing with the sins of others or it will quickly lead to this.

 

[Ryan&Amber2013]

Fairness and justice are required of everyone by the law of God.

The civil magistrate enforces this in a measure and others in authority (parents, teachers, bosses, etc.) do as well.

However, humanity in its fallen condition does not act this way nor should we expect it; otherwise, what our Lord says in the Sermon on the Mount--in which he describes kingdom life in a fallen world--makes little sense. While due authorities properly call to account, we as Christians must be prepared to suffer injustices. The SOM is applied then to oneself--I speak up for others being shown injustices, but if I can't rectify such for myself, and others will not, I do not lash out, but suffer for righteousness' sake.

Peace,
Alan

Thanks for the wisdom!

 

[Ryan&Amber2013]

This is my exact situation. Confrontation has always made it worse, however peaceably I have attempted it. It hardens them in their injustice and even aggravates it. The law of of God, without the Spirit of God, will only ever produce such a result. You suffer injustice, or you confront them about it and suffer even more. In my case, to them it is justified because all the grievous work gets thrown onto the lowest man on the totem poll. They reason, it was done to them, therefore they will do it to others. Just be careful that when you try to correct them, that you do not become pharisaical. Nothing hurts our witness more than that sort of hypocrisy. Keep in mind your own sinfulness when dealing with the sins of others or it will quickly lead to this.

Thanks so much!

 

[Miss Marple]

I might say that enabling abuse at the work place by indulging it is not loving your neighbor as yourself.

It takes wisdom and discernment. It is a glory to a man to overlook an offense. And we are to turn the other cheek.

But it seems to me it gets to a point - if someone is yelling expletives at me for instance or keying my car - yes I will object. I am part of keeping the workplace safe and efficient.

 

[Taylor]

@Taylor

I mean, Taylor, that we require proper behavior from our fellow Christians. We hold one another accountable for such. Church discipline may be engaged if it's not present.

We don't expect fair and kind treatment from our enemy, the world. Now, this is not to say that we may not go to law against the world if they've committed crimes against us. But this wasn't the question: it was about unfair treatment, not crimes.

And I think that I answered your possible objection by what you failed to cite from my answer:


If we can deal with the world in their unfairnesses and unkindnesses in such a way that might ameliorate them, that's great, but we should not expect it or demand it. I am happy to amend that word if it perhaps clarifies things.

If they will not voluntarily rectify, however, and it's not a matter of invoking civil authority (we're not talking crime), and if some other due authority (the boss) will not call them to account (another possibility), then we are to suffer the wrong as Christians are called to do in places biblically too numerous to mention.

I certainly affirm that everyone is under God's law. I would have no problem with someone receiving unfair treatment telling an unbeliever that such wrong behavior is contrary to God's law and liable to judgment. But that's not ordinarily going to rectify the situation, given unbelief. And if done in a way that's throwing pearls before swine or simply in your face, that's not living as peaceably as possible.

Better when the offending party is unreceptive to any such admonitions, as they typically are, not to repay evil for evil and to allow the one to whom vengeance belongs to use that to bring about the conviction that only he can so that your good works become as coals upon the head of the evildoer.

Peace,
Alan

Thanks for the clarification.