Is it sinful to have outward preferences while looking for a spouse?

[Andrew35]

Also, the meme showed a woman’s cleavage, which is unacceptable for a Christian’s eyes to view, even if it is just a meme.

I'd be interested in hearing you support that. I have Muslim friends who believe it is unacceptable for any but her husband to view a woman's upper arms, ankles, or hair. How would you argue with them? Would you?

 

[cameronpickett]

I'd be interested in hearing you support that. I have Muslim friends who believe it is unacceptable for any but her husband to view a woman's upper arms, ankles, or hair. How would you argue with them? Would you?

I’m not sure where you’re going with that response?

I’ll respond in part with a quote from Paul Washer and his wife, “If your clothing is a frame for your face, from which the glory of God is to shine, it’s proper.”, “If it draws attention to your face. If your clothing draws attention to your body, to outline it, to make it noticed, then it’s sensual.”

Brother, you know that Christian men are to guard their eyes against all forms of lust and we have a duty to protect each other from stumbling. You know that cleavage is unacceptable and sensual.

 

[Andrew35]

Brother, you know that Christian men are to guard their eyes against all forms of lust and we have a duty to protect each other from stumbling. You know that cleavage is unacceptable and sensual.

No, I don't. In fact, I think it's something natural and good. (Having it, not showing it. But though I know what you mean, your response is suggestively ambiguous.)

If you are referring to our response as men to it, well, that's a different issue, and one that's largely culturally conditioned.

If I'm a doctor, for example, I'll have to adjust. If I live in a society where showing cleavage is the norm--such as in much of Europe prior to the Victorian era--that's also something I'll have to get used to. Just as my Muslim friends have to learn self control when they see an attractive ankle.

I'm not saying your principles are wrong; just that you have to be careful about making them universal. Other societies and peoples have had much stricter rules on modesty than even our most Puritan Puritan here. It takes some cultural and historical myopia to assume that our way is the right way.

 

[Ed Walsh]

Friends, I intend this question

I choose to answer your initial question and title of this thread.

Is it sinful to have outward preferences while looking for a spouse?​

I think my best answer would be rephrasing of your question.

Is it sinful not to look for preferences you may have in mind?

But remember, that is if you remember the old 45s from the 50s, remember that they have also all had a flip side. So will your most perfect wife and child and certainly yourself often betray you thusly.