Looks like it's time for the Smiths to be told by the Session (lovingly) to either fish or cut bait.
BUT...
Perhaps the Smiths don't believe in church membership. Surely this is not enough to deny them communion is it? The church that would do this could be charged with being manipulative.
No, I wouldn't necessarily that's enough to deny someone communion, but I do have a real problem with people saying that they don't "believe in church membership" in the face of overwhelming evidence that even the early church had
some sort of mechanism for knowing who was and was not among their ranks. Membership is just our way of doing that. Every time I've spoken to someone who "doesn't believe in membership", it's because they've been burned by a church in the past and don't want to deal with that responsibility again. (Much like someone who, after a messy divorce, dates and sleeps around, even shacks up, but refuses to marry again.) Folks like that need to be lovingly given a hearing as to their past hurts from other churches, counseled as to their error regarding membership, and encouraged to join. If they still refuse, I'm not saying that they should be denied communion necessarily, but they should understand that they're part of a church that DOES believe in membership, and that there are some privileges that they just won't get without it (such as leadership, voting, etc).
Seems to me that it's not a function of time only, but of involvement. For instance, take two families who've been consistently attending a church for the exact same amount of time. One only shows up on Sundays and hasn't formed many relationships with folks in the church. The other has become involved in a number of the church's ministries, has friendships out the wazoo, etc. I'd say that both families should be approached about membership eventually, but I'd make the latter a priority. They're already functioning as members for all intents and purposes, anyway.
Looks like it's time for the Smiths to be told by the Session (lovingly) to either fish or cut bait.
Rae, can you elaborate a little more on this? Do you mean that if the "Smiths" deny membership they should be pressed into membership and or should be refused the Lord's Supper. What I'm trying to understand should a session actively refuse the Lord's Supper to folks who for all intents and purposes are not a member in any church but are long term visitors to the local body. Long term I mean that they are professing Christians by consistent fellowship on the Lord's day and display fruits of believing. However, there is no formal submission to the local session and no formal acknowledgement of belief before the session.
Sorry, I answered the question thinking about membership in general, not about how it related to the Lord's Supper.