Riddles and one-liners

Discussion in 'Entertainment and Humor' started by Theognome, Feb 21, 2009.

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  1. Theognome

    Theognome Burrito Bill

    Let's post some of our favorite 'quick grin' lines. Here's a few to start with...

    What do you call a row of rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line.

    What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.

    Why do mermaids wear sea shells? The b shells are too small.

    Why did the bicycle not make it across the road? It was two tired.

    ...And so on, and so on.

  2. Rich Koster

    Rich Koster Puritan Board Post-Graduate

    Why don't Arminians eat at White Castle?

    They are afraid of back Slyders.
  3. Knoxienne

    Knoxienne Puritan Board Graduate

    How do we know that according to the Bible, it's men and not women who are supposed to make the coffee?

    He-brews. :coffee:
  4. BG

    BG Puritan Board Junior

    Here is another one...


    Do you know what the only thing worse than a male chauvinist pig is?
    A Woman who will not do what she is told.:lol:

    My wife cracks up every time I tell this to people, especially when there are women present. Oh the look on their faces!!! My wife is used to my weird sense of humor and knows I do not mean any harm by it.

    How about these husband quotes, my wife likes these too...

    I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

    Marriage is a 3-ring circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

    The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"

    Why do men die before their wives? They want to.

    A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said "I haven't eaten anything in four days." She looked at him and said, "I wish I had your will power."

    Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.

    The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

    First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
    Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

    How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry done for free.

    Do you know Adam and Eve had the perfect marriage?
    She never had to listen to him talk about how good his mother's cooking was and he never had to listen to her talk about all the men she could have married.

    Funniest open line to a sermon that I have ever heard...
    I feel like a mosquito at a nudest colony, I know what to do, I just don't know where to begin.
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