Loss and Gain in the Christian Life - A Poem by John Newton

[Ed Walsh]

Greetings beloved of the Lord,

[my introduction to the poem]
Throughout my whole life of 69 years, the Lord has taken away many things. Many even of His good gifts has he taken back from me. Now I have entered the phase where "desire shall fail," and I am getting nearer to my "long home." (Ecclesiastes 12:5)

I don't talk very much about this apparent downside to Christian life. Paul said it best when he said, "If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable." (1 Corinthians 15:19)

But wonder of wonders I have of late received many times over much more than I lost. I have only lost that which I could not keep and gained that which I can never lose. God Himself. This is wonderful hope for all Christians. "For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day." (2 Corinthians 4:16)

But, and here's the rub. This give and take and give again does not usually happen simultaneously. Much of my gain had to wait sometimes 10, sometimes up to 40 years.
=======
Why does God blindside us at times? Because the only way we'll listen is the hard way.
He would rather lead us gently beside still waters. But he will not settle for a polite religious unreality with us.

I asked the Lord that I might grow in faith and love and every grace,​

Might more of his salvation know and seek more earnestly his face.​

​

Twas he who taught me thus to pray and he, I trust, has answered prayer;​

but it has been in such a way as almost drove me to despair.​

​

I hoped that in some favored hour at once he'd answer my request,​

And by his love's constraining power subdue my sins and give me rest.​

​

Instead of this he made me feel the hidden evils of my heart,​

And let the angry powers of hell assault my soul in every part.​

​

Yea more, with his own hand he seemed intent to aggravate my woe,​

Crossed all the fair designs I schemed, blasted my gourds, and laid me low.​

​

Lord, why is this, I trembling cried, wilt thou pursue thy worm to death?​

Tis in this way, the Lord replied, I answer prayer for grace and faith.​

​

These inward trials I employ from self and pride to set thee free,​

And break thy schemes of earthly joy, that thou mayest seek thy all in me.​

The Works of John Newton (Edinburgh: Banner of Truth Trust, 1988 reprint), III:607, 608.
Quoted in - "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you" (1 Peter 5:6).

Ortlund, R. C., Jr., & Hughes, R. K. (2005). Isaiah: God saves sinners (p. 108). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

 

[KMK]

Amen, Brother. Thanks for this.

 

[dhh712]

Thank you for sharing this, Ed; it is such a beautiful poem. I remember a pastor talking about John Newton in a sermon once about how he had lost his wife early or so and it was a very heavy trial for him; I had thought some time to try to find a biography about his life.

His poem reminds me of a favourite Catholic hymn of mine, "Holy Darkness"; one of the verses which I love,

"I have taught you the price of compassion, you have stood before the grave. Though my love can seem like a raging storm, this is the love that saves."

We can't understand why God puts us through such hardships; it seems to us like he hates us rather than loves us. As a human with limited perception we can only understand that if God loves me, then he should continue to give me the things that I love and which makes me happy--why in the world would he take away my spouse? We're happy and have a beautiful marriage and the Lord brought him/her to me in the first place? We can only come by our own understanding that God is angry with us and is punishing us in some way. That is why we must trust in him and lean not upon our own understanding--trusting in the promises in his word that he works all things, everything that happens to us in life, to good to those who love him and are called according to his purpose.