Protecting Our Eyes

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Ryan&Amber2013

Puritan Board Senior
In order to protect our eyes and hearts, my wife and I always look away or change the show when someone is on screen improperly dressed or missing clothing. For example, if a woman is wearing a form-fitting low-cut dress, I don't want to see that junk, so I'll turn it off. Or if a man is not wearing a shirt, my wife will either look away or turn off the show. We do this to respect each other and keep our marriage pure.

The strange thing, though, is that I don't really know anyone who practices the same. Most Christians I know seem to watch stuff that I know has sexual content and inappropriate stuff, and clearly don't share the same values as us. It's always been odd. Like if we go to the beach with friends, the women might wear only their underwear (swim suit), or the guys will be shirtless. We don't want those images in our mind.

I thought this stuff was common sense and easy to understand. Some people might say "well that's our freedom." But obviously the stats show that most men seem to have a problem with p0rnography, so I don't trust their idea of freedom.

Anyway, sorry if this venting comes across as judgemental. I just don't know what I'm missing.
 
Sadly, our culture has severely desensitized Christian men and women in this area. It has become all too normal of a thing.
 
Nothing really novel about that. I am conscious of where my eyes go. Job's comment in 31:1 is applicable to any era.

"I have made a covenant with my eyes; Why then should I look upon a young woman? (Job 31:1 NKJ)

But, I rarely watch movies, don't watch TV, and limit online videos to various educational materials. I have zero problem going to the beach, though. I own and control my eyes. I don't feel the need to retreat from the world.

Temptation? Of course. As much temptation as any other real-life interactions with others in our walk. May God grant us help and strength.
 
Sadly, our culture has severely desensitized Christian men and women in this area. It has become all too normal of a thing.
Yeah for sure. I just thought stuff like this would be Christianity 101. Sexual sin and temptation is ravaging the lives of believers in so many obvious ways. I guess I thought we would all be more aware and careful with it. It seems like the previous generations had a better grasp on it.
 
I thought this stuff was common sense and easy to understand. Some people might say "well that's our freedom." But obviously the stats show that most men seem to have a problem with p0rnography, so I don't trust their idea of freedom.

Anyway, sorry if this venting comes across as judgemental. I just don't know what I'm missing.

You are not missing anything here, Ryan. Instead, you just have a basic grasp of seventh commandment sins and duties.
 
"In order to protect our eyes and hearts, my wife and I always look away or change the show when someone is on screen improperly dressed or missing clothing. For example, if a woman is wearing a form-fitting low-cut dress, I don't want to see that junk, so I'll turn it off. Or if a man is not wearing a shirt, my wife will either look away or turn off the show. We do this to respect each other and keep our marriage pure."

Much easier to just not watch tv. Find other things to do. Curate a collection of decent movies/dvd player you can watch as a treat now and then, if you can't get rid of it all together.
It's pretty shocking, as a non-tv viewer, to go into some space with a tv blaring. I don't know how people can bear it. :whatswrong:

As for the beach, it seems to me a different animal. You are not sitting there captive. You can get up, walk around (and away from) anything objectionable. You are not in control, as you are when you turn on the tv. If going to the beach causes you to stumble, don't go.

The principle is simple: don't do things (watching tv) or go places (beach) if you have to constantly guard your eyes. That sort of takes the 'relax' out of relaxation.
 
I don’t even like going to theme parks and county fairs in the hotter weather months. It’s like a contest these days of how much skin you can get away with showing.
 
I'm thinking of another issue. I can control my own eyes and heart, but I have two sons who don't have such spiritual maturity yet, and I don't want to expose them to things that can affect their purity. They don't think sexually yet, but seeing women in their underwear and even thongs just isn't good for their little minds. It's tough. Maybe I hear the great Smokies calling in the future.
 
I'm thinking of another issue. I can control my own eyes and heart, but I have two sons who don't have such spiritual maturity yet, and I don't want to expose them to things that can affect their purity. They don't think sexually yet, but seeing women in their underwear and even thongs just isn't good for their little minds. It's tough. Maybe I hear the great Smokies calling in the future.
You cannot possibly remove them from the world, therefore you must teach them by precept and example how to live righteously IN the world. They will learn from you how to guard their eyes and their thoughts, if you tell them how and follow up by doing what you teach. I find it best to NOT make a drama about the magazine covers in grocery aisles nor about swimwear at the beach. I simply deal, and my children see me keeping my eyes and my heart, descending (I hope) neither into excessive, crippling prudishness, nor into lasciviousness. They know that we avoid certain movies and shows (well, we have no TV); we don't go certain places; we don't do certain things--but we still shop and swim and travel and seek to live the Gospel in front of others, who regardless of their morals or standards of decency need to be shown Christian charity.
 
In order to protect our eyes and hearts, my wife and I always look away or change the show when someone is on screen improperly dressed or missing clothing. For example, if a woman is wearing a form-fitting low-cut dress, I don't want to see that junk, so I'll turn it off. Or if a man is not wearing a shirt, my wife will either look away or turn off the show. We do this to respect each other and keep our marriage pure.

The strange thing, though, is that I don't really know anyone who practices the same. Most Christians I know seem to watch stuff that I know has sexual content and inappropriate stuff, and clearly don't share the same values as us. It's always been odd. Like if we go to the beach with friends, the women might wear only their underwear (swim suit), or the guys will be shirtless. We don't want those images in our mind.

I thought this stuff was common sense and easy to understand. Some people might say "well that's our freedom." But obviously the stats show that most men seem to have a problem with p0rnography, so I don't trust their idea of freedom.

Anyway, sorry if this venting comes across as judgemental. I just don't know what I'm missing.
Brother, You are not alone in this. It is a battle. I have made a covenant with my eyes and I do control them and look the other way or down or wherever I need to to avert my gaze. However, sometimes in some places it does not matter in which direction you look. I try to avoid those places. That is the part that is so disappointing. I live on the Gulf Coast and we spent all of our free time at the beach growing up. I loved swimming and surfing, the waves and the sand. All of it. But now I hardly go because at a crowded beach there is hardly a safe place to rest your eyes.

As a man I feel like it is disingenuous for other men to pretend like this is not a problem. Are we really all so very high minded and should we act as if we are so spiritual that it doesn't matter if women are walking around in their underwear, thongs, etc. and it is perfectly fine and that we should simply control our eyes rather than remove ourselves from the situation?

In the words of that famous theologian from Delaware, "Come on man!"
 
Not too sound too pure for words but I basically don't watch any tv any more. Some documentaries online. I listen to stories online and podcasts and such. I read; I read and do some watching on the internet. TV has lost me.

The issues you mention, the insane pushing of the most extreme forms of sin. It just doesn't entertain me, it seems. I like leisure and I do a lot of "listening" and reading. Just not "watching."
 
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