I Need A Cheap Pulpit Robe
- Thread starter KMK
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Marrow Man
Drunk with Powder
For a wedding I performed, I was in very similar shoes. A retired minister who was about the same size as I let me borrow his. Perhaps you can avail yourself of the same situation.
SolaScriptura
Puritanboard Brimstone
Maybe I'm just a jerk...
But seeing as how you don't already have one, this implies that you don't USE one in your normal duties.
Why not tell them this and let them know, "Hey, this is for YOU guys." And have them pay for it. I mean, they're willing to pay for everything else to have the "picture perfect wedding," so why shouldn't they pay for this?
What you say makes some sense but there are other factors involved:
1) They are 19 and 21 with minimum wage jobs...
2) Her parents are dead...
3) She is like a member of our family...
4) I figure I probably will need one from time to time so I might as well get one.
Good point! I actually do know a DA who is retiring this month!
SolaScriptura
Puritanboard Brimstone
I'm glad that you're trying to consider their wishes.
However, these circumstances don't change a thing for me. Everyone has a story. The bottom line is that they WANT you to wear a Geneva gown. They don't NEED you to do so. In fact, their wedding would be quite lovely without it. They want it for the sake of their aesthetic tastes. And I have a hard time understanding why you should be the one to pay for their aesthetic choices.
If you're wanting to give them a gift, then don't accept the honorarium.
Again, I'd ask them to pay for it just like they're paying for flowers, photography, and who knows what else.
LawrenceU
Puritan Board Doctor
I have to agree with Ben on this one. If you have tried to find one and haven't been able to do so, then if they are sold on the idea it is up to them to supply it. If it is normal for Baptist pastors in the area to use robes then they would be right to assume that you would have one. I'll be it is not the norm, however.
I can share with you a not-so-detailed experience.
When my wife and I were preparing for marriage, we wanted an "uber-traditional" marriage. I don't mean extravagant, but one rooted in history and Reformed theology. We did this affordably, but there were a couple of things we asked for that inconvenienced our pastor. I did not realize this at the time, I was excited to be married. He NEVER mentioned it, nor will he ever. But I realized it afterward.
I've always felt bad about that as I love the man, and his preaching blessed me immensely.
I think making a reasonable effort to accommodate them, especially since they're like family, is a wonderful thing to do. If you are unable to do this reasonably, I gaurantee you they will understand...they have min wage jobs, they know what financial difficulty is like. This will also present a great pastoral opportunity with them as their nuptials are a foretaste of the glory of the great Wedding Feast, not a kick-back to a time we all have great respect for.
When my wife and I were preparing for marriage, we wanted an "uber-traditional" marriage. I don't mean extravagant, but one rooted in history and Reformed theology. We did this affordably, but there were a couple of things we asked for that inconvenienced our pastor. I did not realize this at the time, I was excited to be married. He NEVER mentioned it, nor will he ever. But I realized it afterward.
I've always felt bad about that as I love the man, and his preaching blessed me immensely.
I think making a reasonable effort to accommodate them, especially since they're like family, is a wonderful thing to do. If you are unable to do this reasonably, I gaurantee you they will understand...they have min wage jobs, they know what financial difficulty is like. This will also present a great pastoral opportunity with them as their nuptials are a foretaste of the glory of the great Wedding Feast, not a kick-back to a time we all have great respect for.
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