Congratulations to you all! Being married (to my very best friend in the world) is the most fun and rewarding experience I've ever had.
We got married a year and a half ago, and I planned the whole thing with the help of my momma (and Jeff, of course!). I'm not sure if there is much information on Reformed wedding planning - though, for our ceremony we used the vows from the Westminster Directory for Public Worship, didn't serve the Lord's supper, sang a psalm, etc. We also looked through a book of wedding liturgies with our pastor & chose one that we all liked (we were his first wedding).
I agree with Gloria - you can't please everyone (nor should you try), and less is more. I much prefer simple & elegant to an affair that looks like the couple is trying waaaaay too hard to put on the "right" kind of show. When you look back on it, you should have great memories of your family, friends, and spouse - so it's important to plan well and stay relaxed. The focus of the day is making your vows before God & His people and entering into your own earthly picture of Christ & His church.
Definitely nail down your ceremony & reception sites ASAP. I planned my wedding in 6 months (our church does not own its own building & rents from 7th Day Adventists) and was up against girls who had been planning a year or more. We got a great church & reception site because other couples canceled.
There are a lot of creative ways to stretch a budget, if that's what you're after, too. Our photographer cost 25% of the usual price because he offered a digital package. He turned over to us 2 CDs of all our wedding pictures and the copyrights to them as well (so we can have as many printed at Walgreen's or Sam's as we like!). No fancy albums for the coffee table, but we can watch our pictures as a slideshow on our TV
and were able to e-mail them out to all our friends and family.
My girlfriends and I made our bouquets 2 months ahead of time. I waited for high-quality silk flowers (I'm all sneezy around the real ones) to go on sale & then we had a Girls Night of flower-making & Jane Austen-watching. Not only wasn't I allergic to them on my wedding day, but I didn't have to worry about special ordering magnolias out of season only to watch them wilt in the June heat. They were later used as centerpieces for the wedding party & family tables at the reception. Jeff and I had student violinists play at our ceremony for a very low fee & then DJ'd our ceremony ourselves via our pre-made mix of swing/big-band songs played quietly through the sound system.
Lots of internet sites offer do-it-yourself ideas for favors, programs, invitations, etc. In fact, I ordered most of my supplies & decorations online from wholesalers or from parts of the country where there is more supply than demand & prices are lower.
I even had a friend who purchased one of those fake cardboard cakes that bakeries use in their display windows - it was
fab-u-lous! In the kitchen was hidden the Sam's sheet cake she served! She had a picture perfect cake which fed 300 people for $75
