Serving wine at wedding with potential alcoholic in attendance...

[burns]

Hello folks! There is a question which my wife and I have been discussing for years since a wedding in the family, and I would be interested in your insight. The event was a wedding in which one of the two families was against having a "cash bar" and the other was for said bar. The family that was set against the cash bar had considered Romans 14:13-19 as follows:

Do Not Cause Another to Stumble
13 Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother. 14 I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is unclean for anyone who thinks it unclean. 15 For if your brother is grieved by what you eat, you are no longer walking in love. By what you eat, do not destroy the one for whom Christ died. 16 So do not let what you regard as good be spoken of as evil.17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. 19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

...and determined that there should be no alcohol at the wedding, because it was possible that a relative would be in attendance who was said to be an alcoholic. According to family members, he had claimed to completely abstain from alcohol for a period of many years, but the family did not want to put a "stumbling block" in his way, following their interpretation of the passage above.

Do you folks care to share any thoughts on the above passage from Romans 14 sheds light on the situation, or how it doesn't apply in this particular way? We have our own (differing) ideas on the matter, but we are interested in any insight you have to provide.

Thanks,
Mike

 

[TylerRay]

What did the former alcoholic have to say about it?

 

[KMK]

As a whole, Romans 14 is not addressing the use of wine at a modern American wedding reception. (I am assuming it is the reception.) It would be unwise to make your choice based on such oblique references.

I agree with Tyler. Ask the man in question what he prefers. If no one else cares one way or the other, then you have your answer.

 

[KeithW]

If you have never talked with a recovering alcoholic then I recommend it.

I have an old high school buddy who at one point in time I had not seen for 10 years. During that time he had become an alcoholic, his family did an intervention, and ever since he has been in a 12 step program (AA). People in programs have to talk about the condition they are in to each other to make progress. For example, my friend does not like to eat at a pub because of the temptation of that environment. So either talk to that person or find a local AA or 12 step meeting and ask. Anything else is second guessing.