Good Advice?

[davejonescue]

"4. When one asked him concerning marriage, whether it were good to marry; seeing sometimes, when concupiscence pricked him, he was moved to it, and some other time when he felt no such thing, he thought he might abstain from it: He answered, many come hastily into that calling, not using the means of trying their estate thoroughly before; as namely, whether they by prayer, fasting, and avoiding all occasions of concupiscence, have the gift of chastity or no? Many use some of the means, and not all: many use all the means, but a small time: therefore it is good to use first the means, not part of them, but all of them: not for a while, but long. If so be that all these things will not prevail, attend upon the Lord's ordinance, and wait when the Lord shall give just occasion of using that estate, to his glory and our comfort."

--The Works of Richard Greenham

It seems today many forgo this advice and instead mainly preach "marry young." I have never heard this preached from a pulpit, that is to give oneself a specific time of "testing" to see if one is endowed with such a gift.

 

[Solparvus]

The creation account shows that marriage is the norm and singleness the exception. I think there's more argument that you must positively prove your call to be single than to marry.

 

[davejonescue]

The creation account shows that marriage is the norm and singleness the exception. I think there's more argument that you must positively prove your call to be single than to marry.

But then we come to the Gospels, where Jesus says "those that can accept it, should accept it." Wouldn't then the prerogative be to find out if you "can accept it?" Could it be that many forgo this "testing" in the fear that they can? And if they can, that Jesus then says they should.

It is interesting to think that in the NT, the Messiah was heralded by a single (JtB), in a book about a single (J), with the most books in it written by a single (P). That is quite the example.

Anyways, this wasn't really to cause controversy, I just wonder how many Pastors actually counsel the young in their care to consider this gift with soberness and severity? It seems the current stream is to almost propose it as an impossibility, and furthermore to shroud its possibility by the absence of its expressive viability as an equal and realistic calling. I have been a Christian for 18 years, and have yet to hear a single sermon on it; but couldnt count the times I have heard marriage mentioned with a scientific calculator.

 

[Solparvus]

But then we come to the Gospels, where Jesus says "those that can accept it, should accept it." Wouldn't then the prerogative be to find out if you "can accept it?" Could it be that many forgo this "testing" in the fear that they can? And if they can, that Jesus then says they should.

It is interesting to think that in the NT, the Messiah was heralded by a single (JtB), in a book about a single (J), with the most books in it written by a single (P). That is quite the example.

I've always taken "can accept it" in light of Mt. 19:10-11, where the disciples protest to the strict standard of marriage for life, no outs because she burned breakfast (the Pharisees allowed very great latitude in cause for divorce). It may be in the eunuch portion He is encouraging those to remain single who can. Though I've found one commentator who has a take similar in spirit to your comment.

My concern with the OP is this: Marriage is the norm, singleness the exception. Everyday life shows this. Why so much striving to prove that it is lawful for you to do what humanity was generally made to do? But then again, singles are of great service in the kingdom; and if one has the gift, they may engage in works that married persons cannot do. That may justify Greenham's advice. I want to think on that a little more.

Far as John the Baptist (if he indeed wasn't married), Jesus, and Paul, these men had extraordinary ministries. There are some labors with which marriage is completely inconsistent, and it takes a special calling to engage in them. For those gifted, it's a very honorable thing and they're greatly useful to the kingdom. Still, singleness is not normal.

 

[davejonescue]

I've always taken "can accept it" in light of Mt. 19:10-11, where the disciples protest to the strict standard of marriage for life, no outs because she burned breakfast (the Pharisees allowed very great latitude in cause for divorce). It may be in the eunuch portion He is encouraging those to remain single who can. Though I've found one commentator who has a take similar in spirit to your comment.

My concern with the OP is this: Marriage is the norm, singleness the exception. Everyday life shows this. Why so much striving to prove that it is lawful for you to do what humanity was generally made to do? But then again, singles are of great service in the kingdom; and if one has the gift, they may engage in works that married persons cannot do. That may justify Greenham's advice. I want to think on that a little more.

Far as John the Baptist (if he indeed wasn't married), Jesus, and Paul, these men had extraordinary ministries. There are some labors with which marriage is completely inconsistent, and it takes a special calling to engage in them. For those gifted, it's a very honorable thing and they're greatly useful to the kingdom. Still, singleness is not normal.

I agree. Unfortunately, I think Protestantism in its fear of being Papist-like has chosen singleness as one of its contra-positions. And as such abnormal has more leaned towards non-existent in many of its circles. I think we are quick to use endowment, singleness being a gift, as an excuse to assume our present, as a means to determine the if; forgetting that Paul also said "I have trained." (1 Cor. 9:27)