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Originally posted by OS_X
Hank Hanegraaf: The chicken's reasons for crossing the road can be most easily remembered using the acronym C.R.O.S.S., which points to the fact that the chicken made a free will decision to come to faith in Christ. I go into this in greater detail in my book 'Chickianity in Crisis', which documents the fakes, farces and fallacies of the entire chicken growth movement.
This was great!Originally posted by puritancovenanter
Originally posted by OS_X
Hank Hanegraaf: The chicken's reasons for crossing the road can be most easily remembered using the acronym C.R.O.S.S., which points to the fact that the chicken made a free will decision to come to faith in Christ. I go into this in greater detail in my book 'Chickianity in Crisis', which documents the fakes, farces and fallacies of the entire chicken growth movement.
Originally posted by Peter
Great thread Kerry.
Arminian; Now that chicken will have to perservere or it may find itself on the original side of the road again!
Jehovah`s witness chicken - to be one of the 144,000 chickens
The above is genius HAHAHAHHAHEHEHEHALOL Ross Perot's voice is ringing in my ears saying the above HAHHHEHEHAOriginally posted by alwaysreforming
Ross Perot: Now, see, now that just sticks in my craw! You've got a bunch of PB'ers sittin around talkin about a chicken! You've got 37 replies from otherwise intelligent people and all they can talk about is a chicken! Well, it really is just that simple! A chicken without trade restrictions is free to open up a whole new exchange of corn for eggs! Can I finish?! Can I finish!? Can I finish?! Can I finish?!!!
Originally posted by turmeric
Bill Clinton; It all depends on what you mean by "chicken" "cross" and "road".
:bigsmile: you should have added, " and tune in tonight on pay per view, only $49.95 to see the chicken cross the roadOriginally posted by poimen
Don King: The chicken had the multitude of infinitude in all Republican righteousness to pursue the punctiliaristic purchasing of a higher life!
Originally posted by Slippery
The above is genius HAHAHAHHAHEHEHEHALOL Ross Perot's voice is ringing in my ears saying the above HAHHHEHEHAOriginally posted by alwaysreforming
Ross Perot: Now, see, now that just sticks in my craw! You've got a bunch of PB'ers sittin around talkin about a chicken! You've got 37 replies from otherwise intelligent people and all they can talk about is a chicken! Well, it really is just that simple! A chicken without trade restrictions is free to open up a whole new exchange of corn for eggs! Can I finish?! Can I finish!? Can I finish?! Can I finish?!!!
you can't be serious hehehehe. Don King is a boxing promoter known for his outlandish verbose statements, lawsuits, eccentric personality and vindictive business dealings.Originally posted by turmeric
Who is Don King?
When a certain shameless fellow mockingly asked a pious old man what God had done before the creation of the world, the latter aptly countered that he had been building hell for the curious.
September 10th, 1945 finds a strapping (but tender) five and a half month old Wyandotte rooster pecking through the dust of Fruita, Colorado. The unsuspecting bird had never looked so delicious as he did that, now famous, day. Clara Olsen was planning on featuring the plump chicken in the evening meal. Husband Lloyd Olsen was sent out, on a very routine mission, to prepare the designated fryer for the pan. Nothing about this task turned out to be routine. Lloyd knew his Mother in Law would be dining with them and would savor the neck. He positioned his ax precisely, estimating just the right tolerances, to leave a generous neck bone. "It was as important to Suck-Up to your Mother in Law in the 40's as it is today." A skillful blow was executed and the chicken staggered around like most freshly terminated poultry.
Then the determined bird shook off the traumatic event and never looked back. Mike (it is unclear when the famous rooster took on the name) returned to his job of being a chicken. He pecked for food and preened his feathers just like the rest of his barnyard buddies.
When Olsen found Mike the next morning, sleeping with his "head" under his wing, he decided that if Mike had that much will to live, he would figure out a way to feed and water him. With an eyedropper Mike was given grain and water. It was becoming obvious that Mike was special. A week into Mike's new life Olsen packed him up and took him 250 miles to the University of Utah in Salt Lake City . The skeptical scientists were eager to answer all the questions regarding Mike's amazing ability to survive with no head. It was determined that ax blade had missed the jugular vein and a clot had prevented Mike from bleeding to death. Although most of his head was in a jar, most of his brain stem and one ear was left on his body. Since most of a chicken's reflex actions are controlled by the brain stem Mike was able to remain quite healthy.
In the 18 MONTHS that Mike lived as "The Headless Wonder Chicken" he grew from a mere 2 1/2 lbs. to nearly 8 lbs. In a Gayle Meyer interview Olsen said Mike was a "robust chicken - a fine specimen of a chicken except for not having a head." Some longtime Fruita residents, gathered at the Monument Cafe for coffee, also remember Mike - "he was a big fat chicken who didn't know he didn't have a head" - "he seemed as happy as any other chicken." Mike's excellent state of health made it difficult for animal-rights activists to garner much of a following. Even now the town of Fruita celebrates Mike's impressive will to live, not the nature of his handicap. Miracle Mike took on a manager, and with the Olsens in tow, set out on a national tour. Curious sideshow patrons in New York , Atlantic City , Los Angeles , and San Diego lined up to pay 25 cents to see Mike. The "Wonder Chicken" was valued at $10,000.00 and insured for the same. His fame and fortune would earn him recognition in Life and Time Magazines. It goes without saying there was a Guinness World Record in all this. While returning from one of these road trips the Olsens stopped at a motel in the Arizona desert. In the middle of the night Mike began to choke. Unable to find the eyedropper used to clear Mike's open esophagus Miracle Mike passed on.
Originally posted by Mudandstars
ESPN College Gameday announcers: Well, we're not entirely sure, but I'm sure there's something about this scenario that will serve as a segue into us talking about USC and Notre Dame, to the exclusion of every other team, state, and topic, for the rest of the show.
Originally posted by Mudandstars
Ozzy Osbourne: Uh-uh-h, n-hun, na na, Sharon, S-s-sharon, uh, u-u-u-u-uh, mmmmm, ma na , chicken, uh, Sharon, ma-na-u-ma-mu-nah, uhhhhhh, uh, chicken."
Originally posted by WrittenFromUtopia
Originally posted by Mudandstars
ESPN College Gameday announcers: Well, we're not entirely sure, but I'm sure there's something about this scenario that will serve as a segue into us talking about USC and Notre Dame, to the exclusion of every other team, state, and topic, for the rest of the show.
Is there anything more important this year in College Football history than the outcome of this game? No.