Prayer

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EuphratesRiver

Puritan Board Freshman
Hello,

I am in need of prayer, more than I can express in a single post. I don't know how common it is for believers to experience an incredible fight with doubt, but it is feeling neck high, like I am trying to keep my head above water as someone who can't swim. While I am constantly battling these thoughts, I am worried at the same time about losing my stability in Christ. I am terrified with the thought of leaving the God I love, as a possible reprobate in disguise, and I see nothing better to live for apart from him. Christ is everything, and I want nothing but to have him fill all in all.

It was my great prayer for years to grow fervently in the faith, but it looks like I am near despair and I can't stop it. I am pleading night and day in prayer for help, and the weight seems to grow stronger, I don't even feel like eating or sleeping. Sometimes, it seems, the Lord does encourage me for a moment and then it goes. I come to read the Psalms and I am a little comforted, not much. I don't understand what is happening to me, I don't understand why I feel so close to losing everything, if indeed I am losing anything to begin with.

Please pray for me, I really need it.

BTW, I am not talking about doubtful thoughts of my salvation, it is secure if I am among the sheep.
 
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In addition to the Psalms, and prayer, read Romans 3,5 & 8. Also Ephesians 1, 2 and 6:10-18 especially. Praying for you.
 
I see nothing better to live for apart from him. Christ is everything, and I want nothing but to have him fill all in all.

Then you have the attitude of the disciples when Jesus asked them if they also would go away -- 'to who else should we go? You have the words of eternal life.'
Jesus will never cast you out. You wouldn't have these thoughts and desires if the Father had not drawn you to Him.

If the doubt is about the faith generally -- I draw a lot of help from the Old Testament predictions of Jesus and his work in detail many hundreds of years before his birth and how they are fulfilled in his ministry. Isaiah is a rich comfort here.

Maybe none of this comes close to what you are grappling with. Maybe there are medical issues you're struggling with here too (there have been for me in my fears and doubts). We are praying. Jesus and the Holy Spirit are praying too -- Romans 8, as Jimmy cited above.
 
Praying for you Bryan.

Feed your faith and starve your doubts by not neglecting daily Scripture study, rejoicing in hope, being patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer (Romans 12:12), fellowship with other believers, keeping good stewardship of the secular and spiritual gifts God has given you—including how and where your time is being spent—and with regular assembly with others to worship God, receive instruction, access the ordinary means of grace through word and sacrament, and be subject to discipline.
 
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