I really dont know how viewing marriage as a preventative for sexual immorality, as the Bible describes it, became a invitation to sexual deviancy; or "anything goes," attitude because of it, that wasnt my intent; nor do I think it is the intent of scriptures. Nevertheless, scripture is plain that marriage is to be the preventative against fornication; and that we are to get married if we cannot practice self-control because of the rampant nature of sexual immorality 1 Cor. 7:2. Does this mean that either spouse will not be tempted towards lusts or adultery? No. But unlike the SSA, they do have an outlet to express their sexual desires when the time arises 1 Cor. 7:5 If this isnt enough to quell their desires, it is still a step ahead of those who do not have this option; otherwise they form a union void of authentic attraction.
After marriage, if it is within ones ability; I think loving ones spouse would entail remaining attractive for them; i.e. not letting oneself go. This would be in the realm of laying ones life down for them. In the cases of extreme accidents, then it wouldnt be a matter of question whether one spouse loved the other, since their goal to attract, or to look beautiful/handsome for them isnt neglected based on laziness, but inability. Unfortunately, some people do use marriage as an excuse to put on 100lbs, to no longer groom themselves properly, or simply have the attitude that the "prey is caught" no need for further effort to attract it. Does this stifle all possibilities of of potential adulterious desires? Of course not. But it is far better than not caring at all. And besides that, holiness is true beauty; whether it is debatable if self-care would be included within the realm of matrimonial holiness or self-denial.
Again, if one struggling from same-sex attraction has no original attraction to the opposite sex, it isnt a matter of neglect from a heterosexual relationship that would possibly stifle their attraction, but it is a precursor depravity that onsets the relationship with this issue; and I dont know how many would counsel people to get married if in the least there isnt a formal attraction? Maybe I'm off and this is the answer for some, I dunno?
I understand that all sin needs grace, and all good things come from above; and my point is not to say that those who sin by way of SSA need coddling. Only that it is a sin which is uncommon, and as such many simply will not know how to give support. All they will offer is "pray the gay away." And while that is a significant part of our warfare, in reality, God sometimes allows this struggle for a season, and other times for a lifetime. I am not suggesting we call sinful lusts; whether gay or straight unsinful, it is sin; in the realm that even if our actions are perfect our thoughts would condemn us; yet, there is a contrast between temptation, and acting on it. My concern is that the acting on it could use better support until the transformation, which is only wrought by God, takes place in lue of not having the same outlet of marriage as those who lust heterosexually.
And, as far as marriage being a means of grace; I most likely misspoke, as I only intended to mean marriage is the prescribed biblical preventative against sexual immorality, fornication, and Satans sexual temptations (as I understand 1 Cor. explaining.)
Thank you all for this good conversation. I will think about what has been written. God Bless.