RamistThomist
Puritanboard Assessor
Classified ads
The following were actually taken from classified newspaper ads:
Free Yorkshire Terrier: Eight years old. Hateful little dog.
Free puppies: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 Sneaky neighbour's dog
Free puppies: Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog
Found: Dirty white dog. Looks like a rat... been out awhile... better be reward.
One-man, seven-woman hot tub - $850/offer
Snowblower for sale. Only used on snowy days.
Two wire mesh butchering gloves: One five-finger, one three-finger, pair: $15
Tickle-me Elmo (still in box). Comes with its own 1988 Mustang, 5L, auto, excellent condition $6,800
Cows for sale. Never bred calves. Also one gay bull for sale.
Full-sized mattress. 20 yr. warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell.
Nordic track $300 Hardly used. call Chubby.
Bill's septic cleaning 'We haul American-made products'
Hummels - largest selection ever 'If it's in stock, we have it!
Georgia peaches: California grown - 89 cents/lb.
Nice parachute: Never opened - used once
Tired of working for only $9.75 per hour? We offer profit sharing and flexible hours. Starting pay: $7 - $9 per hour.
Exercise equipment: Queen size mattress & box springs - $175
Our sofa will seat the whole mob. 100% Italian leather.
Body shapers toning salon - Free coffee & donuts
And now for the best of the lot:
For sale by owner:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 negotiable. No longer needed. Recently married; wife knows everything.
The following were actually taken from classified newspaper ads:
Free Yorkshire Terrier: Eight years old. Hateful little dog.
Free puppies: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 Sneaky neighbour's dog
Free puppies: Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog
Found: Dirty white dog. Looks like a rat... been out awhile... better be reward.
One-man, seven-woman hot tub - $850/offer
Snowblower for sale. Only used on snowy days.
Two wire mesh butchering gloves: One five-finger, one three-finger, pair: $15
Tickle-me Elmo (still in box). Comes with its own 1988 Mustang, 5L, auto, excellent condition $6,800
Cows for sale. Never bred calves. Also one gay bull for sale.
Full-sized mattress. 20 yr. warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell.
Nordic track $300 Hardly used. call Chubby.
Bill's septic cleaning 'We haul American-made products'
Hummels - largest selection ever 'If it's in stock, we have it!
Georgia peaches: California grown - 89 cents/lb.
Nice parachute: Never opened - used once
Tired of working for only $9.75 per hour? We offer profit sharing and flexible hours. Starting pay: $7 - $9 per hour.
Exercise equipment: Queen size mattress & box springs - $175
Our sofa will seat the whole mob. 100% Italian leather.
Body shapers toning salon - Free coffee & donuts
And now for the best of the lot:
For sale by owner:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 negotiable. No longer needed. Recently married; wife knows everything.
